emmaUK Posted July 18, 2007 Posted July 18, 2007 the more i think of it.. the more i feel that me n the BF are jsut not right for each other.. trouble is ... i adore him. i really been thinkin today that a split would prob be for the best but i know that once i do it... i wil lbe feeling that overwealming sick feeling and missing him so much and wanting him back so desperatly. we split up a few months back and i cried myself to sleep nearly every night and was a mess. i dont wanna mess him around and chop n change buit i know how much i do love him and how hard it will be and i know there is the biggest chance of me feeling to horrible to keep up with the split and go running back saying i made a mistake i know yuo will say to surround myself with friends but that isnt easy as im on my own alot of the time since havng my daughter and moved away from all friends and dont have a great deal of money to be getting buses and trains to see them. how the F do u finish with someone that you love with all your heart but you know deep down that you will prob be better off with someone else its killin me.. my brain in severly frazzled
jcster Posted July 18, 2007 Posted July 18, 2007 know yuo will say to surround myself with friends but that isnt easy as im on my own alot of the time since havng my daughter and moved away from all friends and dont have a great deal of money to be getting buses and trains to see them. It sounds to me like you have aquired a dependence on this guy far and above any emotion that you might feel. He's the one treat you allow yourself. You look forward to it far more than it might warrant. When your life gets out of balance, sometimes you will put more emphasis on relationships than they are worth. Try looking at it from this angle for a bit. Ask yourself, what EXACTLY will I miss if I break up with this guy? Is it him, or the fact that for 2 days you can get away from your life and spend it with someone who doesn't really live in the real world?
Author emmaUK Posted July 18, 2007 Author Posted July 18, 2007 Ask yourself, what EXACTLY will I miss if I break up with this guy? i will miss so much though thats the thing... we have had so many good times together, he is great with my daughter, the sex is great, the cuddles are great, he will massage me for hours and not complain (no other guy has ever done that b4), we have so many similar views and interests, he knows things about me that i dont think i will ever dare to tell anyone else, my family like him.
Ruby Posted July 18, 2007 Posted July 18, 2007 I am in the same position! I know I need to just break it off but I am finding it sooooooooooo hard!
Author emmaUK Posted July 18, 2007 Author Posted July 18, 2007 i said i think we shud finish earlier but as soon as we sort of said bye.... i felt physically sick n rang him up n asked him what he wants .. he said he was on his way to football so we'd talk later. GRRRR i need 2 do it ... its (
Trialbyfire Posted July 18, 2007 Posted July 18, 2007 What you do is to set your boundaries. If he's unable or unwilling to meet them, the two of you have compatibility issues. It doesn't mean either person is a terrible person, it just means that something has to change, in order for the two of you to remain together. If yours is a hard boundary and so is his, chalk it up to the incompatibility of core requirements. There's no shame in acknowledging this.
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