sunshine79 Posted August 9, 2007 Posted August 9, 2007 i'm in such a bad mood today, i keep getting bombarded at work and 2 times today i got bombarded and did what was needed but forgot one thing on each...tha'ts made me in worse of a mood. 2 screw ups in one day?!?! ugh i am so annoyed with everything and i don't know why. am i mad at myself and this is how i'm taking it out?? my fiance's uncle is dying, he's going to see him on his lunchy break but i cant'. i have to stay at work. i haven't seen my fiance's family in 2 months and he hasn't in one month and i'm afraid to see them. last time i talked to his mom we had gotten into a humongous fight and he went to talk to her probably telling her things taht weren't true because he was mad so now what does she think of the woman her last son is going to marry?? i'm not like his sister or his sisternlaw...i don't call them, i'm not going to be buddy buddy like they are. that's not me. i think sometimes he wants me to be like that buti 'm not. never will be. should this concern me that he may get upset about it?? i'm confused and annoyed and just in a bad mood...i could even cry right now!!!! grrrr i want to go home!!
LoveLace Posted August 9, 2007 Posted August 9, 2007 I"m feelin' ya. Why would he tell your MNL things that are not true? Does he habitually side with her over you? A girl I work with is having that problem...her man never sticks up for her. Maybe when things are cooled off, all 3 of you could sit and talk calmly?...You don't have to kiss butt necessarily, just seek compromise?...if that applies to what ever is going on... I hate when I make mistakes at work too. It's ok. Everyone has an off-day. Can you step outside for a few minutes or take a break? Well, at least you can vent here as much as you want.
Author sunshine79 Posted August 9, 2007 Author Posted August 9, 2007 you're right, atleast i have here! whew!! i'm just really frustrated. i had forgotten all about mnl and having to see her again and with his uncle not doing good i guess that i know i'll see her soon. i just dont' want her to believe him and parto f me knows she doesn't but another part questions it. i did write his sister an email after she wrote me asking how i was doing. i told her better and that fiance and i had a good talk and came to an understanding/compromise nad thigns were good but i told her i felt like he was taking his feelings of being overweight and putting them on something else nad what better person but me! take the spotlight off of him. also his fam called out his weight gain so maybe tha's another reason that i was 'best choice' to him. so i explained that to the sister and she never wrote me back. granted she's a school teacher so she was leaving that week so maybe she didn't have time to respond or maybe she didn't get it or maybe she got it and agreed and didn't feel need to respond. i don't know. i just hope she does believe me and not her brother, she knows how he can be a ball of fire nad like to place blame where blame doesn't belong. do you think the mnl will go with everythign her baby boy says or be a little more wiser??? i'm so nervous. oh and the snl and sis are buddy buddy with mnl so that makes it even more nerve wracking. i just hope they believe me.
LoveLace Posted August 9, 2007 Posted August 9, 2007 Have you ever let him know that he's making you feel this way? You wouldn't have to mention the weight gain, but maybe just say that you feel like he's purposely trying to make you look bad sometimes, and its effecting your ability to get along well with his family. Chances are the sister will consider what you told her and maybe even relay that to the others. Ask her if they have any good ideas for helping him or intervening on him. He's probably feeling insecure about himself if he's gained a significant amount of weight. Insecurity is usually what prompts one to blame others for things, from what I gather. I'd still try talking with him 1st though.
Author sunshine79 Posted August 10, 2007 Author Posted August 10, 2007 since this happened 2 months ago i'm kinda nervous to bring it up. since then we started working out 3-4 nights a week together and he's lost prob 15 lbs in that amount of time. it's helping his insecurities i believe. as for the sister, when he has had his moments (when his dad died and when he lost his job) and was going through stress is what i mean. his sister always took my side, understood when he would get mad at something and take it out on whatever that there was always something underlying. he never blamed me then. now i feel like the blame was placed on me, i wonder if his sister took my email and did relay it and did believe me or are they believing him?? i see his mom tomorrow and i don't know waht to do. act normal? distant? ugh i'm gonig to be so uncomfortable. who's to say a mother doesn't always take her son's side...especially with him teh youngest and last one to marry...ugh...
Cobra_X30 Posted August 10, 2007 Posted August 10, 2007 Sunshine, Fiance should never ever take stress out on you. I know some poeple who do this, it is very hard on those who love them. If I could talk to him, I would set his butt straight! You dont go complain about your fiance to your bloody family! Ughhh... Dont get me wrong, he seems like a good guy, just has some issues with emotional maturity. Best of Luck to you! Hope your day goes well today.
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