high_boost Posted June 26, 2007 Posted June 26, 2007 just wondering if anyone else writes, and if they wrote anything when they parted with their ex. when mine cheated on me and we broke up i couldnt stop writing. it definatly helped me more than anything else. check out mine and let me know what you think or if you need any of it explained. you can even vote on it or not. doesnt matter to me. just give me your opinion on it. also ide like to hear anyone elses poem about their break up. http://www.poetry.com/voteforme/poemvote1.asp?PID=12159362
Tony T Posted June 26, 2007 Posted June 26, 2007 It's a good poem, a bit sad. It's kind of odd that so many people write excellent stuff when they are in pain. But I do think it helps a lot to get through the shock part of a break up. I'm retired from break ups...no more of them for me. I've had enough. They aren't fun. No more poetry either. The next poem I write is when I win the lottery. No chick is going to bring me down like they have in the past.
Reckless Posted June 26, 2007 Posted June 26, 2007 I enjoyed reading your poem. Yes, pain does seem to be a some kind of catalyst for good writing; Tony's comment made me go on a search for happy poems I found this one (not so much perky as positive)... maybe I'll start a thread 'happy poetry'.. hmm http://maincc.hufs.ac.kr/~mathias/poems97.htm#jan
funkybassplayer Posted June 26, 2007 Posted June 26, 2007 Playing my bass really helps me. i find i do some melodic sad sounding lines and stuff but it helps me. When im happy i play real funky bass lines.......Like now! So tony t how do you not get hurt again? p.s i agree no slushy poems! She'll read while getting f.........ked!
Shadowdog36 Posted June 27, 2007 Posted June 27, 2007 I wrote the first two 14 years ago when I first met her, and the last two some time in December, I think. Meant so much to me at the time, and helped work through some s**t. Hope you like them and find some use out of me putting them up here for all to see. VISIONS Visions Of long summer nights with you In a grassy field with just enough room For two Sometimes The emptiness inside I feel My heart cannot make real The dreams I have Sometimes The feelings I possess In my mind so true My truth a lie And yet I try All the ages I'm away Nothing but a single day And still I break down and cry Sometimes I feel guilty of my joy when you're not there My happiness to share And still I try Realism of fact..not dream Yet I always seem To keep wishing on that star Sometimes Visions Of long summer nights with you Enter into my dreams And so I try My mind reaching to hold them And make them real So I can feel The soft gentle touch of your skin In a grassy field with just enough room For two. FEAR Fear the stone left unturned Fear the things you've yet to learn Fear the thoughts deep in your mind Fear what approaches from behind Fear the feeling that everything's right Fear the loneliness at night Fear the light of the coming day Fear it still as it slips away Fear your pain and your sorrow Fear this day and tomorrow Fear your life the way you live Fear that you don't have enough to give Fear that feeling within your heart That fear can be the hardest part My greatest fear is something new Fear of living without you. SHE She's my angel when I pray She's my sunshine through the day She's my breath when I inhale She's the princess in my tale She's the breeze that keeps me cool She's my diamond, she's my jewel She's the moon that shines at night She's my everlasting light She's my priceless work of art She's the beating of my heart She's my dream when I'm asleep She's my tears when I weep She's the stars that shine above She's the reason I feel love She's been all these things and more She's the one that I adore She's in everything I see Everything but me. DO YOU? Do you lay awake at night When summer storms are cause for fright And ponder where in this world I may be? Does it fill your mind with wonder When you hear the sound of thunder If the rain is falling down on me? Do you find your mind adrift all day Whether at work or at play And see only the vision of my smile? Do you hope for just one note Any words that I wrote Just to keep you going for a while? Do you dream when you sleep That vision of us that you keep Of you and I laying side by side? And when you wake for the day And the dream fades away Do you pull the covers up and hide? Do you ask God when you pray If you can have any say In just what it is He wants from you? Because I'd have one simple task That I'd really want to ask Please God, make her feel like I do.
EricOnTheWeb Posted June 27, 2007 Posted June 27, 2007 I wrote this just a few weeks ago....It's not for a breakup,but rather why my life is like it is and my struggles with accepting to live alone. I wrote this with the teachings of a great friend(Zona76) This was spoken from deep emotion that night. "*************************************************** I stand here on the shore trying to just ignore,but what am I ignoring? I'm deep in thought of what my life is now or what it should of been,a girl for me to love and an airforce pilot she could love back. Thats the thought I hold true and someday I wish I could know you. I open my eyes and soon realize,that it was only a thought,a wish,a dream...My life is lonely and hopes have passed. *****************************************************
Author high_boost Posted June 27, 2007 Author Posted June 27, 2007 nice writing guys! keep em commin.
