DateAnalyzer Posted August 17, 2007 Posted August 17, 2007 Making everything sound good, your life, job, or sparetime activities. We all are so programmed to put a litttle twist on something about our life so that the other person willl accept us. And I just don;t have the mental energy to do it anymore. From here on out, i'm being upfront about my weight and life, it's just makes me feel retarded sometime to just put a pretty spin on everything. anyone agree?
directx Posted August 17, 2007 Posted August 17, 2007 Hell ya. I figured that out decades ago. Actually, I downplay everything, because if anyone still talks to me after I give them my worst, its easy street from there
Cobra_X30 Posted August 17, 2007 Posted August 17, 2007 Making everything sound good, your life, job, or sparetime activities. We all are so programmed to put a litttle twist on something about our life so that the other person willl accept us. And I just don;t have the mental energy to do it anymore. From here on out, i'm being upfront about my weight and life, it's just makes me feel retarded sometime to just put a pretty spin on everything. anyone agree? Is it really that difficult to make your life sound good? You shouldnt have to spin anything at all! If you dont like your life, why would you want to share the misery?
jcster Posted August 17, 2007 Posted August 17, 2007 Those spin jobs don't fool anyone for very long. It's not worth the energy.
Author DateAnalyzer Posted August 17, 2007 Author Posted August 17, 2007 Is it really that difficult to make your life sound good? You shouldnt have to spin anything at all! If you dont like your life, why would you want to share the misery? I like my life but a female back in march stopped talking to me because she got the vibe that I didn;t go outdoors much and decided not to meet me. So I guess I'm supposed to just lie my ass off when a female says-"what do u like to do for fun? I like to go scuba diving on saturday afternoons
Krytellan Posted August 17, 2007 Posted August 17, 2007 I like my life but a female back in march stopped talking to me because she got the vibe that I didn;t go outdoors much and decided not to meet me. So I guess I'm supposed to just lie my ass off when a female says-"what do u like to do for fun? I like to go scuba diving on saturday afternoons Umm... or try being honest about the fact so you don't waste your time with outdoorsy people.
Author DateAnalyzer Posted August 17, 2007 Author Posted August 17, 2007 Umm... or try being honest about the fact so you don't waste your time with outdoorsy people. she didn't know that the purpose of talking to her was so that i could GET OUTDOORS
Cobra_X30 Posted August 17, 2007 Posted August 17, 2007 I like my life but a female back in march stopped talking to me because she got the vibe that I didn;t go outdoors much and decided not to meet me. So I guess I'm supposed to just lie my ass off when a female says-"what do u like to do for fun? I like to go scuba diving on saturday afternoons Oh... DA man! You need to get a bottle of pimp juice or something! No be honest with the girl. This one just wasnt worth your time. Shoot that really just sounds like she wasnt bieng honest with you about why she wasnt interested.
Author DateAnalyzer Posted August 17, 2007 Author Posted August 17, 2007 Oh... DA man! You need to get a bottle of pimp juice or something! No be honest with the girl. This one just wasnt worth your time. Shoot that really just sounds like she wasnt bieng honest with you about why she wasnt interested. this was the problem and I think why she was turned off 1. I always wanted to talk longer when she was ready to hang up 2. I was always available when she called 3. I never talkd about my male friends 4. I never talked about where I went with friends
Trialbyfire Posted August 17, 2007 Posted August 17, 2007 DA, getting a girl through dishonesty whether it's by omission isn't going to make her stay once she finds out you're a fraud. If she's wandered away due to incompatibility, it's okay.
Cobra_X30 Posted August 17, 2007 Posted August 17, 2007 DA, getting a girl through dishonesty whether it's by omission isn't going to make her stay once she finds out you're a fraud. If she's wandered away due to incompatibility, it's okay. Hey, I think the issue is not that he is dishonest... its just he is not showing his positive attributes. I have a wonderful idea... why don't you tell him what would work on you? What makes you interested! ;)
Author DateAnalyzer Posted August 17, 2007 Author Posted August 17, 2007 DA, getting a girl through dishonesty whether it's by omission isn't going to make her stay once she finds out you're a fraud. If she's wandered away due to incompatibility, it's okay. No it's not dishonesty, Basically it's me trying to get the date. A phone conversation before a blind date is important because i have to show that I'm MEETABLE. Which is why I decided now to only talk for 20 min very other night until the actual first date. No more chatting on the phone for 2 hours unless it's about fetishes
Trialbyfire Posted August 17, 2007 Posted August 17, 2007 No it's not dishonesty, Basically it's me trying to get the date. A phone conversation before a blind date is important because i have to show that I'm MEETABLE. Which is why I decided now to only talk for 20 min very other night until the actual first date. No more chatting on the phone for 2 hours unless it's about fetishes You know what your problem is DA? You don't have any respect for women. We're people who have emotions and can be intellectual, some more than others. If you can't view a woman as a person, instead of an object, you're going to strike out everytime for anything meaningful. If you don't care for quality, then shoot for the base-born but don't complain if they use you back.
Author DateAnalyzer Posted August 17, 2007 Author Posted August 17, 2007 You know what your problem is DA? You don't have any respect for women. We're people who have emotions and can be intellectual, some more than others. If you can't view a woman as a person, instead of an object, you're going to strike out everytime for anything meaningful. If you don't care for quality, then shoot for the base-born but don't complain if they use you back. why do you say i don;t have respect for women?
