Cioriel Posted July 13, 2007 Posted July 13, 2007 My ex and I broke up 2 months ago and it came out of nowhere - even to him it seemed as he said he hadn't thought of doing it before the afternoon he actually did it. Long story short, he said that he realized he was unhappy (in general) and felt like somewhere his life had gone off track. He said he needed to be alone awhile and figure out what makes him happy. He has changed a lot, including leaving me, getting a full time job, moving out of his parents house (which he's in the process of doing now), and he'll be done w/ school very soon. He said he still wanted to be friends and has actually been making effort, so I don't think this is just the classic "I feel bad so i'll say I want to be friends so I don't feel so guilty" line. One major twist in this is that we work together, so we see each other every single day. I kind of started no contact a few weeks ago...I say kind of because I didn't initiate any communication and told him I wouldn't be walking to or from work with him and wouldn't be doing lunch w/ him anymore. If he wrote me emails (which he did) I responded shortly and cordially, but not really friendly. I did this monday and tuesday. Tuesday afternoon he asked to talk and he started crying, saying that he missed me as a friend. He specifically said "like, you miss me as a boyfriend, I can miss you as a friend." So I thought that meant for sure we were just friends. I did no contact the next week and he got the message left me alone. But then the following week, on Monday morning he specifically walked the way I walk to work, instead of the way he normally goes (the way he and i used to walk together). We talked and contact was reinitiated. He also has this thing where he will hug me anytime we leave each other. Again, I never initiate - it's always him. He also asked me to come over and help decorate his apartment. Today he asked me if I wanted to go to lunch w/ him which seemed kind of big to me because he was driving and it's one of the first times we've gone somewhere in his car together since the breakup - it just felt couply. And when we hang out and talk about music or random stuff, i still feel like there's something there and things click so well. He said when we broke up that he didn't fall out of love w/ me and was that he was trying to transfer those feelings to friend feelings. so now I don't know what to do. I don't think he's sending me signals on purpose or anything, but all my friends say that he is trying to have it both ways and he can't do that. I just don't get what is going on in his head...I think he feels like he is acting like friends, but most people feel like he's acting like more than friends. Could this mean anything at all as far as how he feels about me or possibly getting back together? I'm not sure whether to just keep being friends and see if this goes anywhere, to keep being friends and just focus on the fact that he broke up w/ me and only wants to be friends, or do no contact. Please please please help - I am so confused by him and would appreciate the objective opinions on this....
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