ahah2322 Posted July 7, 2007 Posted July 7, 2007 do you girls experience this? in the initial stages (a couple of months to a year) of a relationship, your boyfriend seems to be all over you, calling you when he has the chance to, constant stream of text messages, surprises.... et cetera.... however, after some time, he just stops doing all these/ a drastic drop in all these romantic actions... my boyfriend rarely texts me during the day... and the only time i hear from him is at night when he calls. we usually talk for 30 mins, approx. we do try to meet up at least twice a week though; due to our busy scheduals. he used to message me every morning... wishing me a great day, calling me every now and then to find out how i was doing... et cetera. he used to be excited about dates and everything... but now he doesn't seem as interested as before. he is a sweet guy but i know he's extremely capable of being more passionate and this is causing me to be a little resentful. is this a sign of waning interest/love? can the initial stages of a relationship be resuscitated? or, is this actually normal? i'm really confused and i hope to seek some enlightenment. i really don't want to be with someone who does not love me anymore.
jcster Posted July 7, 2007 Posted July 7, 2007 A lot of people go over the top at the beginning of a relationship. After a while, though, the "honeymoon" period is over and real life starts up again. If you want to talk to him more often than you are, you will need to call him. He can't go all out for the rest of his life - it's just not possible.
konfuzd Posted July 7, 2007 Posted July 7, 2007 Yes, it's absolutely normal, and no, I don't think there's much you can do to get things back the way they were (with the same guy anyways). Here's the deal: Have you ever bought a new car, or known someone who has? At first, you take immaculate care of it, don't drive on gravel roads, wash it once a week, don't allow anyone to eat in it to retain that 'new car' smell. Eventually, you start bending the rules a bit, visit the drive thru, wash it once a month... etc I think you get the point. The novelty of a new gf has worn off for him. He doesn't necessarily care about you any less, it's just the progression of things. It will hit you eventually too, but unfortunately in relationships, it rarely happens for both partners at the same time, so one is left longing for more.
Topper Posted July 7, 2007 Posted July 7, 2007 do you girls experience this? in the initial stages (a couple of months to a year) of a relationship, your boyfriend seems to be all over you, calling you when he has the chance to, constant stream of text messages, surprises.... etcetera.... however, after some time, he just stops doing all these/ a drastic drop in all these romantic actions... my boyfriend rarely texts me during the day... and the only time i hear from him is at night when he calls. we usually talk for 30 mins, approx. we do try to meet up at least twice a week though; due to our busy schedules. he used to message me every morning... wishing me a great day, calling me every now and then to find out how i was doing... etcetera. he used to be excited about dates and everything... but now he doesn't seem as interested as before. he is a sweet guy but i know he's extremely capable of being more passionate and this is causing me to be a little resentful. is this a sign of waning interest/love? can the initial stages of a relationship be resuscitated? or, is this actually normal? I'm really confused and i hope to seek some enlightenment. i really don't want to be with someone who does not love me anymore. He was the one doing all the calling and such? Did you ever just call him up to say hello how are you doing? woman seem to want guys to always do these small little things for them. but did you ever stop to think that he may also like you to make that morning call? Maybe you could just surprise him with something that lets him know that you appreciate all his attention.
LN99 Posted July 7, 2007 Posted July 7, 2007 I see it happen all the time. The relationship is usually perfect in the beginning, then as time goes on, it changes. Sometimes for the better, sometimes for the worse. It's like people try less to impress you and just become comfortable. I've even experienced it first hand in relationships. Its normal.
curiousnycgirl Posted July 7, 2007 Posted July 7, 2007 Of course it's normal, its called wooing - it only happens at the start of a relationship. Once things settle down you achieve "normal" this is the true test of compatibility - not when you are both on best behaviour - now when you are yourselves. Now you can see if you guys really like each other, as you are/would be normally. Make sense?
lino Posted July 7, 2007 Posted July 7, 2007 I'm a guy and this has happened to me alot. Girls have been really into me at 1st and then sometimes in a matter of just a week they go cold on me and dump me. I've never even been given the chance to lose interest in a girl I was really into
Trialbyfire Posted July 7, 2007 Posted July 7, 2007 The joys of the mating game. Stage 1: All out blood lust pursuit fueled by massive pheromone surges. Stage 2: Upon "getting", the real learning process begins to happen. Communication levels drop, behaviours change from what the girl wants to the real guy. At this point, women are confused. Huh? What happened? You're in Stage 2. Depending on personality type, you will react as follows: a) Feel insecure and angst all over the guy about it. b) Mirror what you perceive as withdrawal and move on. c) See what happens. A good time to sit back and decide if you're compatible.
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