Treadstone Posted June 22, 2007 Posted June 22, 2007 Hey people, I'm at a crossroad and I could use some advice and inputs from y'all. About a month ago, I was entering my condo when i noticed this gorgeous lady exit from her SUV in front of the building. She made it to the door first, opened it and held it for me until I got there. I said thanks and whilst we were in the elevator I asked her if she was new to the building. She indicated in the affirmative so we started some small talk about the building until I got to my floor. I introduced myself and she did likewise. A couple of days later, I saw a "for sale" sign on her vehicle with her number on it. I called her up and asked if i could test drive it (it wasn't a ploy, i was really interested in test-driving it). The next evening she came down to knock on my door so we can go for the test-drive. I let her in whilst I went to the bedroom to change. When I came out, she complimented how clean and well-decorated my place is and and how she likes my open lay-out plan better than hers. She said a few things about her lay-out and invited me to come up and see it later if i want. We went for the test-drive for about an hour and it was quite fun even though she seemed tired from the day's activities. We had a good conversation and as it turned out she and her live-in b/f of 2 years just broke up and he moved out a few weeks ago. I also found out that we had a few other things in common. We both went to the same university and pursued the same program. She graduated a year before me. We've both started our careers. She admitted to being interested in a few of the things that I said I was interested in especially jogging and walking down alongside a river close by our building. We talked about our families etc. All in all it was relaxing, natural and fun. No significant tense moments. When we returned, I went up to see her place and I was quite impress by it too. I decided to leave after a while so she can relax. We both agreed to get together sometime and have tea or wine in either of our balconies or go out jogging. She gave me a good hug (not an ass-out) and I left. A few days later, I called her up and left her a message but she didn't call back. I waited a week, called her and left a message again but again she didn't return my call. I therefore decided to lay low until i ran into her a week later at the entrance. We talked for a while in the elevator and she said she'd got my messages but then she hasn't returned my calls because she's been busy helping a friend organize a wedding. I said that's alright but then I'll still be expecting her to return my call when she can. She said she would but then I shouldn't expect it for a couple more days because her mom will be visiting the next day (mom lives in a different city). She never called until i ran into her again at the same entrance a week later. I was exiting and she was entering. She stopped and we talked for about 5 mins. This time I didn't mention anything about a call at all but then she came out to say that her mom has been visiting all along and that she only left the day before. I said I needed to get to the library to pick up some books before it closed so I rushed off. I've still never heard from her but this evening i saw her exiting the building with a female friend. She did not see me and I made no effort to draw her attention. Should I forget about this girl or should I call her one more time? I like her and will like to get to know her but at the same time I'm not sure if her refusal to return my calls are a symptom of disinterest. I'm a fairly confident guy and I don't mind the act of pursuing a woman if I think she shows signs of interest. However, I don't her to feel that I'm harassing her if she's not interested.
Art_Critic Posted June 22, 2007 Posted June 22, 2007 She is blowing you off... don't even think of continuing to contact her.. and an hour test drive.. that was a scheme to get to know her and nothing more...I'll bet she figured out that you were using the SUV as an in and didn't think that was cool.. either that or she is getting back with her ex and you are the backup guy.. either way you have been blown off nicely... Show some class and blow her off at this point
Author Treadstone Posted June 22, 2007 Author Posted June 22, 2007 Thank you for your quick input. I appreciate your sincerity. By the way, the test drive took that long because we followed the route that she suggested. Either way, you could be right. So what do you suggest if I ran into her again? Refuse to acknowledge her and walk past her?
UT_longhorn Posted June 22, 2007 Posted June 22, 2007 I'd say give her a beaming smile, a nice hello, and go about your daily business.
UT_longhorn Posted June 22, 2007 Posted June 22, 2007 as it turned out she and her live-in b/f of 2 years just broke up and he moved out a few weeks ago. it's too soon for her to even think about dating. might even be the reason the mom was at her place..for emotional support.
jcster Posted June 22, 2007 Posted June 22, 2007 I think it's just bad timing for her. I would be friendly, maybe invite her to do some low key things, such as taking that walk by the river. Keep conversation light and not too personal. If you really want to date her, you want to get to know her without ending up in the "friend zone." In a few months, she might be ready to date again - but right now, her life is in total flux and unless you just want to be a rebound, you're going to have to wait.
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