Stacid Posted August 30, 2007 Posted August 30, 2007 A few weeks ago I went on a retreat to help me bring peace into my life. It was a touchy-feely kind of thing, not usually my cup of tea, but I actually ended up enjoying myself. There was this very attractive man there, a divorcee, who I noticed kept looking my way all through the retreat. At the end of the second day, 1/2 of the group was to sit in chairs in a circle with the other half behind them, and the ones standing were to massage the people in front of them and whisper a kind word to that person. The whole circle rotated so everyone got a chance to hear from everyone. When it came time for this, again, VERY attractive man to give me my massage, he whispered to me the following:"I am very glad to have met you this weekend and I look forward to getting to know you better. You have a beautiful smile." Nice, right? Then, like one second later, he whispered again: "I wish they would change this music, then we could have some REAL fun." There was nice peaceful music playing in the background. So, how would you take this last comment? Was he coming on to me? Is there another way to interpret this statement that is non-sexual? Should I feel bad that I kind of liked that he said that? Any thoughts would be much appreciated.
tanbark813 Posted August 30, 2007 Posted August 30, 2007 Then, like one second later, he whispered again: "I wish they would change this music, then we could have some REAL fun." So, how would you take this last comment? I'd be like, "Dude, you're gonna have to get me really drunk first."
underpants Posted August 30, 2007 Posted August 30, 2007 How smooth....ha ha ha. I would want to research the membership records of the retreat. My guess is that smooth snag man is a regular.
Author Stacid Posted August 30, 2007 Author Posted August 30, 2007 Deep down I know it's creepy, but this guy is so hot. It would be like Brad Pitt whispering this into your ear while giving you a massage. Can you blame me for not hating it?
Author Stacid Posted August 30, 2007 Author Posted August 30, 2007 No, but there's a weekly meeting for the next 12 weeks and he'll be there. I think they're giving contact info. to everyone.
blind_otter Posted August 30, 2007 Posted August 30, 2007 I dunno. Regardless of how hot any man is I always judge them by their level of intrinsic creepiness. Even the most perfect physical specimen can be a grade-A nimrod. Personally I think the whole touchy feely thing is creepy, too. shiver.
Author Stacid Posted August 30, 2007 Author Posted August 30, 2007 I know, right? I only went to this thing because my mom had been hounding me about it. My first foray into the touchy feely world of creepy hot guys. Haha!
sofakingmad Posted August 30, 2007 Posted August 30, 2007 . Personally I think the whole touchy feely thing is creepy, too. shiver. like an episode of real sex on hbo.
sofakingmad Posted August 30, 2007 Posted August 30, 2007 the last retreat i went to was for Catholic grammar school in 8th grade. i don't remember it being very touchy feely.
whichwayisup Posted August 30, 2007 Posted August 30, 2007 Did you like him? Feel attracted to him? I say, date him and see where it goes...
blind_otter Posted August 30, 2007 Posted August 30, 2007 Ew, WWIU, you're not really advising her to date this creepy person, are you? And yes, it does sound like an episode of real sex on HBO. I'm Just Saying.
LoveLace Posted August 30, 2007 Posted August 30, 2007 It does sound creepy to touch and whisper things to someone you don't even know! However, the massage was an organized group activity, so he seized the opportunity to fire on you. It might have been better for him to leave it at the "nice meeting you" though...the 2nd part is coming on a little strong. If it didn't make you uncomfortable, then it doesn't necessarily matter if others tell you it's "creepy". If you enjoyed it I don't think that makes you weird or anything....you noticed the guy and thought he was hot to begin with, so it was a mutual liking to my understanding. Obviously he was confident that you dug him, too. I would just feel him out and if he appears "normal" with casual conversation, perhaps you could pursue it just a little further, but it also depends on what your looking for, cuz it could be that he's just targeting you as a piece of a**. Just be careful and if you get together with him outside of the retreat make sure your in well-lit public places!
