sonyjay999 Posted July 26, 2007 Posted July 26, 2007 i met up with her for the first time in a month after i broke up with her during the relationship she was great but towards the end she started takin me for granted because we had a big fight and i called her a foul name, so this attitude took its tow on me so i decided to end it. ok i see this girl everymorning on my way to work she always lookin at me or plain old commenting to get my attention she will do little things as to walk across from me to get my attention the other day she call me to ask me why havent she seen me around and i told her i havent been staying home and thats why u havent seen me in the morning so then she asked me if i had a new gf and i didnt answer her cuz its not her business so she email me later on with the same question i didnt answer it so one day i ask her to meet up for lunch and she agree when we met up she ask me if i had a girl and what was the miracle i ask to see her so i told i just want to have lunch that all and jokin i told her i had a gf she began to ask me a million questions about her. WHY???????? then i got tired so i told her i was jokin but i do have a potential she said i could be honest with her we are friends cuz im seeing someone too then she began to tell all about him how nice he is his job and what he like to do but i told her i m not interested in hearin this but she continue (i guess she was dieing to get this off her chest because alot what she said sounded rehearse) so then she began to tell me that im a great person that has a great heart n only good with it but we didnt see eye to eye so then we went to eat and she was pointing my flaws and i told her ty for pointed them out then she began to tell me about her personal life that she doesnt go out no more (something opposite of when we went out she used to go out alot) then she talk about the new guy sayin that he wants to get married (something we touch on) so then we had to leave we began to walk and she told that it was nice havin lunch with u and she feels good that we were able to talk and be friends that she wishes me good luck on finding the one im lookin for i wish her the same but i was sincere but i felt that she wasnt sincere with me what do u think about my situation what was all the braggin about by the way i do have some feelings for her
brockdarock Posted July 26, 2007 Posted July 26, 2007 Hey sonyjay999, Here's something you need to remember: WOMEN DON'T MAKE SENSE! I don't mean this in a bad way, but you need to realize that you're being tested. Why was she pointing out your flaws at lunch? She wants to see how you will respond. Are you going to agree with everything she says? She's pushing you to see where your boundaries are. "What was all the bragging about?" - Are you talking about her bragging about herself or the guy? I'm a little confused, but I think you're talking about the guy & his job & etc. You pointed out that it sounded "rehearsed", so right there you know that she's once again testing you. Here's what most guys do as soon as a girl brings up another man... they act needy and cling to her! Well, here's a thought...do the opposite and be amazed at the attraction it creates. If I were you, I would actually encourage this woman to be MORE independent. Hope you can pull something useful out of this info. Keep in touch and tell me how it goes. Brock
Author sonyjay999 Posted July 27, 2007 Author Posted July 27, 2007 hey brock thanks for the response i agree with u i know she was testing to see if i will get mad or anything of that nature but i kept it cool and didnt get mad because i have been there before and i have learn that what women want is to get back at a guy so her telling me all this stuff about this new guy to me is all an act to make jealous to make me go and chase her which i havent i do miss her and have feeling for her i do want to be with her but im not going to chase her cuz of this new dude cuz then u look desperate i m playing it cool what do u think and suggest thanks man why do u think she told me all this stuff about this new guy? to rub it all in my face? lol what do u mean to make her be more independent? thanks
brockdarock Posted July 28, 2007 Posted July 28, 2007 Hey sonyjay999, About this whole "other guy" deal. I don't know him personally, but from the way you've described it, I think she's just looking for a reaction. You'll be fine as long as you keep your composure and don't act needy and desparate. Just be the "rock" in the conversation and keep your ground. "what do u mean to make her be more independent?" - OK. I'll give you an example that you could put yourself in. Let's say that this woman calls you because she wants to tell you that she's going to go out with that "other guy" she's been talking about. Now...how would most guys respond? Usually, it's something along the lines like "uhh, well, ok? Have a good time...I guess" Most guys feel a little left out and almost feel like she's having the good time and you're stuck at home by yourself. Now...how would I respond to her if she called me? I would answer "Hey! I'm going out later with the guys tonight, but it's good that YOU finally decided to go out with somebody else and stop buggin' me all the time. Have a good time!" Now, it's hard with just text, but you wouldn't be saying this in a dickhead way. Say it in more of a fun, flirty, playful way. I think you get the point... I added you as a buddy. Just accept my invitation if you would like to keep in touch and talk more. Thanks Brock
Author sonyjay999 Posted July 30, 2007 Author Posted July 30, 2007 i was reading an article on how people who have been dump (which i was the dumper in this case) try to smooth there ego by causing pain and jealousy to there dumper which i think is the case with me by my x talkin about how she s seeing this new guy and how nice he is with her demonstrate how she is trying to make me feel for the decision i made now what are her motive which i dont know i know u suggested maybe she wants me to be needy and chase after her> which i m not i m doing the opposite and u suggested it but how to do i draw the line because i dont know how the NO COntact really works i know separation make the heart grow fonder but what does no contact do
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