Lishy Posted August 24, 2007 Posted August 24, 2007 Ok so we have many new members and lots of 'oldies' ie: people who have made thousands of posts and given thousands of pieces of advice! The question is .......... What brought you here? How did you find the shack? What has kept you here? My story is this .... I was in a situation with a guy who was a fk buddy but I wanted more I got rid of him in the end and found love with my current boyfriend but yet I still remain here, trawling through the posts when I have spare time. I do so because it's like a community here and I like the people. I also like helping others and seein a transformation in peoples mindsets! Nothing like seeing someone heartbroken and then in love again with someone worthy of them! So what is your story?
Krytellan Posted August 24, 2007 Posted August 24, 2007 I came here asking the question when is the right time to say I love you to the girl I was dating. It evolved into talking about my sexual inadequacies brought about by my ex-wife's mistreatment of me. After that, they just couldn't get rid of me.
Art_Critic Posted August 24, 2007 Posted August 24, 2007 Gravity... I had fallen down and couldn't get up...
yergawd Posted August 24, 2007 Posted August 24, 2007 Ended a long miserable celibate marraige. I had a few relationships, but felt like I understood only as far as being sexual and having fun dating. When I found my current Girlfriend I was determined to make this one work and be able to put my guard down somewhat. I had, and honestly still do have, huge trust issues. I enjoy answering ?s and getting points of view on myself, because I guess I don't really know what is "normal" in a relationship yet.
Touche Posted August 24, 2007 Posted August 24, 2007 In my case, I'd say it was a mid-life crisis. Trying to fix certain things about myself. I used to sometimes come on here and just lurk but once I started posting, I was hooked. I also liked the fact that I used to see a lot of the same names, every time I came back. It wasn't always just random people asking/giving advice.
LucreziaBorgia Posted August 24, 2007 Posted August 24, 2007 1. What brought you here? 2. How did you find the shack? 3. What has kept you here? 1. My H asked for an open marriage and I was looking for people in similar situations. 2. Googling 3. Voyeurism, mostly - just kidding (sort of). I found that posting about stuff helped me think about and rethink stuff in my life. I see LS as the blog that responds. So much has changed in my life since I first started posting. The first post I ever made was in response to a woman who had a preemie baby, and was overwhelmed. Having been there (my daughter was born 12 weeks early), I was able to offer up some advice/suggestions. I always wondered what happened to that woman. Her child would be three by now.
blind_otter Posted August 24, 2007 Posted August 24, 2007 I was married, but I also had a boyfriend. My husband went to prison and my boyfriend had just gotten OUT of prison. I became pregnant by the boyfriend. I miscarried. Boyfriend went crazy and tried to kill a friend who was staying at my house with me. Boyfriend went BACK to prison. I lose myself in a morass of drugs and alcohol for a while. I juggle men. A few months later I began dating a man from Scotland and had a long distance relationship. I went to visit him and we got engaged. He moved to the states to be with me and things went downhill from there. I kick the Scot out of my house and once more lose myself in a morass of drugs and alcohol for a while. While I was having said long distance relationship, I met a man who changed my life. I cheated on the Scottish man with this guy, call him X. X is older than me, with a child from a previous marriage -- all the wrong sorts of factors to attract me, historically. I went back to the Scot and left X for about 2 1/2 months but as soon as I kicked the Scot out of my house I called X and here we are, 2 years later, still together. A relationship built on a dubious foundation, at best. But we somehow manage to keep it going. I think the secret is that he challenges me to be a better person. We got sober together. Now my life is stable, for the first time ever. Weird. I credit a lot of my growth to loveshacking it.
tanbark813 Posted August 24, 2007 Posted August 24, 2007 My first experience with a girl cheating on me led me here in search of advice. I stuck around because I got a lot of really good support/advice and the people were generally cool. I've learned a lot from reading/posting on LS over the years. The addiction is now far too cemented within me to ever break loose.
