funkybassplayer Posted July 21, 2007 Posted July 21, 2007 Hello T i hope you and the kids are well. I have this strong urge to send this too you, but all my friends think write it and port it here. So its been 2 months since i last spoke to you, and i have been doing well, had a couple of dates but not my type, and have still not really been out much as i feel secure at home. Its funny how you just go out and drink, while im here picking up the peides of my broken life. George my parrot layed 2 egges this week so for sure a girl! WEll its the start of your school hols, and im really going to feel it i think, im going to miss going camping with you and your family, and i know Toney will be there instead of me, in the tent i bought for us! you could not even have given back my other 1 ! no no . but im sure ill be just fine, and Mark is off so we will do stuff. I dont really feel right to date just yet, inspite of what i said to you in our last convo. I guess i thought i was better than i was. I always wonder if things are going well between you both, im sure they are, but i wonder if you miss me. In your heart im sure you do, but like everything you'll keep that emotion stuck deep inside of you, but i hope 1 day it will re surface, and you will feel the pain. I woke up this morning, and i still have the urge to sell the house, so i will , and i feel that its a good thing for me, but will take some time, its not a good time to sell, but hopeing to be out by the end of the year, and the porche should be a bit cheper. I sent you an email 4 weeks ago telling you that the cheque i sent was no good. You coul'nt even respond with a quick ok so i know you got it? whats te reason for that? i mean are you so afraid of even sending a quike ok to a buissness email? or did you want me to call and ask if you got the message? hmmm well i wont you know. I hope you dont try to send the old cheque b/c they will add the fee to your account, and im not paying it. I have kept th email as proof. Im not sure if i should even send you a good cheque, as i felt pretty lousy over the treatment and games you played with me in the last weeks and just after our relationnship. Its not fair to beg some1 to be frieds, then toss then aside b/c they get in the way of your imediate plans. I could never do that to you, as i proved when you were crying to stay friends, i could not no way c you hurting, unyet you do it too me without even a care, in fact saying you will contact me, why? to keep my hopes to keep me on the burner. Well i too k the step, and posted your stuff and wallked away from you. I hope you know how much strenth it took to do this, you must, the last time i spoke to you, you know how much i yerned to speck to Ella, and Kai, but had to let them all go, for me, b/c i was urting so much. I gave you fabulos orgasams, but im not the type of guy who will do it at 10pm b4 bed time, i like it at 3am/4am etc, all i got from you was let me sleep! in fact your sleeping got on my nerves! EVEN WHEN I PLANNED A LONG SCENIC ROUGHT AROUND WALES, WHAT DID YOU DO? SLEEP! and i was going up n down the vallys with u snoring in the next seat!! it make s me laugh now, i see the funny side! I hope you remember all this, you were always moaning about something or another, how could you take money from your gran, that she gave you toward the morgae, and spend it on going out then cry to everyone your skint! god, you and your kids come first, thats what i wanted for you, to put your family first, not going out clubbing! you really pulled me throught the mill, Even you ex hubby cant give a **** about you anymore, b/c hes had time away from you, thats why he does not care if your skint or not, and why did you like the idea that he found it hard to move on from you, you bitch you let me sit there and look after you while he text you crap, and got upset, then you say you have no feelings, but wont divorce him? something did not add up, and i dont think that he was as bad as you make out? Maybe you never wanted a divorce cos he would make a meal of you and tarnish your little ego? you bitch, why did you get into a relationship with me when you had so much **** to deal with? I was strong and stood by you but you never ****ing cared did you, you dont ****ing know how hard it was for me to deal with all your stupid issues than any normal woman would have had the decency to unload or at least work with me on them. Then your ****ing clubbing with that little bitch emma, she i know would say crap about me, you bitch, you should have been there for your poor lost children, not dump them off so you can get your fix of getting chatted up with your ugly hook nose friend emma! At least i had the guts to tell you what i thought of all of it, and im sure it goes around in your head, that is why you have trouble sleeping and i dont. People tell me when you come sniffing for the money to ignor you, or tell you to sell the ring that i got for you for xmas. I hope by the time you do sniff for it, i will have the strenth to do just that, and i dont crumble undr your spell, i hope you email me to the old address where i wont c it. You know what, maybe that cheque not being valied happend for a reason, and maybe i should do what u did to me, ignor u and carry on as if nothing has happened! you took lots from me, and i willingly gave it to you, but you never took away my strenth, and you will never find some1 that was willing to go to hell and back as long as things were ok for you and your family, and i did it at the sacrifice of my own happyness, to clear a path for the future for us, and just when things were settling with your kids, and hubby, and i start to see a future, you end it! you ****in bitch, i hope you get yours one day, cause you made me suffer to the point of ending it all only a few weeks ago, while you were out having fun.............****ing tony, he was texting his ex, and told you i cany have anything to do with the kids after a week of knowing you, cant you see what a prat this guy is going to be....well ill leave you both to it! i know in the long run i will find some1 that will treat me with love and respect,. and they will have all i gave to you and more. I invested my life into you, i put my pleasures on hold to be with you and help you overcome things, you took all your **** out on me, you made me feel 2nd best, you ****ing bitch rot in ****ing hell. This what im writing is coming out of me as i write it. I dont hate you, i dont want you back, but i want you to know how i felt, and how you can ****ing throw me aside like a used piece of garbege i have no idea. Well im gonna keep the guitar money, and you can moan and say what you lie, i wont feel bad, as i earned that a 1000 times over. im SO glad i never sent you or your daugter a birthday card! ah ah do you think im a mug? im sure you expected one too! I may not be 6 foot, but no one was more man than me, and i would have fought every inch of the way with you if you would have been my true partner. You lost a great person in me, and one you will never find again, cos i know im specail.
sunnysideup1 Posted July 21, 2007 Posted July 21, 2007 Wow, I'm glad you wrote that here. I'm sure it feels good to get it out of your system and it's a better idea posting it here than to your ex, obviously. One of my exes from 2 years ago was an absolute jerk...he was horribly manipulative and abusive. This wasn't clear to me until after the relationship and until after I had time away to really have a clear mind and make some realizations about this person. Now he's married and as far as I'm concerned, someone else's problem. It's nice to have time away from people that aren't worthy of our time to begin with, you know?
Chinook Posted July 21, 2007 Posted July 21, 2007 Good. Rest easy now y'hear...? She doesn't need to see it, even though you needed to say it. You did good.
Slippy72 Posted July 21, 2007 Posted July 21, 2007 I hope that felt good, getting all that out of your system. You're like me it seems, when I get writing about matters close to my heart I just go all out! I think maybe we should create a topic for everyone to post imaginary letters to their ex, I've been doing it a lot recently and it definitely helps, just letting everything out in the open. Just a thought.
Chinook Posted July 21, 2007 Posted July 21, 2007 I think maybe we should create a topic for everyone to post imaginary letters to their ex, I've been doing it a lot recently and it definitely helps, just letting everything out in the open. Just a thought.There already is one some place. I think it's on the coping board somewhere. It's when you feel like contacting your ex. Some really cathartic letters there. I haven't added mine yet. Don't feel quite angry enough!!!
Slippy72 Posted July 21, 2007 Posted July 21, 2007 There already is one some place. I think it's on the coping board somewhere. It's when you feel like contacting your ex. Some really cathartic letters there. I haven't added mine yet. Don't feel quite angry enough!!! Me neither.....................yet
Slippy72 Posted July 21, 2007 Posted July 21, 2007 Yeah, I remember that topic now. Next time I'm feeling down I might bump it. Hopefully that won't be for a while.
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