Maxine Posted June 21, 2007 Posted June 21, 2007 This is my first post. I have been with my boyfriend for a year. I am 35 he is 37 and we get along great. We see alot of each other and he stays at my house at least 3-4 times a week. Sometimes more, sometimes less but even if we do not see each other we speak loads on the phone. My problem is this, we have not has sex for nearly 2 weeks. My son was away at camp for 5 days last week and he spent the week working and helping me decorated my sons room as a surprise for when he got back. We was tired most nights but for that whole five days, we had sex once! Although we did kiss and cuddle when in bed, it just didnt progress to sex. We had a rare opportunity to make as much noise as we wanted and we didnt! Since then we have not had sex and he has not stayed once this week as he was busy, but I know in my heart that he made himself busy. I have spoken to him loads on the phone and made some comments to him. We were joking about with innuendos and he mention how hard it gets and I said "Its been so long, i have forgot" to which he laughed. I even asked him if he still fancies me as we dont seem to be making love and he said that we were both tired as we were decorating until late every night (true) and our relationship is not just about sex and that there is alot more to us than sex. He said he thinks I am gorgeous and that he still fancies the pants off me. He looked convincing when he said it. Is this normal? He was talking about saving for a holiday in September so I do not think he is thinking of finishing with me but it is making me feel awful about myself and I really think he is going off of me sexually!
Lizzie60 Posted June 21, 2007 Posted June 21, 2007 When you were in bed, cuddling and kissing, did you initiate sex... did you make a move to let him know you were horny. 1) Maybe he was tired.. but I know lots of 'tired guys' who miraculously find energy when they are aroused. 2) Maybe you have bad breath... I know it sounds rude but I'm dead serious... I have been with amazing guys, really good looking but their breath ....OMG... that's a huge turn-off... he might be too 'polite' to tell you... and he doesn't want to hurt you or make you mad at him. You should have an open, honest discussion with him... bring the breath issue just to make sure it's not that... let him open up...
ross37 Posted June 21, 2007 Posted June 21, 2007 maybe hes waiting on you to make the first move when you want sex. I do that sometimes with my gf. I try and wait for her to make some sort of mood. I'm sure even if hes tired, he'll come around to waking up for sex (atleast i do anyway)
Author Maxine Posted June 21, 2007 Author Posted June 21, 2007 Hahahhaha I cant ask him if my breathe stinks!!!!! Plus I brush my teeth when I go to bed so I know it doesnt!
Lizzie60 Posted June 21, 2007 Posted June 21, 2007 Hahahhaha I cant ask him if my breathe stinks!!!!! Plus I brush my teeth when I go to bed so I know it doesnt! why not... he's your bf.. not a stranger... nothing wrong with discussing that issue... gosh ... what will you do if 'sensitive' issues come up and you need to address them. Plus the fact that you brush your teeth has nothing to do with badbreath... really it doesn't.
Lizzie60 Posted June 21, 2007 Posted June 21, 2007 In another forum... I read about the same problem... I gave the same advice... she later posted that she had the talk with her husband and it was her breath... she was completely stunned... Unless someone tells you you have bad breath, you don't know... most of the time.
Author Maxine Posted June 22, 2007 Author Posted June 22, 2007 I was actually hoping for some constructive advice Obviously this is not the place to get it!
Goobernix Posted June 22, 2007 Posted June 22, 2007 Only 2 weeks? 2 weeks would be a blessing for me. I am now on a month! Have you tried to make a move? If I don't make a move nothing is done at all! We have been together almost 3 years and I Would say we have had sex probably about 30 times max. If your open with him about it it might be fine. I have tried open, but if its not one things its another.
dbtmarley Posted June 22, 2007 Posted June 22, 2007 I was actually hoping for some constructive advice Obviously this is not the place to get it! What did you want us to tell you? That he is screwing every woman in town. It has been two weeks, give the poor guy the benefit of the doubt. Oh and sex should not be an esteem builder in my opinion (see below): He was talking about saving for a holiday in September so I do not think he is thinking of finishing with me but it is making me feel awful about myself and I really think he is going off of me sexually! Judging from this post I bet you are a very demanding person. Advice? Tell him this, Thomas from Loveshack.com said to head for the hills.. after he finishes painting your son's room of course;).
Author Maxine Posted June 22, 2007 Author Posted June 22, 2007 What did you want us to tell you? That he is screwing every woman in town. It has been two weeks, give the poor guy the benefit of the doubt. Oh and sex should not be an esteem builder in my opinion (see below): Judging from this post I bet you are a very demanding person. Advice? Tell him this, Thomas from Loveshack.com said to head for the hills.. after he finishes painting your son's room of course;). Thanks that was wonderful advice! :rolleyes:
underpants Posted June 22, 2007 Posted June 22, 2007 Ha, I remember happening upon an episode of Everyone Loves Raymond where the husband decides to 'wait it out' to make his wife crazy, insecure, and ultimately she discovered what he was up to and played back. It was a funny episode. I don't know if this would work, but it might be funny. Next time you two are alone in the house, put on a sexy teddy, or hell, just walk around completely naked as if nothing is out of the ordinary. Go about painting, or cooking or whatever and just see what he does. If he says "what are you doing?", just respond with "what do you mean?" and then promptly bend over in front of him to pick up whatever you purposefully drop. I think it would be funny, mix things up a bit, and I would almost guarentee that he would do you. Good luck, Unders
Recommended Posts