Lizzie60 Posted August 19, 2007 Posted August 19, 2007 Just an update before I go to bed... LOL He lied to me. He told me he didn't have anyone... I've been seeing him for the last 2 years... Recently he's been closer than ever... coming over to my house unannounced... calling me more often... asking me to be his gf.. blablabla (I posted about him before)...anyway... he lied to me the sob. LOL Last time I saw him, he came in unannounced one afternoon, we had sex, we goofed around, it was fun... he said he wanted to be my bf... and that the ball was in my camp and he wanted me to think about it... I was curious... and said I wanted to see his new house. He said he would call me later that week and he would take me over. The next day, he called me and said that his cell phone was dead.. huh? WTF ...why the need to tell me that? I never call him anyway. so he told me that this girl had smashed his phone the night before... So I said 'I knew you had someone'.. he kept telling me she was just a friend... blablabla.. yeah right... I'm not stupid. I didn't have time to talk so the next day he left me a long message on my answering machine. He said that he was a lying jerk...that he had lied to me all that time, that this girl was his long time gf.. (they've been together 6 years) and they just moved together last December (when he bought the house)... that he would leave her for me in a second if I was much younger. He said he always loved older women.. that she was immature, excessively jealous and possessive.... blablabla The next day, he called again in the afternoon... saying that we wouldn't get together anymore... that his gf was sooo depressed and that she knew my name and my address (because of my phone no. on his cell)... I know she called me one day, because as soon as I picked up the phone this girl said 'oh sorry I got the wrong number'... He said to me that this A with me was his own fantasy world... that I was driving him crazy (sexually) that he wished I was younger.. that he wanted a woman like me... but he didn't want to hurt her anymore ...plus she would watch him from now on... he said 'The last 3 years has been f*cking bad with her'... I said why don't you leave her then... he said they are best friends, that she's perfect, except for the sex and the jealousy issue. We talked for a while.. he told me everything... I said 'why the need to lie to me' cause he knew I wasn't interested... He said he thought that if he had told me, I would have refused to see him... LOL... Weird cause he knew I was seeing other men and that they were married.... strange... Anyway... he said he would call me that same night, around supper time, cause she wanted him to call me in front of her to tell me he wouldn't come and change my counter... He told her we never had sex...and she believes him. He was convincing I guess. LOL... eventhough she knew he had called me many times after 11 pm... even after midnight on a few occasions. He didn't call that night... but called the next day... I was nice and said, 'fine XXXX no problem, I will call someone else, thanks for letting me know you can't do it'... so I guess that call reassured her. I haven't heard from him since.
Fun2BMe Posted August 19, 2007 Posted August 19, 2007 How many years younger is he? So you were only interested in him for the sex? I'm guessing that was the case since you never agreed to be his girlfriend when he kept asking you to be. Maybe that's why he decided to stick with his existing gf, considering you were seeing other men and never took up on his offer to be his. Do you feel hurt over it or you don't care? Maybe he was using you for sex and you were using him to do your counters? Maybe he didn't want to take on the counter project so made an excuse to leave suddenly?
Touche Posted August 19, 2007 Posted August 19, 2007 Maybe he was using you for sex and you were using him to do your counters? :lmao:
lovelorcet Posted August 19, 2007 Posted August 19, 2007 In principle... he is right... He is a young man with his life ahead of him, you are just too old, a nice fantasy but too old.
Trimmer Posted August 19, 2007 Posted August 19, 2007 Lizzie - in the recent past you don't seem to have placed much value or concern on honesty in the men you've been with. They lie every day about their other relationships, and you don't really care, as you "don't believe" in monogamy or marriage. Why is this one affecting you so much? Did you have more emotionally invested than you realized? Was it the comment about your age? It just seems like you usually let pretty much everything roll off you, but this one got under your skin...