Kamille Posted August 24, 2007 Posted August 24, 2007 I was being pursued by a very attractive married colleague of mine. I was desperate for some advice about cheating and infidelity (didn't even know the term other women existed) and found this website. Reading other people's struggles with the situation really helped me make up my mind about not getting involved with a MM. After MM, I had a whirlwind romance with a man who thoroughly broke my heart. Spent a lot of time getting advice by the good folks in the break up forum. Felt relieved to know other people were struggling with the same issues I was. Eventually graduated to the dating forum. Participating in discussions about other people's problem has put my own issues in my own love life into perspective. I feel like I now know myself a lot better and am a lot more confident about dating thanks to you guys. I also get a thrill, like Lishy, from seeing transformations in people's mindsets (So proud of you Chill Chic!)
melodymatters Posted August 24, 2007 Posted August 24, 2007 Good question !!! I was googling the phrase " he won't marry me" about some loser who I've sinced dumped a long time ago !!! Same as the rest of the gang : I stayed because It was interesting, because it felt good to be helpful, because there was the familiarity of the regulars, because I always liked advice columns for light reading, because I have too much free time on my hands, LOL
yergawd Posted August 24, 2007 Posted August 24, 2007 my daughter was born 12 weeks early, I was able to offer up some advice/suggestions. LB- My son was also a preemie sixteen weeks thirteen hrs passed the point of viability. My introduction to my son was Nurse Cratchett saying "Your son will die with in the hour, if he makes it through the night he won't make it through the week. And even if he does survive you have doomed him to a miserable life" Then she walks out of the NICU leaving me dumbfounded. 8 yrs and one month later I have an amazing son whose only tell is the braces on his legs and the catch in his step from extremely mild CP. Wish I could find that nurse now!
Touche Posted August 24, 2007 Posted August 24, 2007 LB- My son was also a preemie sixteen weeks thirteen hrs passed the point of viability. My introduction to my son was Nurse Cratchett saying "Your son will die with in the hour, if he makes it through the night he won't make it through the week. And even if he does survive you have doomed him to a miserable life" Then she walks out of the NICU leaving me dumbfounded. 8 yrs and one month later I have an amazing son whose only tell is the braces on his legs and the catch in his step from extremely mild CP. Wish I could find that nurse now! That's despicable! You should have reported her. I reported a nurse when I was in the hospital for the birth of our son.
yergawd Posted August 24, 2007 Posted August 24, 2007 That's despicable! You should have reported her. I reported a nurse when I was in the hospital for the birth of our son. Thanks Touche if I had my head together at the time I would have. I was still in shock. less than an hour ago I watched the C section and saw the smallest baby I had ever seen! 2 1.6 oz (double the normal weight atthis gestation) and just under 9 inches!
Touche Posted August 24, 2007 Posted August 24, 2007 Thanks Touche if I had my head together at the time I would have. I was still in shock. less than an hour ago I watched the C section and saw the smallest baby I had ever seen! 2 1.6 oz (double the normal weight atthis gestation) and just under 9 inches! Wow, that is amazing. Now, there's a miracle baby! Ok, sorry Lishy...didn't mean to go off topic.
Mustang Sally Posted August 24, 2007 Posted August 24, 2007 In response to the original questions: I came to LS because of problems in my M. I found it by googling a phrase that described my probs. I stayed because it's been very helpful, and I still need help! There are some amazingly intelligent and wise folks here. Sincerely.
Green Posted August 24, 2007 Posted August 24, 2007 I think I was looking for some college girl porn or something and I found some post on here about drunk college girls... and I thought the name loveshack was coo
underpants Posted August 24, 2007 Posted August 24, 2007 I had an unpleasant romantic experience, that refused to leave me alone for a long time. I think I fell into a patch of quicksand on my path. I lurked for months, reading archived threads. I posted as guest a few times. I found No Foolin's post and read it so many times. TP's posts made me see humor in a time when I was in mostly agony. When I finally did graduate out of the break up/coping area it really did feel weird. Now you are stuck with me. I hope I can give some decent advice here and there or at least a laugh. Maybe, just maybe I can figure out how to better chart my own course along the way. Thanks to all of you....
