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Is it a good idea...?


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Posted

To be unavailable sometimes when trying to pursue a man? Do that really make men want you more? Hmmm...any advice would be good, but esp. mens! :p I just want to know if the mysterious, not too easy to capture **** actually works?! And this guy is my friend, BTW.

Posted

depends on well you execute it & the guy's nature.

if he just is your friend, how does being unavailable help ?

Posted

What does it mean to pursue a man? A man should be the pursuer.

Posted

Did you mean how to react to a man who is pursuing you? If that is what you meant then acting a bit unavailable would be good. Like Poboy said - you gotta know how to execute it.. and execute it well. You gotta know to play the game...

 

But if you're pursuing him... I would advice you to errmm... stop. Why pursue a man? It should be the other way around. I like to be pursued and romanced.. I'm very sure most women here like the same.

Posted

If you want something worthwhile with him immature games are not the way to go.

Posted

Being unavailable works best after the relationship has gone past the physical level.Does not work well during the pursuit,it makes women come off as "flakey".

Posted

Being unavailable on purpose might be a good strategy, because it gives him time to shop around with other pursuits.

 

He could either find someone better or discover that he is lucky to have you.

 

Works both ways.

Posted

never had a problem whether or not i play the game. either way, it always work for me. :)

Posted
Being unavailable on purpose might be a good strategy, because it gives him time to shop around with other pursuits.

 

He could either find someone better or discover that he is lucky to have you.

 

Works both ways.

 

i agree! ;):bunny:

Posted

I really must protest to this notion that the man must always be the pursuer and the woman the pursued. It seems a little caveman to me. It's 2007!!! Girls can pursue, just don't come off desperate or obsessive. No one likes that, male or female.

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Posted

Erm...not being funny but...why can't a woman persue a man? :confused: What kinda world are you lot living in?? The guy should just do all the work? That's weird, IMO. A relationship should be 50/50 right? So why not the first part? Like somebody else said...this is 2007, lol.

 

And yes, he is my friend, but I obviously want more...and I'm not sure what he wants, but I think he wants more too. I was just wondering if it's a good idea to not always be there when he's expecting me too. I'm not talking standing him up, but in a social situation where are other friends will be there too?

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Posted
If you want something worthwhile with him immature games are not the way to go.

 

Don't agree. In the ideal world, yeah. But this is real life, huni and if you don't play a few games you get eaten alive, 'cause other buggers do! I'm not talking about being horrible or anything, but you need to be clever about things. I don't see how being less available is playing childish games. It's just letting them miss you, and wonder where you are...in a good way.

Posted

So if you want to pursue him, you should play the male role. And that means initiating contact, and confessing to him about what you feel and asking him about what he feels. Dissapearing is not persuing, that's trying to make him persue you. The problem with that is, men like to be in charge, they like to be a hunter, not a trophy. I think people's basic psychology doesn't change, it was the same a hundred and a thousand years ago.

Posted
Don't agree. In the ideal world, yeah. But this is real life, huni and if you don't play a few games you get eaten alive, 'cause other buggers do! I'm not talking about being horrible or anything, but you need to be clever about things. I don't see how being less available is playing childish games. It's just letting them miss you, and wonder where you are...in a good way.

 

If I have to play games I would rather be alone.

Posted
If I have to play games I would rather be alone.

I agree 100%. It messes with both your minds. I was just saying this to another member this afternoon. Boys play games and men know what they want and go get it. The guy I'm currently dating is like that. We went out last night and he wasn't ashamed to try and set something up today. I wanted to slow it down a bit so refused for today. He called again today to tell me he was thinking about me. What an absolute sweetheart. I'll be calling him tomorrow to set something up where we can slot it in the next day or so, depending on schedules. :love:

Posted

Girls also play games while women go for what they want. It seems that people in their 30s and 40s are playing games that I left behind in my early 20s.

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