hatethatman Posted July 10, 2007 Posted July 10, 2007 "XXX, I hope things are going well for you. Hug the kids for me, just don`t tell them it`s from me...I was blessed to have you in my life, allbeit a short time.......No, that wasn`t a short joke.....lol....XXX, you are a wonderful mom and a fantastic, beautiful women. I hope X realizes that some day. You are a class act girl, you do for YOU and the kids, the best that you can. I know you will..........When I told you I loved you, I meant it.........Be good girl......XXXXX" ********************************************************* i was sent this email by my ex about month ago...i didn't reply. he dumped me for someone else. i didn't reply back , i thought why bother? and no reply would be better than keeping something going...but its bothering me, so my question is...what was his point in saying that...when i don't believe him anyway. i know u all can't tell me whats going on in his head, but help me analyze his motive. i don't want him back & honestly its so hard to not forward this to new chick, but i think why hurt her? i'm sure he'll do that on his own, given time. what a creep....i just can't figure what i saw in him. but his purpose for saying the above is pointless to me. so, whats ur opinion?
I love hot men. Posted July 10, 2007 Posted July 10, 2007 "XXX, I hope things are going well for you. Hug the kids for me, just don`t tell them it`s from me...I was blessed to have you in my life, allbeit a short time.......No, that wasn`t a short joke.....lol....XXX, you are a wonderful mom and a fantastic, beautiful women. I hope X realizes that some day. You are a class act girl, you do for YOU and the kids, the best that you can. I know you will..........When I told you I loved you, I meant it.........Be good girl......XXXXX" ********************************************************* i was sent this email by my ex about month ago...i didn't reply. he dumped me for someone else. i didn't reply back , i thought why bother? and no reply would be better than keeping something going...but its bothering me, so my question is...what was his point in saying that...when i don't believe him anyway. i know u all can't tell me whats going on in his head, but help me analyze his motive. i don't want him back & honestly its so hard to not forward this to new chick, but i think why hurt her? i'm sure he'll do that on his own, given time. what a creep....i just can't figure what i saw in him. but his purpose for saying the above is pointless to me. so, whats ur opinion? I don't feel that forwarding it to his new girl would have any effect because it is definitely not one trying to get back with you or coming on to you in any way. It's a condescending type letter to help you feel better. He doesn't want to see you again, just telling you it wasn't you who was the reason he broke up with you, because you are great. He is simply trying to help you feel better about him breaking up with you. He thinks you might be devastated over it. I don't even think he was expecting a reply. Don't read much into it except a "I dumped you, you're still a great woman, you will find someone else" message.
nittygritty Posted July 10, 2007 Posted July 10, 2007 It sounds like he is just polishing off his rearview mirror. He's a jerk trying to feel good about himself and also keeping his options open. He would like to have a spare girl, on the side with no expectations of him. Who will just wait for whatever crumbs of attention he decides to throw her way. I think people like this need their ego fed by thinking themselves to be better than the conquests they leave behind. Your right not to respond. Do not give him the satisfaction or ego boost that he is so obviously needing. I think he does want you to respond. He wants to hear how much you love him, how much you miss him, how great a guy you think he is, the suffering. Yuck!!! You have no need to clean off your rearview mirror so just keep going forward.
miss snoopy Posted July 10, 2007 Posted July 10, 2007 I agree with the above posters. My ex did that once to his ex before me when we were going through a rough patch - I used to snoop on his emails so saw it. As soon as the poor excited girl emailed back, ecstatic, he blew cold and that's how he always played it, push and pull, when he sensed she was moving on he'd turn on the "I'll never find anyone like you" (then why leave?) and "I think about you all the time" etc, but as soon as she replied in kind he was back to his normal self. He is a cruel, selfish creep and your ex sounds similar. I'd ignore this email and thank your lucky stars you're shot of him. Imagine reading that when you were with him, about one of his exes? Especially if he hadn't yet told you he loved you.
nittygritty Posted July 10, 2007 Posted July 10, 2007 I agree with the above posters. My ex did that once to his ex before me when we were going through a rough patch - I used to snoop on his emails so saw it. As soon as the poor excited girl emailed back, ecstatic, he blew cold and that's how he always played it, push and pull, when he sensed she was moving on he'd turn on the "I'll never find anyone like you" (then why leave?) and "I think about you all the time" etc, but as soon as she replied in kind he was back to his normal self. He is a cruel, selfish creep and your ex sounds similar. I'd ignore this email and thank your lucky stars you're shot of him. Imagine reading that when you were with him, about one of his exes? Especially if he hadn't yet told you he loved you. My ex was like that too. I think my ex struggled with intimacy issues. He loves his ex girlfriends when they are gone but can't "love" the current girlfriend that he is having a sexual relationship with.
Lostgurl Posted July 10, 2007 Posted July 10, 2007 I say let sleeping dogs lie. Just throw the email in the trash bin and forget about it. It sounds like he's feeling some guilt for cheating on you/leaving you for someone else.
miss snoopy Posted July 10, 2007 Posted July 10, 2007 He loves his ex girlfriends when they are gone but can't "love" the current girlfriend that he is having a sexual relationship with. So right. After months of NC my ex has recently emailed me now he's seeing someone... what a creep! Posted about it here. You're absolutely right about the ego stroking - everyone tells me my ex has really low self worth underneath the superficial confidence and "player" exterior. We should thank our lucky stars we're rid of them!
Author hatethatman Posted July 11, 2007 Author Posted July 11, 2007 read this link...it's very interesting. so glad, this relationship didn't continue. my guy was #2....what was ur ex? http://www.mental-health-matters.com/articles/article.php?artID=157
nittygritty Posted July 12, 2007 Posted July 12, 2007 read this link...it's very interesting. so glad, this relationship didn't continue. my guy was #2....what was ur ex? http://www.mental-health-matters.com/articles/article.php?artID=157 I think that list of characteristics of a loser lean closer to the characteristics of a possible or potential abuser. I'm confused about what your asking? Are you saying that your ex only had the #2 characteristic on that list? Maybe I read the article wrong but I don't think that each number was a specific type of loser. That list didn't really reflect my ex or the relationship problems. Thats a good thing I guess.
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