back with ex, just for sex, or is it vulnerbaility? can i tell my man??????

[nasdxxx]

Is love a combination of pain and happiness? Because i am falling apart, missing my boyfriend of one month now. (Formerly my bestfriend from childhood for 16years).

 

When him and i decided to start dating, he was just getting out of a three year reln and i, a one year relationship. He was here on holiday and went back (which is thousands of miles away) to college. We cant see eachother until about December or January 2008 because of conflicting college dates for him and i.

 

Lately i am beginning to get more postive thoughts about my ex, who i broke up with in April.

 

He lives in the same city as i and because he is actively hunting me up, on a daily, sometimes hourly basis, i feel vulnerable that i could end up falling in his lap, even briefly which i am struggling to avoid. But i am weak now.

 

the absence of my boyfriend and only being able to talk about five times a week... is this love, that hurst like this????????

[Lynna]

A long distance relationship is very difficult. the two of you have been friends for a long time though, so that helps. You broke up with this other guy in April. Think about the reasons, why did you break up? Did you instigate it or did he? Compare the two guys, which one do you feel more of a connection for. Think about what you like and dislike about each of them. Which one would you want to spend the rest of your life with?

 

Think about why you are feeling tempted? Are you lonely? Are you just sexually frusterated? Think about what you really want and what you really feel. Try to think for the long term and not for an instant's gratification.

[nasdxxx]

we broke up because he lied and went back on his word as well. i instigated the break up and he believes him and i are still in a relationship... da da da

 

i feel the connection with my former bestfriend although notwithstanding the fact that me and my ex did have a murder connection as well. sometimes just the thought of it all makes me feel as though i would want some more... although i know it would be wrong anyways... we became good friends as well along the way. emotionally i guess the connection was 50/50

 

me and my formermer connect alot emotionally.

 

yes i feel lonely and sexually frustrated and starving all in one breath.

 

ok i am trying now to focus on the ,longterm....

[Lynna]

Okay, you broke up with your ex because he lied and went back on his word. How big was the lie, have you forgiven him for that? Has he shown you that he has changed? Do you think he will lie and betray his word again in the future? If you can't trust him then you do not want to be in an intimate relationship with him. You can be friends if you can handle it, but don't go farther if you can't trust him. If you can't trust him then it makes your decision pretty simple.

 

If you CAN trust him now, then yes, I can see that you have quite a dilema. You have two men who you feel connected to and attracted to. You are thinking for the long-term, that is good. Examine which one you can see yourself spending a lifetime with. Which one has more of the qualities that you value and respect. Which one would you want to be the father of your children and to be an example to them. It won't be an easy decision in this case, give yourself some time and space to figure out what you want before you decide.