Arizona100 Posted July 25, 2007 Posted July 25, 2007 Hello again, You know I was thinking... I am independent, smart, attractive, funny, etc... pretty much I fit the portrait of thousand of other women. There's one thing about me, as soon as I fall for a man, I freak out. Should I call? I think I called him too much. Should I ignore him? But what if he thinks I am breaking up?? Oh I shouldn't have concede to that! Maybe I should be cooler on this ... etc etc .... So what happens when I am like that? The guy leaves of course. Who would stay with someone totally needee and worried? Surely not me. In a word, I become totally insecure. And it drives me crazy. That's not who I am the rest of the time. I know why. Dad left when I was young, mother had very bad opinion of men and of me in general. Ok, now what do I do ? (a health specialist thats for sure, but whats your input)
quankanne Posted July 25, 2007 Posted July 25, 2007 am curious here: Have you had a chance to develop a relationship with your dad over the years, or even recently? Maybe if that gets ironed out, your love life will follow suit, because things with him are calm.
daphne Posted July 26, 2007 Posted July 26, 2007 I think you need to date more people at once, if you can. That way you won't get too heavily invested in one and get too worried if it doesn't pan out. If you make your life fuller and date a lot, you'll find that you become less and less secure. The past can affect you, but you can change to what degree. My mother left when I was 4, so I understand where you're coming from. Take care of yourself. Pamper yourself and dress well and you'll feel really good. Find things that you love doing and do them often. Meet a lot of people. Become more outgoing. Do these things and find a passion in life nad you'll be drawing enough guys in that you won't feel as insecure.
Author Arizona100 Posted July 26, 2007 Author Posted July 26, 2007 No, I don't really see my dad. He's the kind who always make promises and doesn't hold them. I grew tired of it. Yes, multi dating is a good idea but am I going to hurt somebody's feeling if I do so? That's actually a very good idea because that's what happens, I focus my mind on one person and that's where my insecurity kicks in. I can see a situation clearly when it comes to someone else, when it comes to me, it's a total panic Thanks
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