Do I get attached too easily?

[TooMuchTheGentleman]

Ok, I have had a couple of drinks tonight, so forgive me if this is too frank or open in my question tonight.

 

 

I met someone new a few weeks back, met with them for coffee, spoke online, called, texted etc. Then they came over and we had a few drinks... tried to have sex, (before drinking we had already shared a kiss or two, interested in each other)... i say tried as the first time, which i do know better, i was too intoxicated to perform (her a bit too) , and the second time, once i had napped it off a bit, she was rather dehydrated, likewise not working out...

 

Ive never been good at even talking with more than one woman at a time, let alone dating around, even taking out more than one girl for coffee in a given time. This woman a couple years younger than myself at 25, is farther through college than me, a "nerd" like me, she an economics major, me a science and engineering major. Very attractive, intelligent etc.

 

My theory in dating and courting etc, is that you meet many day to day, then you narrow it down to people share good conversations with, have good times with, date those who show most promise, get closer to one or two, eventually narrowing it down to one person you date exclusively to see how far it can go, courtship, engagement, perhaps marriage.... me, im not gonna even really try to date anyone i dont see a future with, so its hard for me to even consider more than one woman at a time, as if one isnt good enough alone, then shes not high enough in my opinion to the one alone, so I can date only one woman at a time with any meaning.

 

On our last meeting, the girl im interested in at moment, came over, we watched movies, shared a pizza, didnt drink, talked, etc... ended up in bed. First time was nice, she was fulfilled though i wasnt. we fell asleep for a bit, went again, and that time we both were very happy with the results. I sstill wasnt up to my optimum so to speak, neither fully rested nor had i eaten well, either of which cause problems. So though the second that night was even better than the first, for both of us, i did tell her i still hoped she could see me at my peak ( see seemed all but wide eyed gaping mouth surprised, "that wasnt your peak?") as I already had trouble getting in even after she was fully aroused/lubricated, and hit her cervix and still had room to go...............

To explain, aside from being Scott Irish, I had a side effect from a med years ago, one of those erections lasting more than 4 hours, but didnt go to ER, it went away eventually, prolly after 12 hours, verrrrry sore, seemed to have stretched me out and prompted new tissue growth as I gained width and length, definiatly according to the woman i was very serious with at the time, intended a very long relationship with her ( just didnt work out). Hell, my ex fiance a week after she left me, was still living with me, we got drunk, she told me her new fav position with the new rebound guy, (it was one we couldnt do cause it hurt her, she told me the new guy was smaller than me, thats why it worked... i guess that helps a lil if a woman leaves you and still considers you better equipped than your replacement, right?).

Well, I wanted to see this new girl again, even after i ended up outa town a couple of weekends in a row, we didnt see each other. I have asked her out or over to my place a few times, realized i may be pushing it, I was kinda dumb and when we were talkin online, was kinda honest with her, saying i wasnt only interested in sleeping with her, actually wanted to just enjoy being around her, didnt get her a chance to respond, as i was in a hurry to get offline, errands to run....

 

The problem and curiousity to me, is did i come on too strong, too interested in her, did i become too attached too quickly to her and clingy in a way, which i have been accused of? Even though Ive only talked to her on the phone, text or online, and only one time in person in the last month, but have admittedly suggested to her a few times that we get together again,now that my exfiance is off my couch and we dont have to sneak around like teenagers. Have I come on too strong, she perhaps found something else, lost interest despite suggesting she had wanted to come spend the night now that the apartment is mine alone, etc?

 

I realize i am not ready and its too soon for anything serious, but at the same time id like to get to know her better, seem to meet manyof my criteria as it were. Or did i scare her letting her know that I wasnt at my peak last time ( I really wasnt, when rested and well fed I perform much better and with much more strength. She said I didnt hurt her or anything, said "no complaints".)?

Did i screw up by being honest and straightforward, letting her know I wasnt only after getting in bed with her again and actually enjoyed her company and just talking?

 

Help? Too mature for my age knwing what i want, or too easily pleased or attatched?

[TooMuchTheGentleman]

Sorry so complex.

Point was to ask, do I take things too seriously too quick, do I get attached too quick, or did I scare her either by being clingy in a sense, or making mention about that not being my physical peak in size or endurance?

[VIP]

It's better to just be yourself and be sincere. There are some people who like to take things slow, and then there are others, who get attached quickly, either one is ok.