heartoutside Posted August 11, 2007 Posted August 11, 2007 How do I know if this girl was just being friendly or was flirting? I know what flirting is, and it wasn't all out flirting, but it was something. But she acted the same (kind of) twds her good guy friends. This was the first time she and I ever hung out, so it would seem odd to me to be treating me like a guy friend....no? So the other night I went out for a friend B-day party at a buddies bar. I get there and see that my friend is sitting with a very attractive girl. There isn't any room in the booth, so she moves over to make room for me (while my other girl/friend didnt move over at all). I've meet this girl maybe once or twice before years ago when my buddie and I were roommates. But back then she has brown hair and it was longer. I guess she recently had it cute and highlighted and it looked good. So then her brother shows up with his girlfriend and I have to move in closer in the booth and basically have to put my arm around her (on the booth). And for the rest of the time at the bar she and I are very close to each other, she leans in from time to time very close to show me pictures on her camera, touchs my arm. I finally have to the bathroom so end up loosing my spot next to her. But when I return she and I exchange a few glances, and I then go up into the DJ booth to hang out with my buddie and play some songs and I notice that she is looking up in the booth a few times. Then her roommate shows up, he's a guy and her best friend (he's also in a relationship) and she's talk to him instantly, and taking pictures with him. We then decide to go to another bar and on the way over she's taking pictures of her and her roommate while he's driving so she's leaning in etc etc. and while walking up to the bar they walk arm in arm. So I'm starting to wonder if she's just overly touchy and friendly. We then get inside and I make sure I"m sitting next to her again, but I don't put my stool too close, kind of at the cornor of the table. I make a funny joke about a guy everyone was teasing her about and she jokingly says, "i'm mad at you, we're not talking." and then slapps me. Then my buddie's ex shows up, and this girl hates this other girl, so she grabs my stool and pulls me right next to her. She says so this girl can't come over to talk to her. I then get up to go to the bathroom both as a joke and because I have to...and she starts saying no, where are you going, don't go. I get back and she slaps my arm and rubs it. Anyway for the rest of the night, she and I are basically right next to each other, arms touching. She keeps leaning in to show me pictures of our friend that I've already seen. And then her roommate and her decide to go. The get up and I say you guys can't leave, you're going to leave me here....and they yeah, sorry. But then I notice that this girl is standing there waiting for a hug from me. I didn't notice so she say, "um, goodnight heartoutside." And I say, oh I'm sorry and I give her a nice hug and say have a goodnight and I'll you later. And that was that. Later that night, my buddie says he's going to a BBQ on sunday and asks if I want to go. I ask is she going to be there? I don't remember her being so cute. And he replies, no she won't be there, but I've been after that forever, but I think you have a better chance. So who knows, he said he would work on it for me. But I'm think I should just call her. I didn't get her number, I can easily. So my question is, was she flirting or was she just acting like I was just one of the boys like she was doing with her roommate and my buddie? I suck on first dates, I get totally nervous, I'm much better in group situations where it isn't loud (that's why I can't pick girls up in bars). Any suggestions, or advice?
AngryHeartache Posted August 12, 2007 Posted August 12, 2007 Well, sorry but...if she is treating other giys the same way, she's either generally flirty, or that's just her way of being friendly. If a girl, or guy, is interesed in you, they will treat you differently to other people. Even if they flirt with other people to try and catch your attention, make you jealous, whatever...they will still treat you differently. Know what I mean? I can only say my opinion based on what I just read...so you never know, I could be totally wrong, so don't just give uo hope. If you like her, get to know her, and see where it goes from there! I wouldn't advise getting her number off somebody else though, nuh uh...no way. A lot of girls would find that kind of stakerish and a turn-off I think. Instead, if you don't see her often...get your friends to arrange some get together. A party or something...get them to get her to come along. Make lots of conversation with her, get to know her a bit, and see what happens there. If you still like her, then YOU ask HER for her number at the end of the night. I think it's a big wrong move to ask a friend for it, personally. Good luck
squeak Posted August 12, 2007 Posted August 12, 2007 You are confused because she does that with everyone, right? Now say you were going out with her one day, and you see her still putting her arm through her best (male) friends, and touching Ken's arm, and sitting too close to Joe, they all start wondering if your girlfriend likes them too. See where I'm going with this? Who knows at this point if you are special or not, because she does that with everyone. That won't change if you ever become BF and GF. Cool your jets and think about if you want to be *that* guy who everyone wonders if his GF really likes him or all the guys she is rubbing on. She won't change that behavior. Your choice.
Author heartoutside Posted August 12, 2007 Author Posted August 12, 2007 Well, she's been best friends with her roommate for some 10 years, I've only known her for 10hours... The other guy, my old roommate, she wasn't really reacting to him like she was with her good friend. When they took pictures of the bunch of them, sure they would have their arms around each other, but when she and I were sitting in the booth, she could have been leaning in on my buddie who was on the other side of her, she wasn't.....she was leaning in on me, touching my leg or touch'n my arm. I will play it by ear, I guess. I've only hung out with her with 2 of her best guy friends, each of whom she treats differently. I would have to see how see acts around other people (guys) as I guess.
squeak Posted August 12, 2007 Posted August 12, 2007 Would you say her best friend and you are better looking then your old roommate and the "non-leaned on buddy" of yours? I knew a girl like this, she was always extra extra touchy and flirty depending on how good looking a guy was, regardless of her BF seeing or not. I always thought he ended up looking like a chump, and I wondered why he got involved with her and what lies he had to tell himself to accept she really preferred him over the others.. I guess when you like someone you want to overlook these things, (not saying you) , but just observe that all a bit more.
Author heartoutside Posted August 12, 2007 Author Posted August 12, 2007 Not to sound cocky, but I would say I'm better looking then both... But I understand what you're getting at......
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