9Lives Posted June 29, 2007 Posted June 29, 2007 You know, hate makes you less of a human being. It eats at YOUR soul not theirs. It makes YOU feel bad not them. Not being able to hate, isn't such a bad thing IMHO. As much as xMr Chinook hurt me, I can still honestly say that I love him and I am blessed he was in my life. He may be gone now and I have to deal with that; but my life is RICHER for him having been there. Chinook, how are you today? I am partly cloudy. 4 days now. I need to stop counting. I still cant believe we cant be together and he seems to be fine with that. That hurts alot.
selarom Posted June 29, 2007 Posted June 29, 2007 I thought I might run tonight but I really don't want to because all the routes are 'our' routes. I don't want to go on the bike. Your posts are very well articulated and describe well how no contact feels. I've been doing no contact for over a month, and things are still painful. However, the one thing that does seem to take my mind off of it a bit, and relieve some of the pain, is exercise. So I say just go out and run, pick a direction and go; don't worry about a route.
frd150 Posted June 29, 2007 Posted June 29, 2007 Chinook, how are you today? I am partly cloudy. 4 days now. I need to stop counting. I still cant believe we cant be together and he seems to be fine with that. That hurts alot. 9Lives, 6 months today and i still wake up thinking the same thing. Or at least i assume shes fine with it. Reading what you and chinook put down really helps. Even this far out. Sorry for the random comments. B.TW. Speaking of routes, today i have to drive a very familiar one. It is the one to her familys vacation house. I have to drive right past it. So many good times there. God i miss it/Her. Have a good day Guys.
Author Chinook Posted June 29, 2007 Author Posted June 29, 2007 Hi Guys Not a great day here. I'm still having swings of emotional ups and downs. One minute I think I'll be okay and the next, it's unbearable when I realise exactly what happened and he's not coming back. I think I'm gonna move onto a new thread in the coping section - this is for breakups and I think I'd like to think of myself as 'coping' now rather than 'breaking' if that makes sense. Afterall, how long does it take to have a 'breakup'...? It only actually takes a moment, once the words are read or spoken, that's pretty much it. It can't be taken back after that. So you have to learn how to cope. So I think I've come to terms with the fact that we've broken up now. Now I have to deal with me and my feelings about it. C x
9Lives Posted June 29, 2007 Posted June 29, 2007 Hi Guys Not a great day here. I'm still having swings of emotional ups and downs. One minute I think I'll be okay and the next, it's unbearable when I realise exactly what happened and he's not coming back. I think I'm gonna move onto a new thread in the coping section - this is for breakups and I think I'd like to think of myself as 'coping' now rather than 'breaking' if that makes sense. Afterall, how long does it take to have a 'breakup'...? It only actually takes a moment, once the words are read or spoken, that's pretty much it. It can't be taken back after that. So you have to learn how to cope. So I think I've come to terms with the fact that we've broken up now. Now I have to deal with me and my feelings about it. C x Yeah I am over there too. All of it helps. I am doing better. I really can say that and YOU WILL TOO. I will be checking on you.
frd150 Posted June 29, 2007 Posted June 29, 2007 Sorry to hear about your not so good day. I have a long drive ahead of me. I will think of my six months and what i have learned. Maybe i can come up with something that can help. That magic thing we all look for. See you in coping,perhaps. Do something fun today. Leave work if you are there now. Its overrated anyway.
the_otherhalf Posted June 29, 2007 Posted June 29, 2007 Wow, talk about my situation near verbatim: too many fights, breakup, NC, random e-mail from him, wondering whether or not to respond... That was three weeks ago for me, and I eventually did respond. The curiosity killed me. My ex and I met up (the reason why he e-mailed me). Surprisingly, seeing him brought me quite a bit more closure. Afterwards, I didn't wonder how soon he would call or text or talk to me again. It didn't really matter anymore. Of course, then comes the next cycle that I'm feeling right now. "Well, maybe he will say something again...? Maybe I should say something?" I'm trying to hold strong, hope you are making it as well.
9Lives Posted June 29, 2007 Posted June 29, 2007 Wow, talk about my situation near verbatim: too many fights, breakup, NC, random e-mail from him, wondering whether or not to respond... That was three weeks ago for me, and I eventually did respond. The curiosity killed me. My ex and I met up (the reason why he e-mailed me). Surprisingly, seeing him brought me quite a bit more closure. Afterwards, I didn't wonder how soon he would call or text or talk to me again. It didn't really matter anymore. Of course, then comes the next cycle that I'm feeling right now. "Well, maybe he will say something again...? Maybe I should say something?" I'm trying to hold strong, hope you are making it as well. Hope he says nothing cause unless he is planning for your future together, what else is there to talk about
Author Chinook Posted June 29, 2007 Author Posted June 29, 2007 Hope he says nothing cause unless he is planning for your future together, what else is there to talk about Never a truer word spoken (ok, written). Unless there is a realistic chance of reconciliation and that it is a real chance at re-building, then I'm afraid I'd have to say to avoid him and maintain NC.
9Lives Posted June 29, 2007 Posted June 29, 2007 Never a truer word spoken (ok, written). Unless there is a realistic chance of reconciliation and that it is a real chance at re-building, then I'm afraid I'd have to say to avoid him and maintain NC. Yup, cause if you think about it,....why take the rollercoaster ride again. The blunge is a mother!!! I cant let MY WORLD be rocked like this again. I have alot going on that is good and I dont have time to be emotionally distraught. It is not like I dont love him or anything but we are at a serious life changing crossroad. I have to take control of my life or I will probably wind up all screwed up and hating myself for it. It took me a long time to see the light but I see it and I cant ignore it this time. It is too bright. He has not tried to contact me really anyway so I guess he is fine. oh well. That is why I am here on LS so I can get better too by helping other people and helping myself.
Author Chinook Posted July 6, 2007 Author Posted July 6, 2007 You know, lady... I had considered not coming back to Loveshack for a little while because I had thought that it wasn't helping me to let go of the pain. I worked out though that I really would like some good to come out of this mess I've found myself in the last two weeks. I would really like to help and advise others, so I decided it would benefit people for me to stay. I just need to be careful with how much I'm hanging on to my pain of my own breakup - which at times doesn't seem to be getting any easier.
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