Green eyes Posted August 20, 2007 Posted August 20, 2007 My manager and I have been attracted to eachother for a long time. Well, finally one night at a company outing, something happend between her and I. The story is we went out and partied like rockstars and ended up in bed with each other (bad bad bad). The "extremely drunk" sexual adventure started of great but ended up bad. I had, what they call as "whiskey dick". After many attempts at just trying to get it in. I had to give up. Talk about frustrating. The next day at work was rather awkward:confused:. I don't know what to do at this point. I want to def show her what I am all about when I'm not intoxicated but don't think she will give the chance. Has this whole thing just been screwed up or do I still have a shot boys and girls? If so what needs to happen??? I know the whole saying, "don't **** where you eat" that is not relative at this point in time haha.
ca2zs Posted August 20, 2007 Posted August 20, 2007 Now this is hilarious. Ahaha. Well, what I would probably try to do first is joke about it with her(in work probably wouldn't be the best place), and see where it takes you, I'm sure she probably doesn't care all to much if she really likes you, say something along the lines of "wow, I was so freaking drunk that night", if you are both adults about it, it shouldn't be such a bad thing. And you'll be able to continue what started elsewhere.
4Q2 Posted August 20, 2007 Posted August 20, 2007 Not relative! Now even more relative then ever! Do you value your job? If not, get a different one so it can continue I vote it's only going to get worse if you do continue. Damage control is in order. Always fish elsewhere.
Trialbyfire Posted August 20, 2007 Posted August 20, 2007 Okay, you have a problem. Your manager should have been a little more professional, since she's someone in a position of power, therefore this could be construed as abuse of such if your company has non-frat rules between mgmt and staff. Why not go in to see her, apologize to her about the too much whiskey thing but let her know you still find her attractive. If she's any kind of manager, she will turn you down in a professional manner. This way, you've given her back an illusion of control and dignity. If she takes you up on it, start looking for another job so if things progress or crash and burn, you won't be working together.
Touche Posted August 20, 2007 Posted August 20, 2007 Are you worried that you might be fired for poor performance?
Touche Posted August 20, 2007 Posted August 20, 2007 Was this the annual review? Did you mean "anal" review?
Trialbyfire Posted August 20, 2007 Posted August 20, 2007 Did you mean "anal" review? Haha...no. I don't think it was quite as specific as that, since there wasn't any...market depth...analysis.
Arizona100 Posted August 20, 2007 Posted August 20, 2007 lol! Ok, if it was me, I would give it another try, thats what I can tell you. I know men sometimes cant get it up when they are drunk. Why don't you try to ask her on a regular date? And when you think about it that's kind of a good thing because when you try again.. she'll go "wow!" haha
Author Green eyes Posted August 21, 2007 Author Posted August 21, 2007 Not relative! Now even more relative then ever! Do you value your job? If not, get a different one so it can continue I vote it's only going to get worse if you do continue. Damage control is in order. Always fish elsewhere. This is not relative because she is not my manager she is a manager on different team, she works on the other side of the office and shes hott! I dont think I can give up on this one. I have to at least show her how I roll. lol. So one more questions to those that think I should joke with her about the situation. How should I approach it. I dont want to just walk up and say, "That damn whiskey dick!" haha. On second thought that might work. Give me some input on approach. Thanks peeps!
Road Rage Posted August 21, 2007 Posted August 21, 2007 Yeah peeps, give him some input. About the only thing I can say is he seems to be holding onto a bladeless knife with no handle at the moment. I sure as heck wouldn`t joke about it though. I imagine she may be giving this thing a lot of thought. I think I would leave the word alcohol out of it entirely. If you blame anything on a state of intoxication, she may take that as saying you only slept with her because you were DRUNK.
Herzen Posted August 21, 2007 Posted August 21, 2007 There are two contexts here: the legal and the personal. Your OP concerns the personal, so I'll address that first. I wouldn't mention the sexual misadventure. Instead, let nature take its course: continue your friendship, flirtatiousness and hook-up again without the depressing and depressant effects of too much booze. If you focus on your performance, so will she. Let it go. As for the legal context, she's higher up the food chain, and assuming you're in the USA, the employer's at risk of a sexual harassment lawsuit in the event your relationship goes south and the bad blood boils over. Even apart from Title VII, your employer, for risk management and morale reasons, just might frown on work relationships between supervisors and non-supervisory employees. I'd let this one go: there are many more "fish" in the deep blue sea.
4Q2 Posted August 22, 2007 Posted August 22, 2007 Never risk your job for poon. To do otherwise is, uhh, stoopid! My advice is to let her approach you if she wants more and let her know you don't want to jeopardize your job any further.
Author Green eyes Posted August 22, 2007 Author Posted August 22, 2007 Never risk your job for poon. To do otherwise is, uhh, stoopid! My advice is to let her approach you if she wants more and let her know you don't want to jeopardize your job any further. In all actuality you are right dude. I need to be more responsible.
Reckless Posted August 22, 2007 Posted August 22, 2007 the s**t where you eat analogy still applies, most companies frown on interoffice romance especially when it involves those in a position of power.. anyhoo.... I don't think she is going to approach you; she is probably deeply deeply regretting what happened afterall she I presume was also drunk and drunk is not the best time to make decisions. I would try and be a grown up and if you really want to start something with her call her up and ask for (not another shot at the target... crass) but a date. If she thinks " this looser has GOT to be kidding..." she'll kiss you off with "now I'm sober I think we'd better leave it" If she thinks "hmm ... he is still cute without the beer-goggles" she'll say yes. Attractive professional women have no shortage of guys that want to get them into bed, unless you look, not like some flppant, joking, pathetic looser but a guy worth the time and risks involved, she will count her lucky stars she can use alchol as an excuse and blank you in the office...
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