spookie Posted August 18, 2007 Posted August 18, 2007 I feel like ever since my long-term relationship ended (into which I really put all of myself) I have had no idea about the kind of guy I want to date. I know the kind of love I want to have, but I'm starting to realize that, from the very start, I pick the wrong guys, passing over the ones that like and respect me for who I am in favor of the ones who make me feel insecure. In particular, I have a friend that I know would be perfect for me, if I would just let him. He is smart, caring, considerate, funny. He has been there for me from the very start, knows all my (many) crazy sides and isn't afraid. I know he's attracted to me, we have chemistry, and I think the sexual stuff would be amazing, if I would just let go. But (this is so shallow) he doens't fit the mold of the kind of guy I "want" to end up with: he is short ,I don't like his beard, and some things he does and says just turn me off (he is awkward). One part of me tells me to go for this, because it could (would) be amazing. The other part tells me to hold out for someone I find more attractive. I am trying to be honest with myself, but I am not proud of my superficiality. Rip me apart, but don't just tell me I am shallow.
Krytellan Posted August 18, 2007 Posted August 18, 2007 I would say don't go forward with this guy unless you are at least pretty sure you're interested. You can't go back and can ruin a good friendship if you start and stop. There's nothing wrong with physical barriers... we all have em. Don't force it. Especially out of desperation
lino Posted August 18, 2007 Posted August 18, 2007 I would say don't go forward with this guy unless you are at least pretty sure you're interested. You can't go back and can ruin a good friendship if you start and stop. There's nothing wrong with physical barriers... we all have em. Don't force it. Especially out of desperation I agree. I don't think there's anything wrong or superficial with what you're saying spookie. I have a female friend who I think is a great girl & would be a great partner for any guy. People always tell me I should marry her but I just don't find her attractive & I'd hate to 'force' myself to like her romantically and potentially ruin my very good friendship with her.
maynard Posted August 18, 2007 Posted August 18, 2007 unless you are shallow or the guy is butt ugly, your lack of attraction goes beyond the physical id like to give him some advice
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