Texan Posted July 1, 2007 Posted July 1, 2007 I know I don't post a great deal on here... but I read the LDR and friends forum religiously... so I am here for a little support, I guess... My SO and I have had a long talk and have mutually decided to end our relationship... she's had so many things happen in her life over the past few years and she is now reaching a stage where she is able to get past over a lot of it... however... We've had an intense LDR now since we started talking late last year... we've spent almost every other weekend together since February, either me there or her here... and it's been great... until this weekend... she had family plans (I knew about them in advance) and, even so, I usually get a call or two throughout the weekend. No calls this weekend... a couple of texts saying 'I love you'... but nothing else... and then the talk a little while ago... which is unusual since we are both generally asleep at this time. She called crying... about how the changes are affecting the way she feels about our relationship. She doesn't want to be LD... and we can neither move to be with the other for the foreseeable future... in this case, we're talking at least a couple of years. Long story short... we ended it tonight... no arguing or anything like that... both still caring very much for one another, but realizing that circumstance doesn't allow for what we want right now... I'm sitting here... admittedly hurting... feelings of sorrow and loss... and feeling very much alone. I've lost a lot of friends over the past few years... some because of my divorce 4 years ago... some having passed away or been killed... others who didn't like my choice of girlfriend and who walked away... I guess I just need to feel that someone understands the hurt and can remind me that things do get better... I keep telling myself this... but sometimes telling yourself this stuff just isn't enough... I hope that made sense. Thanks for taking the time to read this... A lonely Texan in Dallas
catrocks Posted July 1, 2007 Posted July 1, 2007 I'm really sorry for what happened, breakups really are horrible, especially if you still care for one another. The best thing to do is give each other some space and time to think about things and to start to move on. If you still care deeply about each other then there's no reason why you shouldn't try to remain friends, but if you want that then you both need time first. I don't know what to tell you other than what you want to hear and already know - it really will get better with time. It sounds like you've been through a lot already but if you can get through this then you will end up a stronger person. It will take time but let yourself feel the pain and remember that it will get better. Again I'm really sorry about your breakup, but you do sound like a nice person and I'm sure that you will meet the perfect person in time.
LN99 Posted July 1, 2007 Posted July 1, 2007 LDR's are hard to do. I mean, I give people credit for attempting them and making them work. I mean, it's gotta be tough, especially when you both have separate lives and cannot relocate to be with each other. At least the two of you tried to make a go at it. You both found out it just wasn't working. It happens. The good thing is that as time goes on, you will be able to realize the many different reasons why it just wasn't working. Right now its not as clear as it will be in a few months. In the long run, its for the best. I guess there is always hope things will work out for the two of you in the future. But if not, then there are always possibilities elsewhere.
Freedom Now Posted July 1, 2007 Posted July 1, 2007 I hurts terribly when you both still care about each other deeply when the relationship ends. I have been there. And it was a horrible place to be for awhile. But I am better today. I healed and my heart is open for someone to come into my life. But it took time and healing. I am so sorry for your pain. Peace to you, my friend. FN
This_Too_Shall_Pass Posted July 1, 2007 Posted July 1, 2007 Texan, I'm truly sorry how you feel. I don't know what to say, really. But trust that life has it's own plan, and it will eventually lead you to where you were meant to be. Please don't be too upset (I know it's not possible, but I had to say that). Do post on here and let us know what's on your mind. We are here to listen. -TTSP.
Hestia Posted July 1, 2007 Posted July 1, 2007 It isnt as terrible as it sounds. You broke up friendly and you didnt lose each other's respect or care, there's no reason to stop being friends or not to contact once in a while. remember, it could be much worse. you didnt lose her. who know, maybe in the future you can try again. right now, get out and have fun. life is short.
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