little miss grumpy Posted June 20, 2007 Posted June 20, 2007 ok! so its a really lame thing to be annoyed about but i have just been on my O/H's computer...looking for some music i downloaded so i could transfer it on to the laptop. About 2 weeks ago we had had a conversation about me feeling uncomfy bout him having and watching porn on his computer...he didnt really understand just compared it to me watching horror films and i freaked!, i only know he was watching them in the beginning because he admitted it when i asked. So any way he says i'll delete it straight away, walks in to the other room and soposedly does...so anyway i have just been looking for my music on his comp, i click to open a file and there it is... PORN!renamed obviously! what an arse! He has completely lied to me! i just txt him saying "just moved the music over to the laptop, had no idea where to look but eventually found it, oh and i found your porn-its good to know you wouldnt lie to me.x" im just waiting for the txt back saying "oh sorry honey, i forgot about those..." GRRRRR.....im annoyed!
Steveto Posted June 20, 2007 Posted June 20, 2007 So what..let him have his little porn collection, but I don't want to say it's ok either...he did lie..don't know why..he had no need to...if he said he would delete it..he should have..I don't understand why people feel they gotta hide things..there's a big folder that says PORN on my desktop..and another that says MOVIES and another MUSIC. When people come over..I just tell them.."hey watch you don't open the PORN folder"..most do anyway..men AND women..It's not like I watch them all the time..they're just there.. to make you happy he said he would delete them....and didn't..would you be MORE mad if he said no, I won't delete them? Maybe he just wanted to avoid an argument? I guess he's got his foot caught in his mouth...Tell him you tried to delete them, but accidentally reformatted the hard drive...oops.
Author little miss grumpy Posted June 20, 2007 Author Posted June 20, 2007 I agree, he had no need to hide it, he had no need to hide it in the beginning. I had mentioned a few times before that we ought to watch porn together-he just kinda brushed it off...i think this is why when i found it and asked him in the first place if he watched it alone it freaked me out! Lying or hiding things just do my head in, Everyone knows how much it hurts but still do it! I can honestly say i have nothing to hide and i have never lied to him, him doing this petty thing just gets me wondering if this is the tip of the iceberg...
allina Posted June 20, 2007 Posted June 20, 2007 First off, I have a hard time that you "accidentally" found the porn, people that find things on computers that shouldn't be there are usually searching for them. And porn on a computer isn't really a big deal, you didn't do the right thing by freaking out and demanding that he deletes it. Why is it such a big deal for you?
Enema Posted June 20, 2007 Posted June 20, 2007 I feel sorry for this guy. I'd lie about it too if my partner was such a nagging insecure mess. Give him a hug for me and let him know there are good women out there if he wants to get out!
disconcertainly Posted June 21, 2007 Posted June 21, 2007 I hate that my man watches porn we have had tons of talks about it. I don't mind him watching it as long as he includes me I am so up for it and perhaps participation....but he only wants to do it without me and that bothers me. I am with you that it pisses you off. I wish my man could understand that if he would not look at it without me we would have a much much much better sex life. Its hard to get into reality once you think fantasy it real.
Miss_Bee Posted June 21, 2007 Posted June 21, 2007 Ok, he lied to you about it. THAT was wrong. He shouldn't have lied about it. Was it the same ones that you found in the first place? If it was then i'd be ticked about him lying. Or maybe could he have had such a vast collection that he forgot a few that you happen to find? But .. what's wrong with your man looking at a little porn? I have no problem with it, as long as it's nothing illegal, or disturbing. There's nothing wrong with a little harmless porn IMO. Why don't you watch some with him? Hey! ya never know it might be fun :bunny:
Enema Posted June 21, 2007 Posted June 21, 2007 What's with all these women wanting to participate in the men's porn watching? It's a 3 step process. 1) Watch Porn 2) Ejaculate 3) Clean curtains It's not a terribly involved process that you can include a 2nd person in!
McFadden Posted June 21, 2007 Posted June 21, 2007 What's with all these women wanting to participate in the men's porn watching? It's a 3 step process. 1) Watch Porn 2) Ejaculate 3) Clean curtains It's not a terribly involved process that you can include a 2nd person in! A lot of men omitt step 3..
Miss_Bee Posted June 21, 2007 Posted June 21, 2007 What's with all these women wanting to participate in the men's porn watching? It's a 3 step process. 1) Watch Porn 2) Ejaculate 3) Clean curtains It's not a terribly involved process that you can include a 2nd person in! Use your imagination! It doesn't have to be some lame 3 step process... It could be more entertaining than the steps above silly.