Trialbyfire Posted August 17, 2007 Posted August 17, 2007 why do you say i don;t have respect for women? No more chatting on the phone for 2 hours unless it's about fetishes You always look for the sexual return, as if every one of your minutes is so precious that you can't enjoy a chat with a woman. It's called socializing, even if it doesn't get you "bang for the buck", ya' know?
Author DateAnalyzer Posted August 17, 2007 Author Posted August 17, 2007 You always look for the sexual return, as if every one of your minutes is so precious that you can't enjoy a chat with a woman. It's called socializing, even if it doesn't get you "bang for the buck", ya' know? I was just saying by shortening my calls with a female I think is girlfriend material, that will eliminate me being annoyed if she clicks over and says can i call you bacK? or click over and not click back over at all. So i think the shorter the better. I want a female to think I'm busy and in demand even though that's so far away from the truth-lol
Trialbyfire Posted August 17, 2007 Posted August 17, 2007 I was just saying by shortening my calls with a female I think is girlfriend material, that will eliminate me being annoyed if she clicks over and says can i call you bacK? or click over and not click back over at all. So i think the shorter the better. I want a female to think I'm busy and in demand even though that's so far away from the truth-lol If you want a woman of substance, no games. You go after her and let her know she's your priority. If she responds with the same kind of attention, you've got it made. Keep in mind that if she's not interested, she will also let you know decisively. If you want a little girl, princess or wack-job, by all means, play games.
Author DateAnalyzer Posted August 17, 2007 Author Posted August 17, 2007 If you want a woman of substance, no games. You go after her and let her know she's your priority. If she responds with the same kind of attention, you've got it made. Keep in mind that if she's not interested, she will also let you know decisively. If you want a little girl, princess or wack-job, by all means, play games. Well that's why I was so surprised in july because I didn;t know women 29 and over played games. For that girl to pretend she liked me back in mid july and compliment me on the date was the meanest thing a female ever did to me since I started dating at 21. Life was so much better when I wasn't into girls. It's a shame i can never go back to those days
Trialbyfire Posted August 17, 2007 Posted August 17, 2007 Well that's why I was so surprised in july because I didn;t know women 29 and over played games. For that girl to pretend she liked me back in mid july and compliment me on the date was the meanest thing a female ever did to me since I started dating at 21. Life was so much better when I wasn't into girls. It's a shame i can never go back to those days You can't bracket people by age. It's by maturity level. I've had the experience of the flakiest guy I've ever met and he was in his late thirties. I've also had to wade through a lot of not worthwhile men. Don't give up but if you feel a little burnt out, take a break from dating and focus on improving yourself, in the ways that you're dissatisfied with yourself. One small fix at a time. In improving yourself, you stand a better chance of snagging someone worthwhile. Do you understand what I mean?
Author DateAnalyzer Posted August 17, 2007 Author Posted August 17, 2007 You can't bracket people by age. It's by maturity level. I've had the experience of the flakiest guy I've ever met and he was in his late thirties. I've also had to wade through a lot of not worthwhile men. Don't give up but if you feel a little burnt out, take a break from dating and focus on improving yourself, in the ways that you're dissatisfied with yourself. One small fix at a time. In improving yourself, you stand a better chance of snagging someone worthwhile. Do you understand what I mean? Yeah That's why I decided to date again in October
Beauty28 Posted August 26, 2007 Posted August 26, 2007 I hear ya! I have that same feeling. It seems like everytime I find someone I like they lose interest. So should I play the age old dating games.... Do this.... but don't do this.....? I mean come on!!! It gets old sometimes. Ya know? So I'm at the point where I want to be by myself. People keep telling me that dating is suppose to be fun. But so far it hasn't been for me.
Lady Aurora Posted August 26, 2007 Posted August 26, 2007 Screw the games. The most important thing you can do is to be yourself and be happy with yourself. If you can't like yourself for who you are, how can you ever expect someone else to? Don't try so hard. If these girls aren't into you, then they are just not the right one. Next.
monkey00 Posted August 27, 2007 Posted August 27, 2007 Let me jump in here and play devil's advocate for a second here. It sounds to me that his arguing point is an attempt to keep things interesting when he's dating a girl or he's met a girl. There's nothing wrong with that in initial dating (keeping things short and sweet), until, that is she becomes your gf. Rather than pretend that you're busy, why not truly keep yourself busy so you wont have to lie if a girl asks why you didnt pick up the phone, or why the date only lasts less than an hour. And then gradually work your way to investing more of your time into a possible relationship. As for 'misery loves company', most people are interested in people who have a positive outlook on life. Whether or not you put a twist on your life, if you're not happy with your life what makes you think you're going to be happy in a relationship?
Green Posted August 27, 2007 Posted August 27, 2007 First off yes its a bad idea to talk on the phone for hours to a girl you havnt met yet. You dont need to lie or make your life sound more interesting just be honest and posotive about what ever you say. If you want to get girls you need to work on the things you want in life. Say you always wanted to "blank" then you need to work toward "blank" then when girls meet you and see you were a guy who wanted "blank" and you either have "blank" or your working toward "blank" ull inspire them and turn them on or what ever. And stop relying so much on the blind dates try flirting and asking out girls you meet in person say at things ur involved in, out on the town what ever.
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