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Posted

Ex broke up with me early march after more than 6 yrs. few days later is with my friend. They are still togather. I have been in NC for a little over 6 weeks. Shes been callinging or texting once every 14 days or so. Shes called again today multiple times. I ignored the calls. She called my sister to tell me to call her b/c it was important. My sister asked what its about and all my ex said was shes wanted some type of closure. What is this closure she is refereing too?? I have a feeling shes just going to say lets never be friends again, Im pissed you never pick up, and so on.

 

~by the way one ofmy friends called her the next day saying she should stop calling me. I dont know why he did that.

Posted

no such thing as closure from her, it comes from inside you, and only you need to know about it. I would'nt even bother to let her put her mind at rest, you just stick to no contact, and in your heart you will know inside when you have closure. You know it when in your mind you can wish the ex well in her new life.

Posted

I think after you two have apparently moved on it is selfish to ask for closure. One day you will see each other out on the town and neither one of you will really care or be hurt by the actions of the other. That is closure, not some discussion reliving the past.

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Posted

I still dont get what closure means though. Im just confused I guess

Posted

"Closure" in this case is more a case of trying to get on your good side so that she looks like less of a bitch for what she did to you. Think: manipulation and assuaging guilt.

 

She doesn't want to be the bad guy, or have others think of her as the bad guy so she intends to contact you, and get your 'understanding' so that you won't think she's a bitch and will encourage your friends to stop seeing her as a bitch too. Perhaps there is a sense of wanting to make sure you are hanging out on a distant back burner in case she needs some sort of fallback plan.

 

Honestly, I wouldn't bother. Keep ignoring her. If she continues ask someone (your sister maybe?) to tell her to stop and leave you alone. If she refuses to stop, get the word to her boyfriend that she won't leave you alone. If she wants 'closure' let her find it herself. If she feels bad for what she did, then that is her problem not yours.

  • Author
Posted
"Closure" in this case is more a case of trying to get on your good side so that she looks like less of a bitch for what she did to you. Think: manipulation and assuaging guilt.

 

She doesn't want to be the bad guy, or have others think of her as the bad guy so she intends to contact you, and get your 'understanding' so that you won't think she's a bitch and will encourage your friends to stop seeing her as a bitch too. Perhaps there is a sense of wanting to make sure you are hanging out on a distant back burner in case she needs some sort of fallback plan.

 

Honestly, I wouldn't bother. Keep ignoring her. If she continues ask someone (your sister maybe?) to tell her to stop and leave you alone. If she refuses to stop, get the word to her boyfriend that she won't leave you alone. If she wants 'closure' let her find it herself. If she feels bad for

what she did, then that is her problem not yours.

 

WOW I never thought of it this way at all!!!!

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