McFadden Posted June 21, 2007 Posted June 21, 2007 Anyway just my two cents on why I think he might be uncomfortable with you offering to watch porn with him.. It can be kind of embarrassing, especially depending on what kind of porn he has. I own some porn that not only would I not be able to watch with another person, but I would be embarrassed if it anyone even ran across it. (Its stuff involving fantasy role playing with elves and other mythical creatures if anyone must know.) I'm not saying thats likely to be the exact situation but it could be something like that. Sometimes it just has to be watched alone or at least not with a significant other.
allina Posted June 21, 2007 Posted June 21, 2007 I hate that my man watches porn we have had tons of talks about it. I don't mind him watching it as long as he includes me I am so up for it and perhaps participation....but he only wants to do it without me and that bothers me. I am with you that it pisses you off. I wish my man could understand that if he would not look at it without me we would have a much much much better sex life. Its hard to get into reality once you think fantasy it real. but WHY?? Why is it wrong to do alone? That's sort of the purpose of porn, do you not like him masturbating alone either? What makes you think that he thinks the "fantasy" of porn is real? (Its stuff involving fantasy role playing with elves and other mythical creatures if anyone must know.) That's sort of awesome, especially that you admit it
McFadden Posted June 21, 2007 Posted June 21, 2007 Yeah, now I know for sure I've ruled myself out from ever going to any type of LS meet up down the line. Actually, one time a friend was over when I went on an errand and he found some of the weird stuff on my computer. He thought it was pretty funny so he went on AIM and sent it to a few people. I never heard the end of it, I'm still not showing my face around some of those people.
Miss_Bee Posted June 21, 2007 Posted June 21, 2007 Yeah, now I know for sure I've ruled myself out from ever going to any type of LS meet up down the line. Actually, one time a friend was over when I went on an errand and he found some of the weird stuff on my computer. He thought it was pretty funny so he went on AIM and sent it to a few people. I never heard the end of it, I'm still not showing my face around some of those people. Aww come on, it's not that bad, I've heard of people looking at things alot worse than that. I don't think it's anything to be ashamed of. Really. There are very few types of porn out there that really disturb me, and what you described was quite mellow if you ask me. That's a pretty horrible thing that your friend did , first of all he shouldn't have been snooping on your computer, but to actually send it to people and laugh at you? :mad: There's a place for people like that...
allina Posted June 21, 2007 Posted June 21, 2007 Yeah, now I know for sure I've ruled myself out from ever going to any type of LS meet up down the line. Actually, one time a friend was over when I went on an errand and he found some of the weird stuff on my computer. He thought it was pretty funny so he went on AIM and sent it to a few people. I never heard the end of it, I'm still not showing my face around some of those people. Aww come on don't rule yourself out of a LS meet up, I'm sure someone can sport a sexy elf suit (sorry couldn't help myself) I think as long as it's not involving anyone underage, animals or poop you're all good, nothing to be embarrassed about.
Miss_Bee Posted June 21, 2007 Posted June 21, 2007 I think as long as it's not involving anyone underage, animals or poop you're all good, nothing to be embarrassed about. Yeah that's the exact stuff i was talking about when i said disturbing. I just didn't want to say it.. Thanks Allina
katiebour Posted June 25, 2007 Posted June 25, 2007 I like porn. I usually watch it by myself and enjoy it by myself. The reason I don't get up and invite my b/f is because he has a less active libido than mine, and trying to drag him into bed or corral him into anything sexual can kill my momentary drive for an O. I've heard a lot of guys feel this way too- it's a lot easier to please yourself than it is to worry about having to please someone else. It's hard to say whether renaming or hiding the porn is really a bad thing- he obviously felt you were being unreasonable and didn't want to get rid of it. He probably figured it would be easier to lie about it and keep it than to stand up to you and state that he was keeping it. My opinion here- leave the porn on his comp alone. That's his business, and if you want to watch porn with him, buy some and pop it in the dvd player, put on some hot undies under your clothes, then sit him down on the couch and say "I've got a surprise movie for you, honey." If someone asked you to give up chocolate, and you hid it on top of the fridge, and they found it, who is being unreasonable? You, for wanting to keep it, or them, for asking you to get rid of something you obviously want?
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