oliveoil Posted September 11, 2007 Posted September 11, 2007 I have been dating my boyfriend since 2003. When I met him he was already seperated from his wife and two kids with whom he still shares a house. He says that he is not ready to leave the house yet because he is not a in a finacial position to do so. Housing is also pretty espensive and so is rent. I am also looking for a house beacuase I still live by my mother. He says that he wants to be finacially stable. He has a business which he is trying to get stablize and pays employes. He says that he want the business to be grouned first.He says that he does not want to find himself in a position where he cannot afford to support his two kids and has to go to court. Therefore he has not made any serious move to get divorce. I know for sure that he is not involved with his wife. Am I being unreasonable for letting him know that I am not happy with the situation and that he needs to deal with this matter? He says that when the time is right that he will do it and that I am pressuring him. Is it also right for him to say that he wants to be there to see his children grow? Should I have to wait? I sometimes feel like I don't really have any boyfriend because he is still married although he is seperated. Am I wasting my time or am I being unreasonable? what do you think about this situation.
annabelle75 Posted September 11, 2007 Posted September 11, 2007 So ........ you have been the other woman since 2003? If he lives with his wife than they are still together. I'm not sure if you are being naive or just in denial. What do you mean he is nol onger "with" his wife? Does that mean that he no longer sleeps with her? Have you met her? Does she know about you? This sounds like an affair to me. You might get more replies if you post this in the OM/OW forum.
Cad Rake Posted September 11, 2007 Posted September 11, 2007 Should I have to wait? Honey you don't "have" to do anything. This is a judgment call for you to make, nobody else. He is doing what he feels he has to do, you are doing what you feel you have to do. I don't think anyone here can give you any meaningful advice to make your decision easier in this situation.
jcster Posted September 11, 2007 Posted September 11, 2007 I recall that this was a common theme in letters to Ann Landers over the years. She always replied with the same answer, and I have a hard time disagreeing with "Saint Ann." If he really wanted to be out of his marriage and with you, he would be. Right now, it's convenient for him to have his cake and eat it too. If this situation doesn't work for you, then get out of it - he's not going to change any time soon.
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