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Guys is it hard to get serious with an attractive woman who is UNEMPLOYED?

DateAnalyzer

By DateAnalyzer
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DateAnalyzer Established Member

DateAnalyzer

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I don;t know what it is but I can't see myself getting serious with a woman who is not working. Yeah i know the job market can be tough and frustrating but I feel as though a woman shouldn put herself out there is she knows she has to find a job first. when i was unemployed, finding a companion was the last thing on my mind, only finding employment.

jcster Established Member

jcster

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Beware the long term unemployed. There's usually a lot more to the story than simply being out of work.

Chinook Established Member

Chinook

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Are you serious...?

 

Yesterday you turned one down and now you're talking about getting serious...?

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DateAnalyzer Established Member

DateAnalyzer

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Are you serious...?

 

Yesterday you turned one down and now you're talking about getting serious...?

 

 

it's the same girl who wanted to spend the day with me in AC. I just can't get past the unemployed thing

Chinook Established Member

Chinook

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Well, like jcster said, if it's a long term thing then it's not usually something which is a single issue. Also, if she's not actively looking for work, I think that would be a worry too. So you were right to call off the date in AC.

sofakingmad Established Member

sofakingmad

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it's the same girl who wanted to spend the day with me in AC. I just can't get past the unemployed thing

 

why don't you worry about getting past the first date first? :laugh:

melodymatters Established Member

melodymatters

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It seems to me you keep making excuses to NOT date or find anyone. My guess is you are being self protective because of low self esteem ( as noticed from some of your other posts)

 

But seriously, do you know WHy this woman isn't currently working and how long it's been ???

 

Maybe she has a passive income from a business she started or sold ( I do, and I'm also a realtor, so sorry, I don't punch a time clock either)

lino Established Member

lino

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I wouldn't have a problem being with an unemployed woman.

burning 4 revenge Established Member

burning 4 revenge

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It would depend on the circumstances. You'd have to get to know her and her circumstances before you could reasonably judge her. It would be a yellow light, but by no means a deal-breaker

Turquoise Waters Established Member

Turquoise Waters

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I was recently unemployed for six months. It was stressful, but I was still dating while looking for another job. However I am leaving the state, so if she is looking for work long-distance, that can be a problem if you start to like her.

Tip - use this tough time in her life to be the guy who saves the damsel in distress, so to speak. Listen to her vent her frustrations of job hunting, give her tips and support for finding a new job. If you see a job listed in the paper that might be of interest, show her the ad. Show her classified sites, etc., but don't overwhelm her. Be her friend. This scores a lot of points with me.

Touche Established Member

Touche

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It would depend on the circumstances. You'd have to get to know her and her circumstances before you could reasonably judge her. It would be a yellow light, but by no means a deal-breaker

 

:lmao::laugh::p

Touche Established Member

Touche

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I was recently unemployed for six months. It was stressful, but I was still dating while looking for another job. However I am leaving the state, so if she is looking for work long-distance, that can be a problem if you start to like her.

Tip - use this tough time in her life to be the guy who saves the damsel in distress, so to speak. Listen to her vent her frustrations of job hunting, give her tips and support for finding a new job. If you see a job listed in the paper that might be of interest, show her the ad. Show her classified sites, etc., but don't overwhelm her. Be her friend. This scores a lot of points with me.

 

I thought teaching jobs were easy to come by.

 

Anyway, yes I'd be her friend and see where it goes.

burning 4 revenge Established Member

burning 4 revenge

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:lmao::laugh::p

What's so funny about that?

norajane Established Member

norajane

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It would depend on the circumstances. You'd have to get to know her and her circumstances before you could reasonably judge her. It would be a yellow light, but by no means a deal-breaker

 

:D

 

I was unemployed for 9 or 10 months just recently. I didn't look for a job for the first 7 months or so.

 

But had a guy passed me by because of that without even trying to find out more, he'd be the one crying now, because my net worth and income are probably, well, a lot higher than his.

 

Don't jump to conclusions before you get to know people. You are pre-rejecting everyone because you are afraid to date and possibly be rejected by them.

norajane Established Member

norajane

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DA, stop fretting so much. Just go out on dates and see if you like a person and can have fun with them. The rest will fall into place. You don't have to know at the outset how things will turn out, nor do you have to have all kinds of criteria judge people. Just get out there and someone will click.

Touche Established Member

Touche

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Ok, I've told my story before but when I met my H, I was also unemployed. But I had only moved to this area 3 days before we originally met. Our first date was only one week after I moved here. I did find a job shortly after we met.

 

But my H never thought twice about it. In fact, I paid for our European honeymoon and after that, I paid for all the medical expenses associated with the birth of our son. It was never an issue. Oh and I forgot that before all of that, before I even found employment in my new (at that time city) I paid off his school loans and some of his back taxes, with my own savings.

lino Established Member

lino

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I don't see why it should matter if a woman is unemployed or not? for me it's not important.

lonelybird Established Member

lonelybird

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I don't see why it should matter if a woman is unemployed or not? for me it's not important.

you must have lots of money and not worry afford for two

lino Established Member

lino

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well yours & my definition of lots of money may be different but yes I have enough to buy a unit & provide for a family, without luxuries though.

what I'm saying might come across as strange and/or arrogant but what I really mean is that I couldn't care less what a women does even if its nothing at all. if she's someone I'm attracted to & she respects me & loves me like I do her, what she does for a living won't figure in it at all. especially for someone with my rejection record I'd trade love & respect from a woman over employment without thinking for a second.

I disagree with dateanalyzers reasoning.

Tyra Established Member

Tyra

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I don't think it should matter if a woman is unemployed unless of the time period. Meaning her being unemployed for more than a year.But she should always have like money and savings in the bank, so that she doesn't have to rely on a man. But you don't know her circumstances. She couldv'e been laid off, she could've injured herself and it left her without a job, personal issues on the job, family issues, or she could've just had a baby. It's so many reasons.

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DateAnalyzer Established Member

DateAnalyzer

Posted
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I don't think it should matter if a woman is unemployed unless of the time period. Meaning her being unemployed for more than a year.But she should always have like money and savings in the bank, so that she doesn't have to rely on a man. But you don't know her circumstances. She couldv'e been laid off, she could've injured herself and it left her without a job, personal issues on the job, family issues, or she could've just had a baby. It's so many reasons.

 

 

 

But if a women is not employed why is she looking to meet guys? Plus when this one woman found out that I was a Employment Specialist for a Living she says-"Can u help me find a job?" There was nothing sexy about that question and I was turned off

katiebour Established Member

katiebour

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I think employment (or lack thereof) is one thing to consider amongst a variety of factors and attractors. But you have to look at the context, for example:

 

Guy: So what do you do for a living?

Girl: Well, right now I'm unemployed. I actually lost my job last year and although I've been looking things have been tough. I'm looking to find a job in the IT field; I've actually been thinking about going back to school if I don't find something in the next month.

Guy: Oh, well it sounds like you've got a plan- have you applied at Such-and-Such Co.? I heard they were looking for people.

 

versus:

 

Guy: So what do you do for a living?

Girl: I'm unemployed right now. I had a job last year but I lost it. I love being on unemployment and am doing my best to dodge getting an actual job.

Guy: Uh....

 

In both situations, the girl is unemployed. But there's a world of difference between the first and the second scenario.

 

What's important is what kind of person she is, why she's unemployed, and what she's doing about it.

 

Most of us will be unemployed at one point or another for various periods of time. Don't automatically write someone off without knowing their circumstances.

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