lost4ever Posted August 24, 2007 Posted August 24, 2007 Oh, I told MM it was over last Thursday, he sends me a text Monday saying he misses me, I didn't reply...today he calls, I answer he says he just bought me a plane ticket to another country for Labor day weekend. I didn't answer, I'm sooo confused I really want to go..really really (of course who wouldn't) but I am done with this, He is so pulling A game, he says hey I am giving you a vacation to somewhere I always wanted to go over a holiday weekend oh what to do
RealityCheck Posted August 24, 2007 Posted August 24, 2007 Oh, I told MM it was over last Thursday, he sends me a text Monday saying he misses me, I didn't reply...today he calls, I answer he says he just bought me a plane ticket to another country for Labor day weekend. I didn't answer, I'm sooo confused I really want to go..really really (of course who wouldn't) but I am done with this, He is so pulling A game, he says hey I am giving you a vacation to somewhere I always wanted to go over a holiday weekend oh what to do It really does not matter what other people "think" you should do. What matters is what YOU think you should do.
Author lost4ever Posted August 24, 2007 Author Posted August 24, 2007 yeah, I guess. I want to go, I mean who cares if I am just using him for a trip, right...not like he hasn't been using me! 1
bones Posted August 24, 2007 Posted August 24, 2007 Don't go. He upped the stakes because you pulled back. A plane ticket out of the country? Why not flowers and a note? Show him you are strong enough to not accept his bribe. If you give into pressure, he'll keep applying it until one day the lid blows off the situation.
Tomcat33 Posted August 24, 2007 Posted August 24, 2007 It really does not matter what other people "think" you should do. What matters is what YOU think you should do. I could not agree with RC more. Further to that note I would say, think of how you will fell when you get back. If you could just go on this trip and enjoy it for what it is, why not? But what might happen is you go and just being in a different country/city makes it THAT much more romantic, and the high is SUPER high. But when you come back to your life again without him the low is very low. Consider that
smoochygirl Posted August 24, 2007 Posted August 24, 2007 Oh, I told MM it was over last Thursday, he sends me a text Monday saying he misses me, I didn't reply...today he calls, I answer he says he just bought me a plane ticket to another country for Labor day weekend. I didn't answer, I'm sooo confused I really want to go..really really (of course who wouldn't) but I am done with this, He is so pulling A game, he says hey I am giving you a vacation to somewhere I always wanted to go over a holiday weekend oh what to do Agreed with RC. DO whatever will make you happy but be prepared because the more you get attached to him the more painful you will get someday.
annabelle75 Posted August 24, 2007 Posted August 24, 2007 Do what you feel comfortable with. What can you handle?
RealityCheck Posted August 24, 2007 Posted August 24, 2007 I could not agree with RC more. Further to that note I would say, think of how you will fell when you get back. If you could just go on this trip and enjoy it for what it is, why not? But what might happen is you go and just being in a different country/city makes it THAT much more romantic, and the high is SUPER high. But when you come back to your life again without him the low is very low. Consider that Yes! I agree with TC! You must be able to accept your choice whole heartedly.
Tomcat33 Posted August 24, 2007 Posted August 24, 2007 Sorry this is off topic: BONES you are totally cool. I like your pic and name, it is really different.
whichwayisup Posted August 24, 2007 Posted August 24, 2007 Oh, I told MM it was over last Thursday, he sends me a text Monday saying he misses me, I didn't reply...today he calls, I answer he says he just bought me a plane ticket to another country for Labor day weekend. I didn't answer, I'm sooo confused I really want to go..really really (of course who wouldn't) but I am done with this, He is so pulling A game, he says hey I am giving you a vacation to somewhere I always wanted to go over a holiday weekend oh what to do Hmmm...Very telling, isn't it? DO NOT GO. Ignore him, even if it KILLS your heart.
Cobra_X30 Posted August 24, 2007 Posted August 24, 2007 Oh, I told MM it was over last Thursday, he sends me a text Monday saying he misses me, I didn't reply...today he calls, I answer he says he just bought me a plane ticket to another country for Labor day weekend. I didn't answer, I'm sooo confused I really want to go..really really (of course who wouldn't) but I am done with this, He is so pulling A game, he says hey I am giving you a vacation to somewhere I always wanted to go over a holiday weekend oh what to do Oh man that is the most insulting thing EVER. Its about what he is thinking... not whats going through your head. He is expecting you to put out for a vacation? Doesnt that just seem Gross... ? Ummm.... I can't rememeber.... what's that word for a situation like this... where a guy tries to buy sex? Perhaps its time you prove to him that you cannot be purchased.
