tom27 Posted July 25, 2007 Posted July 25, 2007 I've been hanging out with this girl for awhile, but we still haven't reached the point to call us a "thing". She took the initiative to give me her number and told me to call her and was seeing or contacting me in someway nearly every day for almost 2 weeks. We went out on two dates, the first one went great, the second one was a little strange; her best friend came along after we went out to eat. The next day, I told her I thought it threw me off and she felt sorry and agreed to go out again. But she told her friend I had "kinda acted like a jerk." A couple weeks passed, we talked a few times and went out on another date a few days ago, this time just the two of us. It went fairly well. Though, she thought I said I was picking her up 30min later than I did... and the show we went to turned out to be a bust. But I could tell she was attracted to me, but she was still a little quiet. I asked her if she wanted to go out again sometime and she said sure. I'm just worried that the 2nd date changed her opinion of me, negatively. Leading up to the 2nd one, she seemed to be hooked on me like I was a drug. Now, she still shows strong signs of attraction but she isn't taking much initiative to contact me. Where should I go from here? This girl is simply amazing and a lot of people have said we would be very cute together.
jcster Posted July 25, 2007 Posted July 25, 2007 Make sure that the next date is a good one! She probably brought her friend along on the 2nd date to check you out. If you were at all weird about it, that's her fault - it was a bad move on her part (and kind of rude). If she went out with you after the 2nd date, then you probably didn't do too badly. Just try not to overthink it right now, you've just started to get to know each other.
bchlvr Posted July 26, 2007 Posted July 26, 2007 Tom, I hear you are concerned about her having a good opinion of you, but more importantly, what is your opinion of her after what has transpired. I agree with Jcster and would add that if she brought her best friend along and did not check it out with you first, it would be natural to feel caught off-guard and difficult to relax and just be yourself. Did your date tell you that "you kinda acted like a jerk?" Do you know what she is referring to? Those words sound rather judgemental, particularly if you were unprepared for hanging out with others besides your date. Movies that are a flop, shows that go bust, music that's dull, misunderstandings about time are all part of the world of dating. I would hope that your date has enough interest in you as a person so that no matter how the event turns out you still find enjoyment in each other's company. And in that case, your time together can still be a success.
Hazy Posted July 26, 2007 Posted July 26, 2007 I don't think the best friend thing is a big deal, and it looks like you might have to accept that aspect of her. If you don't want her to invite her best friend to hang out unannounced, then don't pursue any further, if this is a big deal to you and you can't accept it. That said, all you can do is give her a call, ask her out again, and see if she says "yes" or not. I would not discuss the best friend thing with her, let that be.
Author tom27 Posted July 26, 2007 Author Posted July 26, 2007 A different, reliable friend of hers told me she said that. This was the next day, after I had called the girl and confronted her about bringing her friend along with. She was referring to when her friend said she felt bad about intruding on our date and would be cool with me taking her back to her house until this girl had to be back home. She was cool about the time misunderstanding. Maybe the show was bad, but we did have some quiet moments where our conversation would break.
Author tom27 Posted July 27, 2007 Author Posted July 27, 2007 We're seeing a movie in a few days now. If the signs are there, I'm going to make a move for the first kiss that coming evening. She's given me signs the past two dates, but I felt it wasn't the right time.
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