yergawd Posted August 4, 2007 Posted August 4, 2007 I've looked at some of the old posts and it's a reoccuring theme, men do like porn. Water is wet...blah blah blah... Enough said. I received my last issues of Penthouse last night. It is my last one because I cancelled my subscription when my girlfriend and I became serious. Well with lag in cancelling the subscription and change of address it arrived in her (now our) mailbox. She freaked out and we had a long talk last night. I told her I don't need porn and honestly could care less about it. I have even gone as far as to tell my best friend that I will throw his bachelor party and get everything ready, but will not be there because being there is not worth it to me, if it is going to make her uncomfortable (Yeah he had some choice words, but eh whatever). I can't seem to impress upon her I am not a porn addict and I don't need it. She constantly says she worries about me going on line or buying porn again if we get into an argument. I don't know how to get through to her any suggestions?
Lizzie60 Posted August 4, 2007 Posted August 4, 2007 I've looked at some of the old posts and it's a reoccuring theme, men do like porn. Water is wet...blah blah blah... Enough said. I received my last issues of Penthouse last night. It is my last one because I cancelled my subscription when my girlfriend and I became serious. Well with lag in cancelling the subscription and change of address it arrived in her (now our) mailbox. She freaked out and we had a long talk last night. I told her I don't need porn and honestly could care less about it. I have even gone as far as to tell my best friend that I will throw his bachelor party and get everything ready, but will not be there because being there is not worth it to me, if it is going to make her uncomfortable (Yeah he had some choice words, but eh whatever). I can't seem to impress upon her I am not a porn addict and I don't need it. She constantly says she worries about me going on line or buying porn again if we get into an argument. I don't know how to get through to her any suggestions? I'm afraid you'll need a lot of patience with a gf like that... My feeling is that she is a 'control freak' and no matter what you say or do... she won't believe you... To cancel your plans with your friends, is, IMO, very immature and submissive... But, I know, you feel very much in love, NOW... but when the passion eventually fades away.. and then... oup pelaye... it's not as much fun anymore.. Oh well...your life, your choice.
Author yergawd Posted August 4, 2007 Author Posted August 4, 2007 I agree she does of have a controlling side. I do not hesitate to call her out on it either and she knows I won't put up with controlling behavior. She has trust issues, she deels porn, strip clubs etc... are another form of cheating. My thing is I have never been that big on porn and dislike strip clubs. So for me to give up something I don't really care about is no big deal. As far as not being at my bestfriends bachelor party... yeah it sucks but at the same time the only reason I would go is for my friend so we are going on a few day party rock climbing, camping, four wheeling. To me the bachelor party is not important.
Lizzie60 Posted August 4, 2007 Posted August 4, 2007 I agree she does of have a controlling side. I do not hesitate to call her out on it either and she knows I won't put up with controlling behavior. She has trust issues, she deels porn, strip clubs etc... are another form of cheating. My thing is I have never been that big on porn and dislike strip clubs. So for me to give up something I don't really care about is no big deal. As far as not being at my bestfriends bachelor party... yeah it sucks but at the same time the only reason I would go is for my friend so we are going on a few day party rock climbing, camping, four wheeling. To me the bachelor party is not important. You are throwing this bachelor party for your best friend... but you won't go because she has issues with it... and you say it 'sucks'... and it's not that important... sorry... dude I don't buy that. My best friend, IMO, will always be more important to me, because true friendship outlives any other relationships... but hey, if you think she'll be mad and won't get over it.. it's your choice to 'listen' to her... but I don't agree... but it's your choice... right?
T-town Posted August 4, 2007 Posted August 4, 2007 You're not going to go to your BEST friends bachlor party because of this?!! Wow, buddy you need to grow a pair and ur girl needs to ge a grip. If my best friend missed my bachlor party cause of his girlfriend, i doubt we would be best friends much longer.
Lizzie60 Posted August 4, 2007 Posted August 4, 2007 You're not going to go to your BEST friends bachlor party because of this?!! Wow, buddy you need to grow a pair and ur girl needs to ge a grip. If my best friend missed my bachlor party cause of his girlfriend, i doubt we would be best friends much longer. This is exactly how I feel... sorry for this poor guy....
T-town Posted August 4, 2007 Posted August 4, 2007 I agree she does of have a controlling side. I do not hesitate to call her out on it either and she knows I won't put up with controlling behavior. She has trust issues, she deels porn, strip clubs etc... are another form of cheating. My thing is I have never been that big on porn and dislike strip clubs. So for me to give up something I don't really care about is no big deal. As far as not being at my bestfriends bachelor party... yeah it sucks but at the same time the only reason I would go is for my friend so we are going on a few day party rock climbing, camping, four wheeling. To me the bachelor party is not important. Sounds like you do put up with her controling behavior. And last time I checked the bachlor party is supposed to be important to the bachelor, i bet its prolly pretty important to him that his best friend be there.
Author yergawd Posted August 4, 2007 Author Posted August 4, 2007 Wait, if you look back at the original post we live together, this is not someone that I am casually dating. She has her boundaries that I respect and she respects mine. I am going on a weekend get away with my friends. Not going to watch some strippers shake their asses while a bunch of guys stuff money in their g-string means I need to grow a pair? I am not the type to choose between friends and relationships. I have a balanced life, and my friends are a huge part of that life. I came up with a compromise where I will be giving him basically a second party doing the kind of stuff that we enjoy. WTF
T-town Posted August 4, 2007 Posted August 4, 2007 Wait, if you look back at the original post we live together, this is not someone that I am casually dating. She has her boundaries that I respect and she respects mine. I am going on a weekend get away with my friends. Not going to watch some strippers shake their asses while a bunch of guys stuff money in their g-string means I need to grow a pair? I am not the type to choose between friends and relationships. I have a balanced life, and my friends are a huge part of that life. I came up with a compromise where I will be giving him basically a second party doing the kind of stuff that we enjoy. WTF I got the part where you live together, I went to a bachelor party 2 weekends ago where almost everybody that was there was married! And not one of them asked if they could go, and their wives never would expect them to ask. To me THATS a healthy relatonship.Id totally understand if you were a strip club regular and ur gf wanted u to give that up...to me a bachelor party is something totally different. It really is the only time i ever go to strip clubs, and i really just enjoy drinking with my buddies and watching them act like idiots...I dont even really participate. Whatever, if ur happy do what you want...it sounds liek a pretty sh*tty thing to do to me, but i dont know u or ur friends so only u can decide if its the right thing to do.
Ruby Posted August 4, 2007 Posted August 4, 2007 I agree that you are not being a good friend and also that your girlfriend's insecurity will eventually split you two up anyway unless you 'grow a pair' - Then you will need your friends but will they be there? Girls come and go, friends are for life!
Krytellan Posted August 4, 2007 Posted August 4, 2007 I agree she does of have a controlling side. I do not hesitate to call her out on it either and she knows I won't put up with controlling behavior. Sorry, I have to back up T-Town. You Are in fact putting up with her controlling behavior, as evidenced by canceling the Playboy and not going to the bachelor party. You're signing your own unhappiness here. You can "call" it what you want, but it smells of doing things because you're afraid your gf will freak on you if you don't.
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