lara_croft Posted June 28, 2007 Posted June 28, 2007 So I met this hot guy a few weeks ago at the bar I meet friends afterwork at. We had good convo but I had to leave the bar early to take a sick friend home so I never got the chance to get his number. I went back a couple times and didn't see him so I figured I wouldn't again. I went back on Tuesday to play trivia there and he showed up. He was with a friend and came up and started talking to me. He bought me a drink and we stayed til closing just chatting. It was pretty late so he offered to drive me home and we ended up making out and then having sex. We chatted afterwards and then he asked for my number and gave me his. I know I shouldn't have had sex with him that quickly even though we both enjoyed it. I've never done that before that soon... Anyway, I think he's sweet and cute and I'd like to at least try to see if a relationship can work. My friends say I should call him if I don't hear from him by Saturday because he made sure I had his number too. I was thinking of calling him tomorrow evening to see if he wants to meet up to watch our team's baseball game Saturday afternoon. I figure it's casual and if he says no, it's no biggie. And I guess I'm also wondering if I should somehow address the having sex part the other night because I've never done that and I don't want him to think that's all I was looking for. Appreciate any advice because I want to do this right....
Rufio Posted June 29, 2007 Posted June 29, 2007 You Should Definatly Let Him Know That You're Not Usually Like That, And As For Calling Him, You Should. A Baseball Game Is Casual, No Pressure And He Gets To See You On Your Own Grounds and See How You Really Are. If He Isnt Too Enthusiastic About Meeting Up Then, Give Him A chance To Redeem Himself By Getting In Contact With You About Aranging Something Else, And If Nothing Comes Of It, Then Think Of It As An Enjoyable Experience Between Two People And That Was all It Was MEant To Be.. Dont Regret What You Did, Everything Happens For A Reason. x
Author lara_croft Posted June 29, 2007 Author Posted June 29, 2007 You Should Definatly Let Him Know That You're Not Usually Like That, And As For Calling Him, You Should. A Baseball Game Is Casual, No Pressure And He Gets To See You On Your Own Grounds and See How You Really Are. If He Isnt Too Enthusiastic About Meeting Up Then, Give Him A chance To Redeem Himself By Getting In Contact With You About Aranging Something Else, And If Nothing Comes Of It, Then Think Of It As An Enjoyable Experience Between Two People And That Was all It Was MEant To Be.. Dont Regret What You Did, Everything Happens For A Reason. x Thank you SO much for your reply. I've never done something like that before and while I don't regret in the sense that it was an enjoyable experience for both of us, I don't want him to have the wrong idea. I'm 29 and he's 35 so maybe guys at that age see things differently. Anyway, I'm gong to give him a call this evening. No regrets.
Spacecowboy79 Posted June 30, 2007 Posted June 30, 2007 Wow, I am in a very, very similar situation with a woman that I met recently! I was actually thinking about calling her and asking her to a baseball game. We met a few weeks ago, "hit it off" really well, exchanged numbers, and she told me to call her when she got back from visiting her hometown, which will be this weekend.
zilverenvlinder Posted June 30, 2007 Posted June 30, 2007 I disagree. Do NOT apologize for your behavior. You're a grown woman who has every right to have sex at her free will. He will be grateful that you're not throwing a line at him.
Lizzie60 Posted June 30, 2007 Posted June 30, 2007 You can call him if you want... why not? You should not address the 'sex' part... first of all, even if you say you never done that before...he might think 'yeah right, she's not going to tell me she did, blablabla' ... plus there is nothing wrong with having sex on the first date... are you wondering if he did have sex on his first dates ... I bet you're not...so why would it be different for you?
Author lara_croft Posted July 1, 2007 Author Posted July 1, 2007 Well I called him last night and it went straight to voicemail. I left a brief message saying: "Hi J, it's R. Hope your day's going well. Not sure if you're working tomorrow but I'm planning to watch the baseball game and wanted to see if you wanted to meet up. Let me know. bye." Haven't heard anything back and I'm assuming I won't. Definitely a little disappointed but I'm going on a week's vacation tomorrow so that'll be a good distraction. Chances are pretty high that I will run into him again because he's a regular at that place my friends and I hang out at. If I do, I'll leave it up him to decide if he wants to communicate. zilverenvlinder and Lizzie60, I think you're right. I've been beating myself up over having sex so fast when I should have just enjoyed it for what it was but I was overanalyzing everything that happened before and after. I'm still good friends with this guy I dated briefly. A real alpha guy that works in law enforcement and I asked his opinion on the situation and he said that if most guys he knew are looking just to hook up with a girl for a night they won't give out their number. If they're looking for a purely physical relationship they'll get her number but not give out theirs giving themselves a way out if they change their minds, and if they're thinking it could be more, they'll give make sure that she has their number too. Maybe this guy just changed his mind. Spacecowboy79, it sounds like you have a potentially really good thing happening. Have you talked to her since you guys met? Definitely call her and let us know how it goes!
Spacecowboy79 Posted July 1, 2007 Posted July 1, 2007 Yeah I talked to her a few days after the weekend we met and, well, you and i have both experienced the same thing basically! She told me to call her in a few weeks because 1.) it was finals week and she needed to study for exams and 2) she was going to be out of town to go visit her parents. So a few weeks have passed and I am going to call her tomorrow night. I hope that we will hit it off again. My only concern is that I am hoping our encounter was not just a fling. I mean, i met her on a Friday night, and we talked for 3 hours by ourselves and really clicked. Then Saturday rolled around and we spent most of the day together, and Saturday night was, well, I will leave it at that! As for your situation, the ball is in his court, if he responds then go with it. If he doesn't then be mad for just a day, don't let it get you down and depressed like it does me!
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