brandie32 Posted June 25, 2007 Posted June 25, 2007 Hello All, So my question is how do I fix this mess I am in. I realy like this guy and I thaught after 4 dates it was ok to have sex. In hind site way to soon should have had a converstsion or two sbout expectations. But we seemed to have a good thing going. We spoke everyday sometimes 2x a day and spoke about double dating and him meeting my sister. So One night we had sex and seems to me all changed. We had sex agin and we definitly hae not gotten closer. My gut says walk a way with lesson learned. But just coming out of a long relationship, been on couple of dates and finally meeting this guy that I really like. I really would like to fix what I have done. the weird thing that I keep going back to is sex is not a bad thing, and I do not sleep around I just felt really close to him. But what do I do to fix this, suggestions? I am planning on calling him to see if he would like to come over for dinner on Wednesday night? Is that not a good idea, should I not bring anything up and just go with the flow?
Tony T Posted June 25, 2007 Posted June 25, 2007 Just go with the flow. What kind of an emotional bond can be formed in four dates? You're going to have to use your own keen judgment to repair this over a period of time. Unfortunately, he may be expecting sex on a regular basis now. It doesn't sound like he has the emotion into it. You don't really either. You may be simply using him in unconscious ways to get some of what you may have missed or may be missing from your previous relationship...but it's all in your head. You probably aren't even aware you're doing so. At this point, you don't even know what his reaction would be to a talk. It's much too early to have an intimate talk about the two of you. Right now, sex is for sport. You're wanting more. It may be the best idea for you to step back from this and assess just where you think he is and go from there. Having some kind of deep talk about where the relationship is and where it's going at this point would be way, way premature. Give you're not long out of a long relationship, give yourself some time. When you are vulnerable, that's when you can make some of the biggest mistakes and end up with people who are very wrong for you.
Recommended Posts