simplegirl Posted August 27, 2007 Posted August 27, 2007 Ok, long story short. My best friend was in an A with a guy and I didn't know it at first. A group of us went out and that is when I met my MM who happens to be her MM friend. My MM and I started our A and then she confided in me about their's. Since then it has been out in the open with the 4 of us. Her MM started to back away from her about a year ago. He felt she was getting too attached and so forth. Well, my MM and I have gotten closer. If you have read my past threads you know that my MM has talked to me about leaving and what will happen when he leaves his M. I would tell my friend this stuff as someone to confide in since she was well aware of everything. My MM doesn't tell her MM much about it because when he started to discuss his leaving with him her MM tried to convince him not to. Not for any other reason other than he's scared his A will come out. So my friend is trying to convince me to push him to leave, basically back him in a corner. That is not me at all. Since I haven't taken her advice she took it upon herself to call her MM (or xMM whatever they are now) and question him all about my MM and his intentions and what he has been telling me. This was not her place. She told me she just asked him what was up with XXXX (my MM) leaving his W. I got a call the other night from my MM and he was mad because I guess a lot more was said than she told me. He told me that what him and I discuss and talk about needs to stay with us because she is running her mouth. Then he basically asked me if I was backing him into a corner because none of this is something that can just be done overnight. My question is should I say anything to my friend about what she did? I would never take something like this upon myself like she did. There is so much more history with her and my other friend was in no way surprised that she did this. Should I say something or just let it go? I haven't talked to her since I found out about all this, almost a week ago.
GreenEyedLady Posted August 28, 2007 Posted August 28, 2007 Why does she have his number anyway? I'd give her a mouthful...and watch your back...She's no friend...
NoIDidn't Posted August 28, 2007 Posted August 28, 2007 She got dumped by her MM and wants the same for you. Why is that so surprising? But I would be more concerned about him. A man that is making so many plans to leave wouldn't be so mad at you for discussing something with someone that he was once very openly involved with you in front of. "These things don't happen overnight", HA! Dangling carrot anyone?
whichwayisup Posted August 28, 2007 Posted August 28, 2007 This is only going to cause drama and getting too involved in eachother's lives this way WILL blow up badly. I wouldn't blow up at her because who knows what she is capable of if she's pissed at you and does something malcious...Just slowly back off, don't confide in her anymore, and when she pushes you to get the ball rolling in your situation, don't react at all. She doesn't need to know what you do after you two talk...
waiting4heaven Posted September 2, 2007 Posted September 2, 2007 Tread easy...but yes, you need to confront her!!! My exBFF and I had the same thing going and both of us came clean with each other and the MM became friends, however, in the end it was my MM and I who ended up jaded because of my so called BFF running her mouth to God and country about me and MM but not about her doings.....Say something and squash it quick before it gets out of control. DON"T TELL HER ANYTHING ELSE OR ALLOW HER TO KNOW ANY DETAILS....she isn't a friend if she is only being jealous because you got your MM and she lost hers......
Lyssa Posted September 2, 2007 Posted September 2, 2007 Your MM is quite right. Whatever that is discussed between you both should be between just the two of you. Who knows what your friend will do next if you piss her off? Slowly backing off would be a good idea... or stop confiding in her.
Tsuki no Michi Posted September 2, 2007 Posted September 2, 2007 From personal experience: some "friends" have a tendency not to respect personal boundaries, regardless the situation. She sounds like one of them. IMO those are not true friends. I agree with GEL, she needs a good talking to. Until she respects the boundaries of another person's life (yours), then I would simply stop confiding in her. TNM
Je Ne Regrette Rien Posted September 2, 2007 Posted September 2, 2007 Your friend sounds like she is channelling her hurt into your R - I mean, I know I compare my MM to other MM's on here, not that it makes any sense to do that as they're different people, but I just do. It may be subconscious, but its still not right that she does that. I would confront her, in a calm and kind way, just to say you would appreciate if she didnt call your MM to talk about your R with him as it causes lengthy discussions between you and MM. Leave it at that and then dont talk to her further about your R in any way. She sounds like she has her own agenda.
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