Brattybunny Posted July 24, 2007 Posted July 24, 2007 Okay, I am new here so please bare w/ me. I have been seeing this guy for a few weeks and he makes me SOOOO happy but I just found out that his daughters mother lives with him. He said she sleep down stairs but she lives so they can raise there daughter together and because the housing market sucks and they cant sell the house or afford it solo. He has been clear that they are not together but how do I really know?? In the mean time I cant go over there because she lives there. Like I said, I really like him but I am wodering if this is a red flag and if I should get out now before I am in too deep. If not, how long do I ride it out?? I know its only been a few weeks...any advise would be appricated!
norajane Posted July 24, 2007 Posted July 24, 2007 He said she sleep down stairs but she lives so they can raise there daughter together and because the housing market sucks and they cant sell the house or afford it solo. He has been clear that they are not together but how do I really know?? In the mean time I cant go over there because she lives there. So what if she lives there? If they are not together and are solely living together because of the housing market, then there's absolutely no reason she shouldn't know that he's dating, and there's no reason why you can't go over there. NONE. He's lying to you about the nature of their relationship. If he can't introduce you, he's lying and they are still together.
Tyra Posted July 24, 2007 Posted July 24, 2007 I would get out before you're in too deep. Eventhough his child's mother stay downstairs, their isn't no telling if they are still physically involved with eachother. And if you continue to be with him, you're going to have to put up with her bull**** all the time,you know what I mean. And you know, you can't go over their and spend time with him. Eventhough you may have a house, but who likes to be at their own house all the time. And just like the post above me states, if he can't introduce you two together, then he's lying.
Author Brattybunny Posted July 24, 2007 Author Posted July 24, 2007 I even said to him as a joke "having her live there must put a damper on your personal life" and he said not really, he just doesnt take people home and when he goes out its cool casue he doesnt have to get a sitter. UGH! I know.
nittygritty Posted July 24, 2007 Posted July 24, 2007 In the mean time I cant go over there because she lives there. this is a red flag Even if you could go over there, this would be a deal breaker for most people. He's living with his ex and hiding behind thier child because he likes living with his family and also being able to have girlfriends. He is emotionally unavailable to you. He's obviously probably cheating on the mother of his child. You should run far from this guy. What was your response when he told you that you can't go over there because she lives there?
Author Brattybunny Posted July 24, 2007 Author Posted July 24, 2007 My response to his reply was "huh..well whatever works for you". I really didnt know what to say. Part of me wants to wait a few more weeks to see what happens becasue right now I feel its too soon for me to start questioning him but the other part of me wants to run like hell and not look back cause my gut tells me something isnt right. You hit the nail on the head with him being "emotionally unavailable". I am stuck on stupid.
nittygritty Posted July 24, 2007 Posted July 24, 2007 My response to his reply was "huh..well whatever works for you". I really didnt know what to say. Part of me wants to wait a few more weeks to see what happens becasue right now I feel its too soon for me to start questioning him but the other part of me wants to run like hell and not look back cause my gut tells me something isnt right. You hit the nail on the head with him being "emotionally unavailable". I am stuck on stupid. No, your not stuck on stupid. Your seeing the red flags. He has given you all the information you need. You know that its not in your best interests to date an emotionally unavailable guy. Don't waste your time, his situation won't change in a few more weeks. Yours will, you'll be more emotionally invested but not him, he's already got his current life partner, he's a cheater and your guts telling you something is not right. What's to decide?
allina Posted July 24, 2007 Posted July 24, 2007 Wow, sounds like he's basically admitting to you that he's married and wants to have an affair with you.
Recommended Posts