Author Lizzie60 Posted August 19, 2007 Author Posted August 19, 2007 Lizzie - in the recent past you don't seem to have placed much value or concern on honesty in the men you've been with. They lie every day about their other relationships, and you don't really care, as you "don't believe" in monogamy or marriage. Why is this one affecting you so much? Did you have more emotionally invested than you realized? Was it the comment about your age? It just seems like you usually let pretty much everything roll off you, but this one got under your skin... Yes, I felt a little 'twitch' for the few days this lasted... especially when he left me that long message on my recorder.... I really liked him...but I wasn't in love for sure. He was a 'charmer' ... I know his style. He is addicted to sex and he doesn't get what he wants from his gf... because he works too much (long hours), etc. Five days later it just like I never met him... so I'm okay. LOL I bet he will be back... He's been with this girl for 6 years, has cheated 5 of those years ... they just moved together in December... they are planning to have kids, he told me.... so I don't think this girl will ever be happy with him. He even slept with her sister 5 years ago... she forgives him every time... I feel bad for her in a way because I know he will never stop cheating. He will just be careful for a while... but I know he will find a way to do it again.
Author Lizzie60 Posted August 19, 2007 Author Posted August 19, 2007 How many years younger is he? So you were only interested in him for the sex? I'm guessing that was the case since you never agreed to be his girlfriend when he kept asking you to be. Maybe that's why he decided to stick with his existing gf, considering you were seeing other men and never took up on his offer to be his. Do you feel hurt over it or you don't care? Maybe he was using you for sex and you were using him to do your counters? Maybe he didn't want to take on the counter project so made an excuse to leave suddenly? He is 25 years old... so 30 years younger. I don't know why he kept asking me that when he knew he wouldn't leave her... weird. but I guess he said I was his 'little secret garden' and he liked the fantasy. I am not stupid... I know a relationship with so much age difference can't logically works. Maybe that's why he decided to stick with his existing gf, considering you were seeing other men and never took up on his offer to be his. No, he knew he wouldn't leave her. He wants kids and she's his best friend. Maybe he was using you for sex and you were using him to do your counters? Maybe he didn't want to take on the counter project so made an excuse to leave suddenly? No, I was planning to pay him along with one of his work buddy. They both came to see me about it... But he told her that the only reason he was talking to me was because of the counter... It wasn't an excuse, I know he wanted to do it... but now that she will watch him like a hawk, he won't take a chance, and I can't wait much longer to have it replaced, as my house is for sale. But once I moved...he might call me back... cause she won't be able to find me... she knows where I live now.
Author Lizzie60 Posted August 19, 2007 Author Posted August 19, 2007 In principle... he is right... He is a young man with his life ahead of him, you are just too old, a nice fantasy but too old. This is exactly it. We both know it is 'impossible'. He kept saying that it sucks that the age gap is so big... LOL
playabum17 Posted August 19, 2007 Posted August 19, 2007 'The last 3 years has been f*cking bad with her'... I said why don't you leave her then... he said they are best friends, that she's perfect, except for the sex and the jealousy issue. We talked for a while.. he told me everything... Maybe things wouldn't be so bad with her if he wouldn't cheat on her... just a thought. She may be perfect, but he sure as hell isn't. I realize that isn't the point of your thread.
Yamaha Posted August 19, 2007 Posted August 19, 2007 The experience of an older women can be hypnotizing for a young man. He likes her because she is wise and knows what she wants and how to please him. She likes him because he is fun and very virile and she feels young being with him. They may even fall in-love but the age difference will always creep in and it will kill the relationship in the end.
Fun2BMe Posted August 19, 2007 Posted August 19, 2007 I've been in relationships with men 33-36 years older. I think if the issue of having children or sexual dysfunction is not involved then it can be an ideal situation, but if he has his 'real' honey and is looking for some action on the side with older/younger women then you have to be careful not to get your feelings hurt.
Trialbyfire Posted August 19, 2007 Posted August 19, 2007 A prime example of why not to put your hand into the company cookie jar. This is how you make money, lizzie. You can't afford to let feelings dominate any business decisions.
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