scaredinlove Posted September 3, 2007 Posted September 3, 2007 This is a question that crossed my mind many times...I use protection but still there is always a small possibility... MM says if I get pregnated he wants me to have the baby, he says he would be a father for he/she. I have three kids on my own and I honestly don't know what I would do. I think this is something you will only know what to do when it happens.It situation is different. Like RC said the best is to protect yourself so it dosen't happen to you.
Can'tGiveUp Posted September 3, 2007 Posted September 3, 2007 I am no longer with MM but if I was...wow tough question. My initial response would be to keep it. But the reality is, that if he wasn't going to leave his wife, then I probably would have an abortion. He wouldn't have wanted that but I would have to consider my children that I already have. Of course, since I have had a tubal, we never even had a "what if..." discussion about pregnancy.
Author smoochygirl Posted September 3, 2007 Author Posted September 3, 2007 I am pregnant by my exMM. He wants me to have the baby, and wants to support me. But I do not want him to be part of my life because after all I ve been through and all his lies, I prefer to be a single mother. My baby does not need a father like that. He will be a BAD example. He was manupulative, cheated on me already and emotionally abusive. Even if I was an OW, I am an extremely great person, and come from a great loving educated family who will help me with my situation. It s going to be tough but I will be the best mother I can. I hope that adds something to your questions I know how you feel, my mom was in that position before, I know you are in pain, all i can advice you is please don't ever give your child to your husband and his family. I can see you will be a great mother, i hope my mom thought of that before leaving me to my dad's family.
Author smoochygirl Posted September 3, 2007 Author Posted September 3, 2007 well smoochy girl shouldn't be asking hard questions if theres a chance she will get a hurtful answer Marielle. should RC curb the truth because her mother f&cked her life up? I'm sorry smoochygrl but where something on your chest that you had zero control over like a scarlet A is pretty disturbing you should seek some counseling Thanks but i don't need counseling, i am doing good now. I am married with a great husband and back to college pursuing my career. I just ask the question because i just recently found out something about my mom's A.
Author smoochygirl Posted September 3, 2007 Author Posted September 3, 2007 Exactly!!!! A forum cannot possibly give her the counseling that she requires. I am of the POV that any OW coming here to look for sympathy in an action taken by 2 ADULTS where a child's heart is at stake will NOT get it from me! I will SPIT FIRE for the sake of the "child"! This is not a question of "Love" whatsoever! This is CARELESS STUPIDITY! PERIOD! I am not in the forum for counseling. I was lurking around the internet looking for an answer to my mom's problem in her situation with her MM, i love her and i don't want getting hurt. Im also sure that the OW or BS are looking for support, some people are giving tough advice that would really be helpful with their situation. You are not giving advice but opinion which would be more helpful if you are a little polite, just a lil bit polite. Now if they got pregnant by MM it is their decision to choose that path in life.
Author smoochygirl Posted September 3, 2007 Author Posted September 3, 2007 I was pregnant by MM and I had an abortion. It was a complete surprise that I was pregnant as I'm very careful and use contraception. I struggled with the decision I made, and MM wanted to continue the pregnancy. However, our situation was too difficult at the time. I worried for my safety, the problems of my baby and I simply couldn't do it to his children. I had an abortion. Hardest decision to make and I suffered plenty with the decision afterward, still do. The strange thing is, if it ever happened again (it wont, I've made sure of that) I would probably have made a different decision. But I'm also a carer for my mum, I work hard to support my family, I couldnt rely on MM to provide any childcare support or even acknowledge the child once it was born. It seemed the best at the time. Is your MM happy to know your pregnant? or is her nervous and afraid?
Je Ne Regrette Rien Posted September 3, 2007 Posted September 3, 2007 Is your MM happy to know your pregnant? or is her nervous and afraid? I am no longer pregnant, Smoochygirl. As I said, I had an abortion. MM wanted me to have the baby, but it was more a fantasy the way he reacted initially. Once I talked about his youngest son having to deal with the fact of not being his youngest child, how his W may react (and I thought extremely serious consequences were likely) he grew nervous, but still didn't really see the possible consequences and my growing fears. He was happy for me to do what I thought was right, and he did support me through the abortion, although if I had fully decided I was keeping the pregnancy, I'm not sure how long his positive reaction would have remained.
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