Darth Vader Posted August 24, 2007 Posted August 24, 2007 I agree with the two above. He just wants to take you away so you two can have sex, that's all!
Love4Eternity Posted August 25, 2007 Posted August 25, 2007 Oh, I told MM it was over last Thursday, he sends me a text Monday saying he misses me, I didn't reply...today he calls, I answer he says he just bought me a plane ticket to another country for Labor day weekend. I didn't answer, I'm sooo confused I really want to go..really really (of course who wouldn't) but I am done with this, He is so pulling A game, he says hey I am giving you a vacation to somewhere I always wanted to go over a holiday weekend oh what to do Take the vacation (without him of course) then ignore him...
RealityCheck Posted August 25, 2007 Posted August 25, 2007 Take the vacation (without him of course) then ignore him... That or; Grab the free vacation with him....and ignore him:D ......loll
Zona76 Posted August 25, 2007 Posted August 25, 2007 If you commit to the vacation you will only be in deeper. Excuse me for asking but is your goal, purpose or desire to have him divorce and marry you? UNDERSTAND this will never happen. And even if it did... he'd likely have another mistress after committing to you. Are you positive he has no one else but you (other than the wife of course)
LucreziaBorgia Posted August 25, 2007 Posted August 25, 2007 He's just locking you into your OW position by dangling an extra big carrot on the end of that stick. If you want to continue to be the OW, then go with him on that vacation. If you don't, then tell him thanks for the plane ticket, but you won't use them or any other plane tickets until he shows you signed and notarized divorce papers, and lease on his new place.
bones Posted August 25, 2007 Posted August 25, 2007 Tom Cat: Thanks. I appreciate the compliment. Let's hope our friend resists the vacation temptation. Bones
Lizzie60 Posted August 25, 2007 Posted August 25, 2007 yeah, I guess. I want to go, I mean who cares if I am just using him for a trip, right...not like he hasn't been using me![/quote] that could be mean that you are in fact 'strong' and you just want the 'treat'... If you do really 'mean' that...then fine.. BUT if this is just a justification to be with him for a weekend .. then you're not strong... you're weak... and he's winning. ONLY YOU know that.
Darth Vader Posted August 25, 2007 Posted August 25, 2007 If you commit to the vacation you will only be in deeper. Excuse me for asking but is your goal, purpose or desire to have him divorce and marry you? UNDERSTAND this will never happen. And even if it did... he'd likely have another mistress after committing to you. Are you positive he has no one else but you (other than the wife of course) I've asked her the same question, she has yet to answer that one.
bonehead Posted August 25, 2007 Posted August 25, 2007 That or; Grab the free vacation with him....and ignore him:D ......loll :lmao::lmao::lmao:
Author lost4ever Posted August 27, 2007 Author Posted August 27, 2007 sorry to leave you all hanging. Friday, before I left work I decided to go on the trip (no I don't want to be his wife, or for him to leave his wife) but I wanted to go on this vacation. Anyways, Firday night right before I got home from work my house was destroyed by a tornado. Life made the decision for me, I'm not going. 1
LucreziaBorgia Posted August 27, 2007 Posted August 27, 2007 Anyways, Firday night right before I got home from work my house was destroyed by a tornado. WTF? Do you have insurance, or some other type of help to get you back on your feet?
frannie Posted August 27, 2007 Posted August 27, 2007 sorry to leave you all hanging. Friday, before I left work I decided to go on the trip (no I don't want to be his wife, or for him to leave his wife) but I wanted to go on this vacation. Anyways, Firday night right before I got home from work my house was destroyed by a tornado. Life made the decision for me, I'm not going. You sound very together for someone who's just lost more or less everything.
Author lost4ever Posted August 27, 2007 Author Posted August 27, 2007 Yes everything is in order, we have insurance, we built our home 5 years ago, so it's sad. It's all up in the air now though my H and I where working on getting a divorce b/c of A I had now we have no idea how to act towards eachother, it sucks but what do you do???
Cobra_X30 Posted August 27, 2007 Posted August 27, 2007 Oh, man that sucks! Can you move in with family? I dont think the vacation is a good idea... but since your going... Have a Good Time!
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