GrUmPy1 Posted August 4, 2007 Posted August 4, 2007 for almost four years now john and i dated. he asked me to marry him under no pressure by me im only 22 and so we became engaged. we talked bout our wedding and our future kids ya we had problems but i had no i dea it was this big. ok let me back up one of the major prob we had was that i caught him smoking weed and ever since then i havent been able to trust him he also used to drink behind my back- i didnt like when he drank because he's an angry drunk- so i was always asking him were u smoking? were u drinking? lemme smell ur breath things like that so basically trust was an issue- were another big problem is that he isnt considerate, he doesnt think of my feelings like i would for him. even tho we still would talk about our wedding and were happy for the most part then two weeks ago out of nowwhere i came home from work and went to give him a kiss he blew his breath in my face and said here smell it i know you want to. i told him i just wanted to kiss you hello and he yelled ya well u know u were going to anyway. then the argument escaleted from there and he endedup leaving me he said because he didnt want to answer to anyone he didnt want to get married or have kids he didnt want a relationship and he just wants to drink whenever and how much ever and go out with his friends he just literrally thru all that at me and i didnt even know where that came from he cussed at me he yeled at me he told me he didnt love me he told me its gonna hurt but get over it. your not gonna die over it. and more hurtful things like that he didnt talk to me for like a day n a half maybe two and all the while he treated me like the four years never happend like he hadnt lovedme for along time then on the 3rd day we started talking but he still kept saying i dont want to listen to you i dont want a relationship but me being stubborn and not understanding i still went outside when he was outside -oh yea were neighbors- i cried so much i couldnt get out of bed, i didnt go to work, i didnt eat, i lost 12 pounds in 4 days i made myself sick i had to go to the doctor so anyways people used to tell me dont let him see u like this because then he'll know he has you so i actd brave one nite when we talked and the following morning he called me talking about i cant leave you im sorry for what i said ur a good woman i love you things like that i told him not to say things he didnt mean and that he was so adamant about not being with me the nite before and now he loves me again-oh all the while while im dying inside he's out with his friends and getting drunk all the time, so the cylce continues for like 3 days where hes mean to me at nite then he crys to me on the phone that he's a dick and he s sorry and he cant leave me so my dumbass took him back but he says he still wants to do what he wants to do which is drink when ever and how much ever he wants and go where he pleases when he pleases my dumbass so in love said i would give it at try. were back together but things are not the same he doesnt care about anything anymore he's SUPER mean if i even agitate him alittle he says its over- walks away talks **** then were ok again.hes not even affectionate well he still kisses me but he dosnt hug me or hold my hand or touch me gently and when i do that and he's been drinking he snaps at me why do u have to be all up on me- i know im making him sound mean and he is but also i know he loves me he's just always been the type of guy who doesnt share his feelings when he's mad he says things he dosnt mean or acts in ways he doesnt mean but they were never serious now the things hes doing i NEVER would have thought he would act like this i feel like i dont even know him, i keep hoping that whatever hes going thru he realizes that im a good woman and i deserve to be treated right. i even blamed myself for things going wrong and thats one thing he's never said bad about me hes always said i didnt do anything wrong he just dosnt want to deal wit things anymore i guess my question is do u guys think we will change? do you think he got scared about commitement- whats wrong with him? whats going on with him? why is he being like this iam so inlove with him for better or worse and i feel like i should stik by him or these 4 years were wasted . OH ONE OTHER THING ITS NOT ANOTHER GIRL SERIOUSLY IM NOT BEING NAIVE ITS NOT ANOTHER GIRL I KNOW THAT FOR SURE.
Krytellan Posted August 4, 2007 Posted August 4, 2007 Ugh, please use paragraphs, punctuation, and capitals. It's difficult for these aged eyes of 33 years to focus on this large block of letters. And when did "u" become a word? I'm sorry, I know this comes off as insulting, I just can't help it. I'd like to contribute to your post, but I gave up after the first string of 100 letters. Others probably do too. If you want people to take this seriously, take your own writing seriously. Just some constructive advice.
Author GrUmPy1 Posted September 2, 2007 Author Posted September 2, 2007 wtf? i didnt know we were in school. this is a place to get advise not criticism on how we post. this is a serious post and because its not written to UR liking (yes ur is a word on the internet just like U, learn the lingo old man) you have to insult me and not offer advise. i think its pretty lame that you even took the time to post that. get over it.
ahah2322 Posted September 2, 2007 Posted September 2, 2007 wtf? i didnt know we were in school. this is a place to get advise not criticism on how we post. this is a serious post and because its not written to UR liking (yes ur is a word on the internet just like U, learn the lingo old man) you have to insult me and not offer advise. i think its pretty lame that you even took the time to post that. get over it. I think such verbal crudeness is extremely uncalled for. you wanted the advice of fellow lsers so the least you can do is to be affable and nice about it. like krystellan, i also gave up reading halfway. paragraphing makes it easier for us to read and understand the situation and your train of thoughts. i suppose the onus is on you to convey constructively and expediently if you would like people to read and offer valuable advice. take care.
Diplok Posted September 2, 2007 Posted September 2, 2007 I quit after the 10th line. If you want advice, make it easy for us to read and understand. No, this isn't school but in order for I or anyone else to give advice we need to be able to finish reading your post.
sedgwick Posted September 2, 2007 Posted September 2, 2007 I agree with the others...I couldn't get through it either. Punctuation and paragraphs=good.
AriaIncognito Posted September 2, 2007 Posted September 2, 2007 I quit after a few lines as well. It's not school, but it really needs to be something people can read easily. I'll just comment on your title, you say the breakup was "out of nowhere". It is doubtful that it was out of nowhere. I got up to where you said you lost trust in him when you found he smoked weed. That's where it started. You saw red flags and you ignored them. So, it wasn't out of nowhere, you just chose to dismiss the reality.
Curious139 Posted September 2, 2007 Posted September 2, 2007 This isn't school, this is the real world and you can't write like that. No employer or anyone else is ever going to sort through blocks of writing. Imagine magazines or newspapers written as you have done. Leaving that aside, I think the writing was on the wall for you long ago. You had valid issues of trust. I know it hurts but it also seems that you are well out of the situation.
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