Author Stacid Posted August 30, 2007 Author Posted August 30, 2007 I am attracted to his hotness, the personality is a bit suspect. I would never seriously date a guy like this, but I might hang out with him for fun.
Art_Critic Posted August 30, 2007 Posted August 30, 2007 and you expected a guy at a retreat to be what ? Wonder why he was there.. to pickup on women that are in the need for an emotional retreat .. what a putz Does he howl at the moon ?
LoveLace Posted August 30, 2007 Posted August 30, 2007 I am attracted to his hotness, the personality is a bit suspect. I would never seriously date a guy like this, but I might hang out with him for fun. That sounds like a plan.
whichwayisup Posted August 30, 2007 Posted August 30, 2007 Ok, I'll rephrase my comment - Get to know him as a person, or as you say - For fun. Just make sure you two have the same idea when it comes to "fun"...
Author Stacid Posted August 30, 2007 Author Posted August 30, 2007 Absolutely. I could never look at myself in the mirror if I actually took this guy too seriously. Just fun to flirt with, maybe hang out with, not a whole lot more. I'm not really the type to do the whole casual encounter thing. I'm pretty self-aware, so I would never put myself into a situation where my personal safety would be compromised. Just harmless fun. I guess what he said was so forward I thought--there's no way this guy meant what I heard him say. But it sounds like my original interpretation is what everyone is thinking. Crazy!
underpants Posted August 30, 2007 Posted August 30, 2007 So at the next circle massage, when he comes up behind you ...or you behind him. Whisper in his ear...chicabow chicabow bow.
sweetbutcheeky Posted August 30, 2007 Posted August 30, 2007 Then, like one second later, he whispered again: "I wish they would change this music, then we could have some REAL fun." There was nice peaceful music playing in the background. So, how would you take this last comment? Was he coming on to me? Is there another way to interpret this statement that is non-sexual? Should I feel bad that I kind of liked that he said that? Any thoughts would be much appreciated. That's when it would be so helpful to read someone's mind! Hmm could be thinking 'let's get it on' music or 'dance music'. I think that it was probably on the creepy side too. Though depends if you look at it on it's own or together with the first comment, which was nice.
StayClose Posted August 31, 2007 Posted August 31, 2007 The only difference between creepy and hot is how you choose to react to it. From a man's persepctive, if he likes a woman and would like to persue the possible relationship, he has to comminicate his romantic interest to her one way or another. If she's receptive to it, it's hot. If not, it's creey. From reading your message, I would say you found him and his behavoir hot.
melodymatters Posted August 31, 2007 Posted August 31, 2007 I'm not getting where this guy is so " super creepy". I mean we have people playing a version of musical massage chairs here, and the guy says basically " i'm glad to meet you " pays your smile a compliment and then makes a JOKE about the music.....so ?? I don't get where a joke about what was probably some pretty gay new age music means he's saying " lets f*ck", he could have just thought the music was gag worthy and meant that some rock-n-roll would be more 'fun". having said all of this though, the whole thing sounds pretty queer and I WOULD be hesitant about dating somone who REGULARLY goes to "touchy feely" events. It brings to mind drum circles and psuedo hippies who don't shower enough.
Author Stacid Posted August 31, 2007 Author Posted August 31, 2007 That's what I was wondering--if there was any other way to interpret his statement. I don't want to assume anything, because you know what they say about assuming. I am so with you all on the touchy-feely stuff. I didn't get the idea he was some pseudo-hippie pot smoking drum circle guy. He seemed more frat boy to me. I don't know, I just didn't know how to take him and wondered what others might say. My friends don't know I went to the touchy feely retreat, so I can't ask their opinions without looking like a touchy feely weirdo myself.
tanbark813 Posted August 31, 2007 Posted August 31, 2007 Maybe he wanted them to put on the Hokey Pokey. That's what it's all about.
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