Zona76 Posted July 5, 2007 Posted July 5, 2007 This written today. I write a lot. Normally I Rhyme and this is out of my realm I need a critique on this. Please advise. (PM if you can) Have you ever felt we're in a bubble? We make our lives invisible yet unaware we're on display? Have you ever wondered if they knew? These pictures we create and see within ourselves. Am I wrong to want them to know? To understand this glory and wonder. This power we hold. They watch the tableau, view it as obscene for they can't ever know this to be real... This what we feel. And we share, and we give, and we project into tomorrow. We think it can't get better than this and yet it still grows. Lets soar with other spirits like ours. Lets fly away. Lets join the clouds to be one.
Zona76 Posted July 5, 2007 Posted July 5, 2007 I was once in poetry.com. DON'T be duped into buying their book that contains hundreds of poems only to see yourself in print. If you are serious about writing I can connect you to a publisher that will publish your work. And publish for no fee. You don't get much money unless you sell a lot of books. I wrote a childrens story. And I am given 2 free copies. That's all I wanted was to see it in print... I'm not allowed to type the web page for this site but you can PM me.
Author high_boost Posted July 5, 2007 Author Posted July 5, 2007 thanks for lookin out for me. i dont by crap off those types of sites. just tryin to win a free ipod thats all!!!! i have written hundreds of all types of poems, but i just do it to pass time usually. not that serious about it i guess but it sounds like that site is worth checkin out. i have a friend in england that writes stories so maybe it'll help her out as well. thanks alot!
Author high_boost Posted July 5, 2007 Author Posted July 5, 2007 im not sure you can pm on this site. or maybe im retarded?? i cant seem to figure it out. anyway thats the way i write most of the time. i almost never rhyme. i will throw in a few every now and then but its rare. it makes what i write feel more personal to me. the 2nd line in the poem seems out of place to me , but that might be because its in your head not mine. its good none the less. i wrote a really weird one today on my cell phone. i need to go over it and patch it up a bit and then i'll post it up. This written today. I write a lot. Normally I Rhyme and this is out of my realm I need a critique on this. Please advise. (PM if you can) Have you ever felt we're in a bubble? We make our lives invisible yet unaware we're on display? Have you ever wondered if they knew? These pictures we create and see within ourselves. Am I wrong to want them to know? To understand this glory and wonder. This power we hold. They watch the tableau, view it as obscene for they can't ever know this to be real... This what we feel. And we share, and we give, and we project into tomorrow. We think it can't get better than this and yet it still grows. Lets soar with other spirits like ours. Lets fly away. Lets join the clouds to be one.
Zona76 Posted July 6, 2007 Posted July 6, 2007 They may zap me for telling you. But the key in the PM's is in your profile page. First is to chose if you want to be visible. Left unchecked people wont know if you are online. We all start with not being able to PM. You have to turn it on. You have to access this ability. I only saw it once. I carefully went over everything in my profile page and found it. Now it's on, I can turn it off. The choice is still mine.
Zona76 Posted July 6, 2007 Posted July 6, 2007 The poem is in the imagining. When you fall in love part of you wants the world to know and part wants you to conceal it. Keep it safe and secure. I think in this second line I refer to myself in a time when I was in an internet romance(we're married now) The whole of this is a symbolism. I feel so much so deep how is it that others can't see or feel it too?
Fortune'sFool Posted July 11, 2007 Posted July 11, 2007 I too began writing, I decided to try something different (I used to take out my frustrations, anger, etc on anyone around me...) It is wrong i know.. (guess i have finally grown up) but i have learned that writing is a much better way for me (and my friends and family) to deal with things... Here is a few of the many poems I have written: My Reflection Kreg_02-09-07 From across the room i saw her A stranger standing alone I noticed she'd been weeping As she stood there on her own She had given up on love and life This was obvious to see I read her lips as she said to herself, "How could he do this to me?" I wondered had he broken her heart Did he pull it out and then tear it apart? Her hurt was displayed like a work of art I decided to walk on over To lend her a friendly ear That's when i realized that stranger was my reflection in the mirror Haunted kreg_03-30-07 Desperately holding on to our future plans Like a little girl squeezing a baloon's string in her hand I knew it was wrong and a sin not to mention But i dove in head first didn't question nor listen And by crossing that line so selfishly, I let down my guard and you betrayed me You lied when you called me the love of your life It was proven when i found out you still slept with your wife Foolishly believing, "you're all I have ever wanted!" And to this day still, by those six words I'm haunted! Empty Promises kreg_01-29-07 Once again it has happened you didn't keep your word Now you try using empty promises and you sound so absurd Because of you, my hearts been shattered and all i can see, is to you, it doesn't matter You want me to believe in you when you say, you'll never say good bye There's one thing you proven to me ...That words you speak are only lies There really is no reason for me to keep hanging on We'd both be better off If you'd just stay gone Well... I guess i have my answer I now know where i stand. Was playing me for a fool all part of your plan? I have said this before...and i'm telling you now Start showing me respect ... Or you can go to hell!
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