Lucky555 Posted August 18, 2007 Posted August 18, 2007 So i know by getting rid of a guy that is going now where in life right now, was the right decision. I dated this guy for a little over a month, met his family, friends, and found out what his life was like. Drinking, work, and weed. That just about sums up him for the most part. Hes the best when not doing those things but i can't make him stop doing what hes doing because its his choice. I drink only with friends or festivities, don't do drugs either. Anyways he has been pretty good at just being a person to say hi too. i sense that he is a little "rejected" and kind of upset but he still can bring himself to talk to me. Yesterday, he came to me and told me that he may never see me again after my last day of working so he was saying bye unless i went to one of his games this week. I told him i would go and it will be the last because i have classes soon. He tried to flirt with me and pick up the flirting too, which is what makes it hard to say goodbye to him because i care about him as a person and friend,I just ask myself "Why can't he be just him and none of those other factors?" But that is him, and i can't accept it. The fact he was "trying" to win me again is awful because he knows what the problems are and he just "won't change" Being with another person should bring happiness, love, and progression of a good relationship. This guy doesn't make me feel this way if any thing i feel bad because he is destroying himself and he has a kid that needs him. If i were his kid i wouldn't be happy with him and to see this breaks my heart. In the beginning it was attraction and i gave it a shot because you never know till you try. I tried and i gained a "friend" so it sucks how you think that wow this is going great till you see their true colors and ambitions. What i hate most was how he lied to get me to sleep with him....yeah i know this is what most guys do. He said so many things and thats why we lasted for over a month...fortunately i waited to see the real him and its not what i want. So This thursday is the final good bye. I don't think i even want to be friends with this guy but i am going to keep it civil. Like what would be the point hanging out with someone who throws their life away like this, and this is in my eyes because he has potential.
Capricciosa Posted August 18, 2007 Posted August 18, 2007 So i know by getting rid of a guy that is going now where in life right now, was the right decision. Being with another person should bring happiness, love, and progression of a good relationship. I don't think i even want to be friends with this guy but i am going to keep it civil. Like what would be the point hanging out with someone who throws their life away like this, and this is in my eyes because he has potential. No one ever said that the right thing would be easy. In the short run it is alway a bit painful in my experience. I've been with those type of guys too, too many times in my life, and I always got hooked on their potential. But what if if never emerges? And how long would one have to wait for it, and how frustrating would all that waiting be? And then you do the right thing, and you miss them. It's only natural, but it is short term pain as opposed to long term misery. Yes, it is supposed to feel good a good percentage of the time. And I think cutting off contact will help you let go and get on with your life. Attraction doesn't just go away, so it's good if there is no contact, so at least you don't have to be triggered and wonder and go through the short term pain all the time. Sorry you're bummed. It will go away in time. And though it took me a long time to come to this, I try not to sleep with people too soon as it muddles my judgement, attaches me to them before I know what they're made of. Hard, I know, but somewhat safer for my heart.
Author Lucky555 Posted August 18, 2007 Author Posted August 18, 2007 I didn't sleep with him but we were together alot of the course of a month. Hanging out at least twice a week, called me , text me, he wanted me as his girlfriend, and said he wanted me. but just bummed that it didn't work out. I did enjoy his company when he wasn't doing those other things drinking...mostly. I would meet him for coffee in the mornings before work and he would visit me at work also. Ehh got to move on and yes your right short term it hurts a bit but long term it would be miserable. Thanks for the support
Capricciosa Posted August 18, 2007 Posted August 18, 2007 Sounds to me like you'll be just fine. Go out with some friends, try to have some relaxed fun in the meanwhile.
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