Woggle Posted August 28, 2007 Posted August 28, 2007 Huh ? Mr. Lucky What I meant to say was that if she truly is trustworthy she should have no issue signing a paper that proves her trustworthiness.
Touche Posted August 28, 2007 Posted August 28, 2007 What I meant to say was that if she truly is trustworthy she should have no issue signing a paper that proves her trustworthiness. Bull. One can be trustworthy and not agree with the concept of a prenup.
Woggle Posted August 28, 2007 Posted August 28, 2007 Bull. One can be trustworthy and not agree with the concept of a prenup. True but a trustworthy woman should understand the situations facing men today.
lonelybird Posted August 28, 2007 Posted August 28, 2007 I am thinking if a man wants me to sign a prenups, I would feel insecure, seems like he is planing to walk out marriage ALREADY
Touche Posted August 28, 2007 Posted August 28, 2007 True but a trustworthy woman should understand the situations facing men today. That's just silly. And a trustworthy man should understand that his trustworthy woman wouldn't take advantage of him. And what situations do men face? Women have it tough too. That's irrelevant to the discussion at hand.
Woggle Posted August 28, 2007 Posted August 28, 2007 I am thinking if a man wants me to sign a prenups, I would feel insecure, seems like he is planing to walk out marriage ALREADY No a man signing a prenup wants to protect his ass when you walk out of the marriage.
Touche Posted August 28, 2007 Posted August 28, 2007 No a man signing a prenup wants to protect his ass when you walk out of the marriage. If you pick the right woman, one with morals and values, even if the marriage doesn't work out, she won't try to screw you.
Woggle Posted August 28, 2007 Posted August 28, 2007 If you pick the right woman, one with morals and values, even if the marriage doesn't work out, she won't try to screw you. Women tend to change their personality though.
Trialbyfire Posted August 28, 2007 Posted August 28, 2007 I would never get married again without a prenup. A woman has to protect her assets...
lonelybird Posted August 28, 2007 Posted August 28, 2007 No a man signing a prenup wants to protect his ass when you walk out of the marriage. anyway prenups doesn't seem this man put much faith in the love and marriage?
Touche Posted August 28, 2007 Posted August 28, 2007 Women tend to change their personality though. That's ridiculous. I mean if you're Sybil maybe... Sheesh... Oh and if you think that, you never lived with my ex. Talk about multiple personalities..you have NO idea!
Woggle Posted August 28, 2007 Posted August 28, 2007 That's ridiculous. I mean if you're Sybil maybe... Sheesh... Oh and if you think that, you never lived with my ex. Talk about multiple personalities..you have NO idea! How many times have you heard men ask what happened to my wife. Overnight his wife became a different person and now blames him for everything. I think I would rather protect myself from a woman like this.
lonelybird Posted August 28, 2007 Posted August 28, 2007 How many times have you heard men ask what happened to my wife. Overnight his wife became a different person and now blames him for everything. I think I would rather protect myself from a woman like this. so you just don't trust your discernment for good and steady woman
Touche Posted August 28, 2007 Posted August 28, 2007 so you just don't trust your discernment for good and steady woman EXACTLY! That was my point. Well said.
Touche Posted August 28, 2007 Posted August 28, 2007 How many times have you heard men ask what happened to my wife. Overnight his wife became a different person and now blames him for everything. I think I would rather protect myself from a woman like this. I've heard women say it just as many times about their husbands.
VIP Posted August 28, 2007 Posted August 28, 2007 Nobody thinks about divorce when they get married. However let's be realistic, 52% of marriages end in divorce. Look what happened to Paul McCartney and Britney Spears, they probably also thought that it will be forever. Even if nothing happens it's good to have a prenup for peace of mind. Interestingly, the author of this thread thought it would be a good idea to protect her inheritance with a prenup. So why is it not ok for him to want to protect himself?
Author Lauriebell82 Posted August 28, 2007 Author Posted August 28, 2007 Wow, I can't believe how many responses my thread got! Anyway, I read about the little debate, i guess from my perspective I just don't like the concept of a prenup. I know all about the divorce rate, I just think it kills the whole idea behind marriage. In the slim chance we would get divorced I would never try to screw him over, I'm not that kind of person, i'm not decieted or anything like that and I love the guy so much. As far as my inheritance, I trust my boyfriend, yeah i could protect it if i wanted to, but I dont plan on getting divorced so I don't see the need to worry about it.
