thegrilnextdoor Posted July 29, 2007 Posted July 29, 2007 Me and my x broke up about 2 weeks ago after dating for 2 years. we still hang out and call each other. but everytime i call him he's on the phone. he says with guy friends. even when he gets off the phone to "go to sleep" i can call him an hour later and he'll be on the phone with "one of his boys". Could he really have already moved on and found someone else?
AriaIncognito Posted July 29, 2007 Posted July 29, 2007 It's possible that he has someone else. Either way, you need to try to not concern yourself with it, as hard is it may be, because for whatever reason, you're not with him now. I know how hard it is to deal with, but you need to do what you can in order to not drive yourself crazy with wonder. It's of course possible that he is on the phone with guy friends, but either way, he's unfortunately free to be on the phone with whoever he wants. I totally understand how you feel, as my ex started seeing someone right away and it kills me. All I can say is that it's best if you do what you can to fight the urge to be checking in with him. They have no way of missing something that won't leave their life.
Teacher's Pet Posted July 29, 2007 Posted July 29, 2007 Maintaining NC is hard to do, at least at first..... Heck, even after a year of NC, it's tough. My ex started seeing someone (to the best of my knowledge) even BEFORE she broke up with me (I'll never know the truth on that, probably)..... She's apparently in a semi-happy relationship now (not the same guy, though), and the fact that she has pictures of her and him on her profile kinda hurt for a brief while, because I was always stupid enough to keep looking.... Sometimes when you keep "prying", you find what you least expect...or want to see... -tp still cuter than the new guy.
AriaIncognito Posted July 29, 2007 Posted July 29, 2007 Sometimes when you keep "prying", you find what you least expect...or want to see... I've got to agree with tp here. I have done way too much "prying" in my time, and hardly ever has it done me any good. If anything, it provides a good instrument for setback. I mean, what good does it do any of us to find out they are happily moving forward while we are still pining over them?
Trialbyfire Posted July 29, 2007 Posted July 29, 2007 I think you need to accept that a break up means it's over unless you really want him back. If so, make the effort to do so. Otherwise, this friendship limbo will slowly kill you. Step back and stop being friends. Sever all contact and start your cycle of getting over him. Sadness and pain/anger/letting go. You can't be a friend until you're completely over him.
frd150 Posted July 29, 2007 Posted July 29, 2007 I've got to agree with tp here. I have done way too much "prying" in my time, and hardly ever has it done me any good. If anything, it provides a good instrument for setback. I mean, what good does it do any of us to find out they are happily moving forward while we are still pining over them? Prying set me way back this week.At the time (when I found out it did not bother me but now its killing me. Ignorance is bliss. My bliss is gone, my progress . My advice is not to dig. take as long as you can without knowing to heal.Ignorance can be a good thing somtimes.
AriaIncognito Posted July 31, 2007 Posted July 31, 2007 Sorry that you feel you lost some progress this week, frd. Hopefully, that will help show the OP how important it is to try to stick to the NC for a while, at least until the sting wears off a lot.
frd150 Posted July 31, 2007 Posted July 31, 2007 Sorry that you feel you lost some progress this week, frd. Hopefully, that will help show the OP how important it is to try to stick to the NC for a while, at least until the sting wears off a lot. Thanks Aria. Me too. I just cant get it out of my head. Dont pry.
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