Ruby Posted July 15, 2007 Posted July 15, 2007 Oh My God!!!!!!!!!! How do I break up with someone who I love and dont want to split from? He is the best and yet he has a thing he does that I cannot put up with and i KNOW it wont change and every time he does it I get angrier and angrier! I know I must finish it for my own sake but has anyone out there been in this situation? Oh damn please help!
sb129 Posted July 15, 2007 Posted July 15, 2007 You say you don't want to split up with him... you have got some quite good advice regarding this situation, yet instead of talking to him about it, a couple of hours later you have decided you are going to break up with him, even though you don't want to! ruby, I asked in the other thread if you wanted to break up with him because you actually can't be with him, or if you are going to try and use it as a manipulation tool to try and get him to do what you want? Why won't you try and talk to him in a rational mature way before you start making rash decisions like splitting up with him. Because if you do split up, you may end up even more unhappy than you are now, when the situation could have been resolved with a talk...
nylah Posted July 15, 2007 Posted July 15, 2007 Oh My God!!!!!!!!!! How do I break up with someone who I love and dont want to split from? He is the best and yet he has a thing he does that I cannot put up with and i KNOW it wont change and every time he does it I get angrier and angrier! I know I must finish it for my own sake but has anyone out there been in this situation? Oh damn please help! What's he doing that's so bad?
Author Ruby Posted July 15, 2007 Author Posted July 15, 2007 SB you have given me fabulous advice and I thank you very much. The problem is that I have spoken to him about this very seriously not so long ago and I explained in a very nice way that I could not put up with this and he said he would try not to do it and he has! How many times can I talk to him about this? Apart from the fact that he is 100% in the wrong this time, HE should be the one calling ME to sort this out!
Author Ruby Posted July 15, 2007 Author Posted July 15, 2007 He rang me earlier to ask for something he left in my car that he needs for work - I dropped it to his house and he didnt even try to talk to me about the problem! I told him yesterday not to contact me unless he is willing to discuss this and apologise. I have to be strong here and do what is right for me in the long run We have been together a year and he has done this to me countless times (Ignoring me for no serious reason)
sb129 Posted July 15, 2007 Posted July 15, 2007 OK, well obviously I don't know the full story, and can only see what you write here, so I don't know his side of it either. But when you say you call him and he won't call back, is it to talk about problems, or just to say hi? If it is going to be a recurring argument, then you need to seriously think about whether this is a deal breaker for you, and stick to your decision once you have made it. If you have threatened in the past, but not followed thru with your actions, then you are giving him the message that he can get away with stuff. On the other hand, maybe you need to relax a little.... he doesn't need to be on the other end of the phone 24-7 does he? I don't think I know enough about the intricacies of the situation to really comment..... i know you are frustrated, but is there any way you guys could reach a compromise?
Trialbyfire Posted July 15, 2007 Posted July 15, 2007 I'm uncertain why you would drop something off at his house, if it was something he needed. Was there no way that he could come and get it instead? Are you displaying doormat tendencies to the point where he's come to expect that it's all take on his side?
Author Ruby Posted July 15, 2007 Author Posted July 15, 2007 I dropped the stuff to his house as I did not want him to come here as my son was here and I dont want him involved. I am no doormat! He knows this as well. He also knows he has gone too far now.
nylah Posted July 15, 2007 Posted July 15, 2007 I dropped the stuff to his house as I did not want him to come here as my son was here and I dont want him involved. I am no doormat! He knows this as well. He also knows he has gone too far now. I'm new to this site and I was just wanting to know if there is a reason that you ignore some of the questions that are posted to you??? Is it that you want to hear from only certain people? are the questions/comments not interesting enough for you? do you just want attention, so you posted "I must leave the love of my life" so people could ask why, and you ignore them? or are some people just rude? I'm just curious...... If you ignore this than I will assume the latter of them is true.... I hope everything works out for ya:)
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