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Something beautiful, am I going too fast?


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Posted

Well, no reason to put every single detail into motion, but this is the highlights of the situation. :p I've met a girl, she's sweet, attractive, all those good things. We've been dating for almost a week now, and things have moved much quicker than expected. We're not using the 'fated three words' just yet in person, but we've been writing notes back and forth (I know, teenage love right?). Well, she's very shy, and not one to move forward. Which means, it's my job to know when it's time.

 

Can anyone offer some 'tell-tell' signs as to when it's time to push to the next level? Or, the next base, as most refer to it? I want to pursue this relationshp, but don't want to scare her off by beign too forward, ya know?

Posted

I know you said "teenage", but how old are each of you?

Posted

Generally, if you're under the age of 25 it's to early to be in a "relationship". Work on yourself, your education, your goals and just date around. Find out who is out there and most important who you are first.

Posted

There is no need to rush into anything. But when you say you want to move things foward, do you mean sexually or in regards to the relationship status?

 

Either way... No rush. Sexually: You absolutely need to be attentive to her boundaries and her timeframe for things. No woman is so shy that she misreads her own level of confort with a man. So this needs to be mutual. There is nothing wrong with a long drawn out seduction campaign. You haven't been together a week, so I wouldn't be expecting anything more then first or second base. Just enjoy kissing and cuddling... I think as she gets more confortable with you, you will find the progression through the bases happens quite naturally. If not, write back in a month or so.

 

Relationship: in my experience, if the beginning is very whirlwind (such as you describe it), it is actually always better to put on the breaks then to drive full speed ahead. Enjoy getting to know each other. It's the best part.

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Posted

I know this may be a little odd reaching out to a forum, being such a young love situation, but I've been watching Loveshack for quite sometime and knew this is the place for answers. :)

 

Well.. I'll be turning 18 soon, and she is soon to be 17. She's very comfortable around me, and we both can open up to each other, make googly eyes, blah blah blah charlie manson. Anyways, I'm talking more on the lines of relation status, not sexual. :) I'd like to cover my ground before we pursue that, since.. well. She's the virgin in this, I'm not. So... *looks to the side* you see my worry. I've dated older women for 3 years now, me always the younger and the less immature one. In this situation, the table has turned. I feel that it's my responsibility to know when to conduct the first kiss, the first 'I love you' to tell her. She seems like.. she's okay with me calling her Sweetie, Baby, etc. So... I wonder if it's time to start it up and such.

 

And if it helps, I was VERY bothered at first with starting this, since.. It's almost time to move out, college, etc. etc. But I like her a lot, and see it as something worth pursuing. Any advice? Mainly, is it wrong to approach her tommorow mornign and look at her and whisper, "I love you" in her ear? I don't want her to freak out and think we're going to fast, ya know?

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