LoveLace Posted June 25, 2007 Posted June 25, 2007 The girl he almost married was not "small" (and she left HIM, not the other way around)...but he has a major thing for girls that are petite and skinny. I'm always told I'm hot, but I'm not petite, I am fit and medium sized, and I'm shaped like an "hour glass". I know that everyone has different tastes...but if it seems a majority of guys find me attractive, why wouldn't he? Does ultimately matter if a guy falls in love?
oavada Posted June 25, 2007 Posted June 25, 2007 it doesnt really matter i dont think when youre really connected with each other..i like petite women better too but i once almost married a woman that was 200 lbs. because we had this connection..so, it shouldnt make much of a difference, and its not like youre gigantic.
McFadden Posted June 25, 2007 Posted June 25, 2007 I think usually people can get past those preferences if they love someone, BUT, why would you want a man who prefers petite women? Usually those kind of men are insecure wimps that don't think they can handle a real woman.
rainfall Posted June 25, 2007 Posted June 25, 2007 I think usually people can get past those preferences if they love someone, BUT, why would you want a man who prefers petite women? Usually those kind of men are insecure wimps that don't think they can handle a real woman. How exactly does a women being petite make her not a real women? But to the OP yeah I would think a guy can always change what he prefers if their is a strong enough connection there.
Trialbyfire Posted June 25, 2007 Posted June 25, 2007 How exactly does a women being petite make her not a real women? But to the OP yeah I would think a guy can always change what he prefers if their is a strong enough connection there. I agree with both comments. A strong connection tends to supercede the rest. Hopefully you've had or will have the opportunity to get to know him. If a man is solely driven by physical stats, I would say he's not worth the time wasted.
McFadden Posted June 25, 2007 Posted June 25, 2007 I agree with what's been said. Everyone has thier physical ideals, but that isn't the only thing that matters, and if it is that's a problem. Oh I wasn't that serious about the second part of my reply and I definitely think petite women are real women.. but actually, I have noticed that there is a correlation between men liking petite women and liking submissive women. I'm not saying petite women are more submissive, I'm talking about whats in the man's head. In some cases if a man is insistant about only dating petite women its because he is hung up on the woman being smaller than him which I think is silly. (My POV is coming from a taller athletic girl who has experienced some, uh, discrimination because of this.) Has anyone else noticed the correlation or am I totally off the mark?
KittenMoon Posted June 25, 2007 Posted June 25, 2007 A preference is not universal. I like tall, skinny guys, but I've been mad attracted to shorter, normal guys. It is a red flag, IMO, if a person EXCLUSIVELY dates a single body type and never considers others, because that might indicate some sort of hang-up related to that look of person (for example, a deep-seated attempt to re-create a prior relationship with a similar looking person, or some sort of mommy/daddy issue). But since this guy has dated non-petite women, that doesn't quite sound like the case. P.S. "Petite" doesn't necessarily mean centerfold skinny bikini wanna-be model chicks- petite can just mean he likes small featured short girls.
Author LoveLace Posted June 25, 2007 Author Posted June 25, 2007 Thanks for replies. I feel a bit better because of them. I already have a very strong connection with him actually...he is my roommate and we are best friends. I've never let his physical standards get me down before; but lately we've gotten closer and I've been happy about it until he mentioned a girl from his work that he wants to "f*ck". Then I visited his work the other night and saw her, without even looking for her on purpose, and she was so small and skinny. I'm no amazon chick but I felt like one at the moment. I keep telling myself I know he cares about me way more than her or any girl...but I guess it doesn't mean he finds me attractive...oh well thanks again!
directx Posted June 25, 2007 Posted June 25, 2007 The features I find attractive on women are mostly due to special women in my past that had those features. In other words, I relate the features I like because of the woman, not the other way around. I wouldnt get too hung up on this.
GoodOnPaper Posted June 25, 2007 Posted June 25, 2007 In my experience, a personal connection does trump attraction (or lack of) based on surface features. While I didn't date a lot of women, those I did had body types all over the map. My wife's weight goes back and forth between 240-270 pounds, but her body has a great hourglass shape, and she has a very feminine personality. Because of my connection with her, over time I've found that curves and chests draw my eye much more so than skinny, petite figures. I second directx's opinion -- emotional connection definitely drives feature preferences.
Author LoveLace Posted June 26, 2007 Author Posted June 26, 2007 I want for him to think I'm as hot as it seems other guys do..I try to show off my best features, like my legs so I just wear shorts a lot, or something like that...I like it if he sees me when I get ready for a big night out, all dressed up, etc. I can't say I've never caught him checking me out. But I think with him, I might always be too insecure about the thinner gals to be a good girlfriend for him!