VinaAmez Posted August 29, 2007 Posted August 29, 2007 Lauriebell, don't go by the divorce rate. It's only a number that shouldn't matter. If you don't want to sign one then don't.
Author Lauriebell82 Posted August 29, 2007 Author Posted August 29, 2007 I agree that the divorce doesn't mean all that much. I think statistics are based on incompatiblity, and i think that my bf and i are very compatible. Thanks for all your help, we are fine now, and i dont think there is a need for a prenup. Also, my dad told me that I can either put my inheritance in my own name or mine and my bfs name when we get married(my parents stocks). Not sure which I'm going to do, but thats probably going to be a long time from now that I will have to make that decision.
allina Posted August 29, 2007 Posted August 29, 2007 I just don't like the concept of a prenup. I know all about the divorce rate, I just think it kills the whole idea behind marriage. It really does kill the romantic, fairytale idea of marriage, however we are living in the real world where a prenup is useful and realistic. I'm actually torn down the middle when it comes to my feelings about prenups. On one hand I would be slightly hurt if my fiance asked for one because if/when I get married I'm committing for life and I don't want to feel like we need a safety net. But, on the other hand I feel like we have to be realistic. Of course no one thinks they will get divorced when they are planning their wedding, you're not the only one that says you won't need one, but you can never guarantee anything. It's sort of a rational vs. emotional battle for me.
Trialbyfire Posted August 29, 2007 Posted August 29, 2007 Consider me cynical about marriage. I see a prenup as a way to filter out anyone who is either unrealistically romantic or who is a gold-digger. With the current divorce figures of which I'm part of the stat, marriages are disposable.
mental_traveller Posted August 29, 2007 Posted August 29, 2007 I don't plan to get married, and prenups have no legal force where I live, but if I was and they did, I would definitely get one. Half of marriages end in divorce, and probably a decent chunk of the ones that "survive" have some kind of cheating, abuse, or other serious problems. IMO it's insanity not to cover your ass in the event that things go wrong. Your bf sounds like he is just sensible and thinking with his head.
mental_traveller Posted August 29, 2007 Posted August 29, 2007 Prenups are nothing more than a safety net. IMO, a person who presently has no assets but wants one has no faith in the marriage lasting. I have home, health, and legal insurance, along with a will - that doesn't mean I expect to be sued, get a chronic illness, have my house burn down, or die. Equally, I don't see how having a prenup means you have no faith in the marriage lasting. It means that, in the *possible* event that it breaks down sometime in the next 40-50 years, you have a fair and reasonable agreement already in place. In an era when half of marriages fail, dealing with this possibility in advance is a sign of maturity, realism, and responsibility. If he had no faith in the marriage then he wouldn't get married, would he?
mental_traveller Posted August 30, 2007 Posted August 30, 2007 so you just don't trust your discernment for good and steady woman Of course not. No one has infallible judgement. It is not possible to predict with 100% reliability that a person is going to be upstanding, moral, fair and trustworthy over the entire duration of a marriage. If it was, then no one would get divorced or have affairs would they?
Star Gazer Posted August 30, 2007 Posted August 30, 2007 I have home, health, and legal insurance, along with a will - that doesn't mean I expect to be sued, get a chronic illness, have my house burn down, or die. Equally, I don't see how having a prenup means you have no faith in the marriage lasting. It means that, in the *possible* event that it breaks down sometime in the next 40-50 years, you have a fair and reasonable agreement already in place. In an era when half of marriages fail, dealing with this possibility in advance is a sign of maturity, realism, and responsibility. If he had no faith in the marriage then he wouldn't get married, would he? You have medical, home, and legal insurance because you cannot possibly trust and have complete faith in your genetics (health), the weather (your home), or 3rd parties (your health, home, and livelihood) who you're not involved in a life-long committed relationship with. You should, however, be able to trust and have complete faith in your spouse - the person you're committing your LIFE to - to not be the kind of person to take more than what they have contributed to the marriage if it ever does end. Without that trust and faith, there is no marriage. With that trust and faith, there is no need for a prenup.
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