Author oavada Posted June 26, 2007 Author Posted June 26, 2007 Oavada, I am hesitant to even respond to you. You definately have a wall. Some of your opinions which you are very much entitled to have, are (and you know that they are) at the very least ...off putting to others. You study Zen and Buddism. Wouldn't those beautiful teachings tell you to look within and discover the beauty within? To find an inner peace? I find it contradictory then the stuggle/conflict you possess between inner beauty and outer beauty. Perhaps your next journey should entail seeking a way to combine those two things so that your outward appearance is enhanced (not reduced) by what you think and feel inwards. BTW, are you a Scorpio? Regards, Unders i never said i studied zen..just where did you get that or is this more assumptions from chatters? and as far as offending people, i dont care..i say what i believe regardless of who it offends..im not going to bow down to popular herd mentality like a coward..sorry... As far as buddhism goes tho , f you do meditation long enough you will develop a repulsion for the body... in fact heres a quote from the buddhist suttas: "Everything that oozes out of the body is foul and smells. Give up this body bound for the grave." Ive talked to lamas and swamis in hindu schools, etc. and some of them tell me that its natural for a religious minded person to want to avoid human contact he thinks is disgusting...think about it...kissing and having sex is digusting...its foul and theres any number of diseases you can get, youre exchanging bodily fluids all the time...it is a disgusting endeavour. It isnt pure activity.. heres another one: "Whoever doesnt have disgust for this rotten body isnt a true sannyasin(ie renunciate)" -Buddha I could post these quotes all night too..Part of the practice is developing a sense of disgust for the rotten body which is full of sickness, disease and suffering according to buddhism. and yes, im a scorpio..
Author oavada Posted June 26, 2007 Author Posted June 26, 2007 I read your other post about wanting to know what people look like and how attractive people are more valuable as a whole. Strange that you hold such high standards for others when you are, by your own admission, grossed out by your own body and teeth. Or perhaps not. What is your cultural background? You commented on liking Asian women but finding Western women domineering, overly educated, and masculinized. I NEVER claimed "attractive people are more valuable as a whole" Never did i say that...thats yet ANOTHER, god theres been at least fifty, fifty one with unders zen thing, strawman fallacy. Im european...european ancestry...and yes i do find the western women overly domineering, unsubmissive and generally very contentious in relationships...asian girls for the most part are very family oriented and submissive...western women, especially with the way theyre taught these days, are hyper feminist crusaders that completely turns me off.
VIP Posted June 26, 2007 Posted June 26, 2007 I see a contradiction in your thoughts. You regret not being able to communicate with others and have a physical contact due to the fact, that you hate your body. So it follows from this, that you would like to have a better body or to learn to accept your body, so you could have better interaction with people. Your ideas of hating your body are not your personal beliefs, they are some ideas you borrowed from books. Let me tell you, the true religiousness doesn't come from books, it comes from your own experience. You are your own Buddha and your body is a temple, which carries this immortal spirit. There's no need to hate, your body is beautiful and divine, like everything else in the Universe.
StartingOver07 Posted June 26, 2007 Posted June 26, 2007 there was a point in my life, 23-27 where i felt comfortable and happy with sex, but i cant imagine myself ever being comfortable being nude and having sex face to face with a woman again...thats kind of sad to me because i really do want and enjoy sex and relationships... its like im an old man at 33 lol..anyone else think this way or is it just my weird self? The statement above, which is what you started this thread with, suggests something quite different from your more recent statements, which imply that you are content with your views. If you are getting bad advice, it may be because you are sending mixed messages.
doiask42much Posted June 26, 2007 Posted June 26, 2007 You said that you personally valued that opinions and tastes of attractive women and that the time of attractive people is more valued, in that they get paid to show up places. I think you cited Paris as an example? I think you just like saying strawman fallacy. You don't have to say something explicitly, word for word, to have said it, you know.
kimba Posted June 26, 2007 Posted June 26, 2007 Human beings are social animals. It is well documented that people who live alone combined with having lack of physical contact- whether its even simple hugging- have a shorter life span. i think you need to get out in the sun a bit more. Are you in a cold climate? Dark skies??? I think that where your beliefs are coming from has nothing to do with any ancient spiritual teachings. I think that you have isolated yourself for so long that you have developed some kind of super ego where you may actually think you are superior to us kissing/ hugging/ touching/ mere mortals. You will not survive for very long carrying on like this. It does sound like you have some form of depression. It is very sad that you have got yourself into this. It is like the illness has taken over and is convincing you that you are right and you have lost rational thought. Please take some steps to go and talk to a counsellor about this.
jcster Posted June 26, 2007 Posted June 26, 2007 you guys...I really, truly think the guy is nuts. Should we have another 400 million page discussion where he jerks us back and forth and insults us? I'm just saying.... Personally, I'm gonna hit "ignore posts" on this guy from now on. peace.
The Velvet Vixen Posted July 7, 2007 Posted July 7, 2007 The original poster probably isn't even around anymore, but I'd like to post anyway, because this sounds urgent. To me it sounds exactly like a mix of Social Anxiety and Body Dysmorphic Disorder. I think the reason he sounds conflicted is because he is conflicted on the inside. He has all these horrible feelings about himself that make his life "hell," as he said, but at the same time, he doesn't want to believe that there's anything wrong with him, which is why he seeks out teaches from other cultures that will convince him that he's normal. Based on the first post in this thread, and his words anyone else think this way or is it just my weird self? he really just wanted some confirmation that there was nothing in fact wrong with him. When posters implied otherwise, he lashed out at them. I think he lashes out at others out of confusion, just as he lashes out at himself, rather than out of malice. I think there's something definitely wrong here. It's not someone simply bothered by his appearance as most are. This is an actual obsession that consumes his thoughts. If he were still around, I'd insist he get help as others above had recommended to him. I don't think it matters much what other cultures do or do not do, since he's living in this culture at this time, and he's suffering. As a human being, I assume his ultimate goal is happiness. If he's not happy with his situation, it's best to change it.
The Velvet Vixen Posted July 7, 2007 Posted July 7, 2007 BTW, oavada, one may not necessarily have to take medication for such things these days. Do some research on Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. I once knew a guy who withdrew so much that he hadn't left his house at all in about ten years, and I suspect, never will again. This is why I think getting help is important....
jcster Posted July 7, 2007 Posted July 7, 2007 I think he lashes out at others out of confusion, just as he lashes out at himself, rather than out of malice. Maybe.... read his other posts, though.
The Velvet Vixen Posted July 7, 2007 Posted July 7, 2007 Maybe.... read his other posts, though. I read some of his posts after I posted in this thread, and I'm not going to comment, lol, except to say that it's probably fortunate that I didn't read them until after. I always assume, anyway, that a lot of people I post to might have opinions very different from mine, attitudes I don't necessarily like, or may be people I might not get along with in real life, but I try not to take those things into consideration if/when I'm advising them. Try, but not always successful...so if I'd read them before, I would have had difficulty remaining neutral or, more likely, wouldn't have responded at all. There are a lot of people who suffer from the same type of obsessions and anxieties he described, so maybe if they recognize themselves in his posts in this thread, they'll see that there are solutions, and won't end up like that guy I mentioned who hasn't left his house since graduating from high school.
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