Starry-eyed Posted June 26, 2007 Posted June 26, 2007 Oh I wasn't that serious about the second part of my reply and I definitely think petite women are real women.. but actually, I have noticed that there is a correlation between men liking petite women and liking submissive women. I'm not saying petite women are more submissive, I'm talking about whats in the man's head. In some cases if a man is insistant about only dating petite women its because he is hung up on the woman being smaller than him which I think is silly. (My POV is coming from a taller athletic girl who has experienced some, uh, discrimination because of this.) Has anyone else noticed the correlation or am I totally off the mark? I'm petite and I haven't noticed this. I don't feel anyone I've dated has wanted me to be or expected me to be submissive. Maybe my experiences are unusual. To Lovelace, I have your opposite "problem." I am dating a guy who is very tall and has almost always dated medium-height or tall women. I don't know if he's ever dated someone as short, or petite, as I, and I wonder if that has any bearing on the relationship. Like, do you really get set on a size or type?
doiask42much Posted June 26, 2007 Posted June 26, 2007 While I think a lot of people have a "type," your ideas of what you are attracted to can change over time as you correlate them with certain experiences and past relationships. I am petite but my bf's last gf was very athletic, like him, and somewhat muscular and stocky from sports. For a long time he preferred an athletic build and to him I was lacking in fitness and tone. I thought him overly stocky and not thin enough, but in time my tastes have shifted and so have his. My poorly made point is that I think these things tend to normalize with time and you come to be attracted to the physical traits of the person you love, even if they were not your ideal to start with, and the impact can last beyond that relationship.
Author LoveLace Posted June 26, 2007 Author Posted June 26, 2007 I'm petite and I haven't noticed this. I don't feel anyone I've dated has wanted me to be or expected me to be submissive. Maybe my experiences are unusual. To Lovelace, I have your opposite "problem." I am dating a guy who is very tall and has almost always dated medium-height or tall women. I don't know if he's ever dated someone as short, or petite, as I, and I wonder if that has any bearing on the relationship. Like, do you really get set on a size or type? I am not set on a size or shape myself...but I am a "butt" girl...I don't necessarily know what defines a nice butt, just know I like them! But as far as dating, I've always tended to be more attracted to dark-haired men, but my high school sweet heart was almost white blonde...so I guess that confirms what everyone says here... I do also know I have a thing for men with meat on their bones, a little plump if you will...but it doesn't mean Mr. Right won't end up skinny! So I guess the guy in question here might feel the same way about girls my size vs. petite women...he might find himself attracted to that a lot, but it doesn't mean he couldn't grow to love a different type...
McFadden Posted June 26, 2007 Posted June 26, 2007 Right, the guy OP was talking about just sounds like he has a preference, not like he will rule out anyone outside that preference. Nothing wrong with that. I was just talking about guys who will not date larger women which is a different thing entirely. I should probably start my own thread, 'why won't some guys date tall women *shaking fist*.' Lol.
Author LoveLace Posted June 26, 2007 Author Posted June 26, 2007 His Ex didn't really have curves at all...but she was tall and top-heavy, I guess that's why he considers her "big"...me on the other hand, is very curvy but I'm somewhere between short and tall; and I'm barely a B cup!
halfarock Posted June 26, 2007 Posted June 26, 2007 BUT, why would you want a man who prefers petite women? Usually those kind of men are insecure wimps that don't think they can handle a real woman. I have noticed that there is a correlation between men liking petite women and liking submissive women. I'm not saying petite women are more submissive, I'm talking about whats in the man's head. In some cases if a man is insistant about only dating petite women its because he is hung up on the woman being smaller than him which I think is silly… Has anyone else noticed the correlation or am I totally off the mark? You are totally off the mark.
doiask42much Posted June 26, 2007 Posted June 26, 2007 So what is your take, Halfarock? Just curious.
Topper Posted June 26, 2007 Posted June 26, 2007 I agree with what's been said. Everyone has their physical ideals, but that isn't the only thing that matters, and if it is that's a problem. Oh I wasn't that serious about the second part of my reply and I definitely think petite women are real women.. but actually, I have noticed that there is a correlation between men liking petite women and liking submissive women. I'm not saying petite women are more submissive, I'm talking about whats in the man's head. In some cases if a man is insistent about only dating petite women its because he is hung up on the woman being smaller than him which I think is silly. (My POV is coming from a taller athletic girl who has experienced some, uh, discrimination because of this.) Has anyone else noticed the correlation or am I totally off the mark? You are totally off the mark. I would say that most woman at least those posting on Dating sites want a man that is taller then her. I'm 5'8" I'm not short side. the ads I see are usually for men 5'10 or better. I have dated woman from about 5'0" to an extremely beautiful woman of 5'10'" her sister had been featured in Playboy, I thought Kathy was better looking then her sister. When Kathy put on high heels and we would do a slow dance I was in Heaven.
Author LoveLace Posted June 26, 2007 Author Posted June 26, 2007 You are totally off the mark. I would say that most woman at least those posting on Dating sites want a man that is taller then her. I'm 5'8" I'm not short side. the ads I see are usually for men 5'10 or better. I have dated woman from about 5'0" to an extremely beautiful woman of 5'10'" her sister had been featured in Playboy, I thought Kathy was better looking then her sister. When Kathy put on high heels and we would do a slow dance I was in Heaven. AWWW
Aussie65 Posted June 27, 2007 Posted June 27, 2007 I like big butts and I can not lie You other brothers can't deny That when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist And a round thing in your face umm yeah well...hey if he likes them find a friend thats bigger..works every time honestly hun,if the guy is into you then size should not matter...it's what comes from the heart.
Tranzphasic0 Posted June 27, 2007 Posted June 27, 2007 a real woman is a big burly biker chick that can snap men in half over her knee..yeah go team
cutegirl Posted June 27, 2007 Posted June 27, 2007 Personally I would not date a guy that has fetishes I can't fulfill. For example some guys love big butts and I know I'll never have a big bubble butt... Some guys like latinas and I can never be one... I would always be worried in the back of my mind that he would cheat with his "fetish" type... Some guys will cheat in a relationship with prostitutes to fulfill their fetishes. I would be wary personally...
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