Is This Lady For Real?

[TODD]

I've been dating this lady for about a year now and lately i've been finding out some strange things about her.

 

One is that she can not tolerate any injury to insects. She had ants in her apt. And when i was going to spray them with ant killer she told me not to hurt them.

 

So i was going to buy some ant hotles, and she said that was inhumane and cruel to let themsuffer that way.

 

She got on that hand vac instead and vacummed them all up then dumbep it out side in the back yard.

 

She says she hates to see any animal suffer, yet when we watch t.v. and the person can get in an accident and die and the dog, cat or whatever is injured she says "ohhhh poor litle thing".

 

Her reasoning is that animals do no understand like people do so she is very compassionate towards them and is their voice for them.

 

Is this obsessive do you think? She lives in a clean apt. Don't get me wrong, she don't want to hurt anything that is all.

 

I guess that is enough for now, what do you people on here think about this lady?

 

She is mid thirties, so not a young girl.

Thank you in advance.

 

Todd

[Tony T]

I think her behavior is a little obsessive. However, there's probably a good reason for it. Perhaps in her youth she witnessed an animal get hit by a car or shot by a hunter and this traumatized her. Perhaps she had great difficulty dealing with the death of a pet.

 

I'd say if this is the only major problem you see with her, you've found yourself a great lady. Hang onto her. I like animals myself...although I don't mind killing ants, roaches, spiders, lizards, scorpions, snakes and a few other creepy things.

 

Learn to accept this part of her character and don't criticize her. Of all the problems a man could have with a lady, this ranks way down at the very bottom in significance.

[Leikela]

[color=indigo]

Todd,

 

I think you're looking into this a little too deeply. There are people out there that feel strongly for animals. Some people like animals better then people. That doesn't make your girlfriend abnormal. That is just where her passion lies. Some people love cars, some people are passionate about baseball, etc etc... It is really all about one's personality and preference.

 

I think it's great that your girlfriend is so passionate about animals. It takes a kind heart to care that much about another living creature. I would look at this as a positive attribute.

[/color]

[Reckless]

I don't quite understand the problem here. Your lady doesn't like to see creatures (even tiny creatures) harmed - that's okay, there's room on this planet for all - especially the compassionate.

 

Are you worried that she loves the little creatures more than you?

Does her 'weird' behavior (which I personally don't see as imbalanced) stop her from leading a 'normal' life or interacting with people?

Do you fear she as an obsessive/compulsive disorder?

Are you worried she'd neglect any future children in favor of our four legged friends?

Are you embarrassed by her and wondering if you can introduce her to your friends?

 

You say you've been dating this lady for a year, if you love her you'll accept her quirkey idiosyncrasies as a charming part of her personality. You're heading "Is this lady for real" was somewhat distainfull as if you found her behavior comically distasteful - maybe you would like to clarify what exactly you want advice about. Loving an ant lover? or killing ants mercifully.

 

I don't mean to be harsh but unless you feel she has a mental disorder (in which case you should seek medical advise) I do not see a problem with your gentle ant-loving girlfriend.

[HokeyReligions]

I don't see this as strange, quirky, or abnormal in any way.

 

There was a movie made a long time ago, that showed actual death scenes. Real film of people and animals dying - in different circumstances. The vast majority of people who watched this movie said they could not watch when the animals died, but were okay with watching people.

 

 

I love animals. I'm not crazy about bugs and have no problem exterminating them, but, I can understand that others may value their lives too and would not hurt them, and I respect that.

 

Someone once asked me if I saw a dog and a child in the street and a car was barrelling down the road, who would I rush to save? I said there is absolutly no question - I would get them both - or die with them.

 

I think all life is valuable. As much as I have a phobia about bugs - I know that some are necessary to keep down the population of others.

 

It's not a matter of her being strange, but a matter of you understanding, and Accepting, the depth of her compassion. It can be hard to live with -- my husband knows that. My five wonderful dogs are all rescues. All of my dogs have always been rescues. My husband has seen my tears when I can't save one, and my joy when I do. He knows I love him, but he also knows that if I had to choose between him and the dogs I probably would not be able to make the choice. But that doesn't mean I love him less, or put the dogs first. Its a different kind of love, apples and oranges, but each love is total. Perhaps your gf feels this way too.

 

Something to think about is, if you two owned a house that had a termite infestation - would she be able to have an exterminator come out and get rid of the termites?

[Pookette]

Todd:

 

I think this girl is very compassionate towards animals. That's all. I am the same way myself.

 

Story goes, in Return of the Jedi, when Jabba the Hutt ate that frog-looking thing, I cried my 5 year old head off. My mom had to stop the movie. But I didn't blink an eye when Storm Troopers were killed. I also gave a kid a black eye when I was little because he was pulling legs off of bugs.

 

I've never seen Old Yeller and I don't like killing bugs (except mosquitoes, of course). Just appreciate that you have a very caring individual in your life, instead of someone who enjoys killing for the fun of it.