IpAncA Posted August 24, 2007 Posted August 24, 2007 I was surfing on the web for something related to sex and a thread on LS popped up. Then I kept the link for 2 months and then one day decided to look at the site and started reading posts and found it rather interesting. I wasn't going to stay on here but one day I just kept reading the posts from months ago and then decided I wanted to post on some of these topics as well. Plus I thought it would be a great way to gain some knowledge about relationships and even learn some knew stuff myself.
curiousnycgirl Posted August 24, 2007 Posted August 24, 2007 I was looking for insights as to why my B/F would completely lose interest in sex. BTW everyone LB was basically correct. 2 years (and lots of therapy) later we are still together, and things just keep getting better! I stay around because I have found some true wisdom here, and hope at times I can give back in some small way.
Trialbyfire Posted August 24, 2007 Posted August 24, 2007 D-day with a cheating spouse made me google "infidelity" for information. Learned a lot and stayed because there were some good people here.
Lizzie60 Posted August 25, 2007 Posted August 25, 2007 What brought you here? Nothing in particular... How did you find the shack? Google I think I was googling 'the Other Woman' and I find this forum. What has kept you here? I think this is BY FAR the most fun and interesting forum... I've visited a lot but this one tops them all. There are a lot of interesting people here... all sort of personalities that come through the posts... I like the funny posters, you know who they are... I like to laugh...so I always enjoy reading those 'hilarious' posts. I should add...that I visited other forums that were quite interesting but the posts were dated like 2-3 weeks earlier, not enough action... some forums are just 'dead'. :bunny:
wwjd Posted August 25, 2007 Posted August 25, 2007 I think I was looking for some college girl porn or something and I found some post on here about drunk college girls... and I thought the name loveshack was coo :lmao: that was awesome, dude. anyway: + What brought you here? i originally joined in . . . november of 2005, if i'm not mistaken. i had just turned 19, and i was facing a world of problems, namely with my now exbf. unbeknownst to me, i was in what they call and "on and off" type of relationship--you know, those really fun ones that only seem to bring false senses of happiness and real truths of despair. when i joined, we had broken up for the third time. i remember we hadn't spoken to each other for about two months, which, at that point, was our longest break. him having been my first everything, i was terribly, terribly heartbroken, and eagerly seeking clarification. i found it pretty soon, but my mistake was not believing it, which led to a down-spiraling of many more problems. + How did you find the shack? during that same time i met a girl named kelly. she was dealing with a breakup, too, so we'd talk to each other about it. one day she told me she had found this forum and gave me the link. i lurked around a while before registering, and since then, i've been completely hooked. the odd thing is that i lost complete contact with this girl and i never asked her for her screen name on here, so i have no idea if she still posts or not. strange. + What has kept you here? my inability to listen. had i listen to the advice given early on, i'd surely be telling a different story. after the breakup that brought me here, we developed an aggressive "on and off" relationship that has seriously warped my mind. on top of that chaos, problems i was enduring with my parents culminated in the most disheartening of ways. unfortunately, i haven't made much progress during my time on LS. if anything, i think i've done some serious regression. i still find it insanely difficult to deal with the dissolved relationships that i valued more than anything in this world. i still struggle with letting go. i still struggle with realizing both are no more what they once where, and will probably never be. i still struggle with thinking that things will one day look up. and i still struggle with having anything good to say about myself. someday, i hope, i will be able to say otherwise. (and of course, like the eagles sing, i can never ever leave this place now. and i wouldn't want to. i know some really super awesome people here, and i love them all. )
Kwo-ne'-she Posted August 25, 2007 Posted August 25, 2007 I was duped by a MM who claimed he was seperated and divorcing. He wrecked my world, and I had sank into a depression unlike any I have known. I was getting through it by the time I found Loveshack, but having other issues, and liked to read and see what advice people gave to others in similar situations.
Recommended Posts