frustrated_dude Posted June 21, 2007 Posted June 21, 2007 I live in NY which is a "fair and equitable" distribution state. From what I have read, this doesn't mean 50-50. Just wondering what can be expected. 60-40, 70-30, etc. ? Background: Married 8 years, no kids, both work, I make roughly 4 times as much money. No abuse or infidelity. We have our own credit cards and separate bank accounts. I paid for everything except the monthly phone, cable tv bill and her personal credit card. All assets aquired during marriage, house, savings, 401k, business partnership I want to be fair and not have a war, but I don't see how 50-50 or even 60-40 is fair. I've been paying all the bills for all these years, cooking and cleaning for myself. We are trying mediation. I want to avoid lawyers. What can I expect ?
sumdude Posted June 21, 2007 Posted June 21, 2007 I live in NY which is a "fair and equitable" distribution state. From what I have read, this doesn't mean 50-50. Just wondering what can be expected. 60-40, 70-30, etc. ? Background: Married 8 years, no kids, both work, I make roughly 4 times as much money. No abuse or infidelity. We have our own credit cards and separate bank accounts. I paid for everything except the monthly phone, cable tv bill and her personal credit card. All assets aquired during marriage, house, savings, 401k, business partnership I want to be fair and not have a war, but I don't see how 50-50 or even 60-40 is fair. I've been paying all the bills for all these years, cooking and cleaning for myself. We are trying mediation. I want to avoid lawyers. What can I expect ? Just went through this myself on a smaller scale. Essentially all assets and liabilies (debts) that are aquired during the duration of the marriage are pretty much considered marital property. Credtors don't parictularly care about that, just whose name is on the account. Talk to a lawyer about it, get an hour or two consultation. Don't sign anything and don't let the lawyers fight it out yet. If you to to the point where you're in court and the judge decides who gets what you're paying a lot of lawyer fees. Judges do try to balance who made more money and who paid for more of the assets. The two of you need to negotiate out of court where possible .... try to wait past the early emotional stages of a separation/divorce before you do. There are mediation attorneys that work for both of you as well as divorce financial specialists. Start looking them up. Don't rush this part of things..
Topper Posted June 21, 2007 Posted June 21, 2007 I have no idea what the device laws are in NY. In like you I paid all the mortgage payments Insurance and more. Yet when it came time to split assets that was not even considered. Don't even say the words I want to be fair to you. Her idea of fair and your idea could be worlds apart.
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