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need some help understanding him


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ok i will try to make this as short as possible

I have known this guy for about a year now. He has come in to my work at least once or twice a week. Amazing chemistry between us. Well we finally went out to see what could possible happen. We continued to see eachother over a month and seeing eachother like 3-4 a week. It seemed to moving really fast, but it felt like it was right so i did not slow things down. Things did get intimate at this point. a little to soon for my prefrence but hey i couldn't help myself. Now he has been telling me things about the future like trips we will take this summer. How he just felt this was what he has been waiting for to connect with someone like me. He asked me to meet his family at his daughter's birthday party so i decided to go. Like 5 min before the party i felt sick and was unsure about going and called his cell to tell him i was not going to make it. He was really excited about me going so i went. I just felt it was way to soon for meet his family. Of coarse i should have followed my gut because things were not what i had hoped. I have never not had someone's family not like me and i kinda felt a lot of tension in the air and yada yada yada. they were just not very talkative with me or did they really care to hear anything about me soooooo..... A week goes by and i have really not seen him or talked to him. He finally stops by and i completly jump the gun and say things are going to quick. I was not ready to meet the family, lets slow things down and see what happens. He agreed feeling the same way that things felt a little weird and that we were still gonna hang out just not as serious. I was very comfortable with this



My problem is i am falling for him. I see him once a week and i cant wait till the day comes. He rarely ever calls me except to set up the date or to say hi for like 2 min. He still pops into my work a couple of times a week though. Here we are nearly 2 months into this. we have not been intimate and he will not come over to my house and hang out. We usually end up going to lunch or to a movie. He definatly knows i am intrested in him and that i am not seeing anyone else. Our last date he told me he was seeing someone else. A friend of 17 years, and that he did not know what was going on. Gave me little info on how serious things were getting. They stated seeing eachother right at the same time things were getting intimate with me. He rarely compliments me (suttle ways) He has made the comment that he is not sure if it is not meant to be but he is trying to make it be. He has assured me that he was not playing me for the sex that just happend completley in the wrong way. His face lights up when he sees me and he says he is very attracted to me and i have a wonderfull personality and he cant beleive that i am single or that he had ever a chance with me.


My questions

Do i continue to see him hoping that something will come of this and i can win him over this other girl or do i walk away before things get to complicated and i am attached.


Do you think he is really intrested in me and him running into that long life friend has made him feel like he needs to see about the what if with her?


the girls tell me to walk away and let it go

guys tell me he does not know he is confused and i should just let it be and see what happens.


I dont really know how hard i should push. He was very excited when i called to see if he wanted to get together this week no hestitation whats so ever.


I know this was not short and i am sorry if you had made it this far, but i just cant stop thinking about him.

I also dont know if this is bothering me because i have never been the other woman. I have always easily gotton the guy that i want and never have been pushed to the side. So this has become a challenge for me.


Any advice would be great just give me some thoughts on what i should do before i go crasy please


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Don't wait for this guy. Go find yourself some other fellows and have some dates. He can always look you up if the other relationship crashes and burns, and in the meantime, you'll keep going out and figuring out what you do and do not like in guys. You'll be better able to make your own choice. I would never wait for anybody unless it was because he had to go off to a job and asked me to. There is no point, though, in waiting for someone to 'test drive' somebody else.

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