Bree Posted June 19, 2007 Posted June 19, 2007 Well, so much for a good anniversary. There has been a girl that has called all week trying to get a hold of my boyfriend on my phone. Which pisses me off to no end. And it's all because he decided to be stupid on day and just call her out of the blue, so that how she has my number. Swears he just called for a number, yet was on the phone for a while. Lies!! but before that he lied about calling any girls, then he said he called one, then she called my phone so that made it two. More Lies!!!! Saturday night we're sitting down watching a movie, then who pulls up in the yard? His ex's sister and (i think) the ex too. He doesnt tell them to leave just goes out there happy as a lil sh** So naturally i get angry at him then he gets angry at me (which i saw no point in) Calls me all kinds of names and locks me out of the house. Whatever, I slept in the car and left early the next morning. Sunday i go head over to his house, but see him outside of church, he waves me down. (Now this is the same church the girl that keeps calling my phone goes to.) I say where is B (girl's name). He say fu** you and walks away. I left a note on the door and apologized for making the situation worse by what i said. Leave then go over later, ask to come in, he's says no shuts the door in my face and locks it. So i just turn around an leave. So have gone no contact since then and he hasn't called either. (hurting) Problem: I have small dogs and there out there in a kennel at his house. So i go out there on my lunch every day and take care of them. He is not there so therefore I am keeping the no contact. I live with a friend right now and don't have enough money to get my own place yet, so i guess im just kinda screwed right now. I just feel like im going crazy at this point. some support would be nice thanks guys!
funkybassplayer Posted June 19, 2007 Posted June 19, 2007 sorry but he sounds like an utter tosser! can you not take the dogs back, hes proberbly not caring for them?? hes treating you with no respect at all, you have to lose this loser but get your dogs back. Maybe get male friends to pick them up. Good luck .
Author Bree Posted June 19, 2007 Author Posted June 19, 2007 well it's not that i can't go get my dogs i just have no where to put them right now because i don't have a house (we did live together) I'm staying in my friends apt. right now (no pets allowed) I go out and feed and water them everyday when he is at work. It kills me that i can't take them and move into a house but i haven't been able to find anything i can afford right now
Steveto Posted June 20, 2007 Posted June 20, 2007 talking to other women is one thing..they could just be friends, but to tell you to f off and being rude like that..well, he has something to hide.. No matter how much it hurts..you need to move on or it will only make matters worse and you will be living a horrible life..you need to be more independent..get out of the hole you are in...work hard..make your own money and get that house. Steve
GALT Posted June 20, 2007 Posted June 20, 2007 I will take the other approach. If it was just a friendship with the ex or ex sister, no biggie. I mean you were there, you live there, it is obviousl that you are the girl in his life. You give him a hard time and he resents it. You fight, you leave, you sort of make up. He encourages you to come see him at church and you started right in again with the snide remark about where is ____. So he was pissed and said FU. This is not all his problem. I think NC is not the answer right now, talk to him, let him know how you feel and listen to him and be willing to compromise. I bet this can work out. But it seems like you are a bit demanding and perhaps a bit insecure
Author Bree Posted June 20, 2007 Author Posted June 20, 2007 Thanks for all your replys. Galt: yes your right I am insecure, but only with him you see when we first got together it was about 5 months of going back and forth from me to the ex. He is the first person that has ever cheated on me and I still feel it each an every day. I know i really do have a problem with snide remarks and I'm gonna work on that whether or not we do get back together. I know i'm not innocent in this whole thing, but i did try to talk to him and he told me i could not come in shut the door and locked it. That hurt like hell. I had apologized for the remark too. He still hasn't called and i left him a letter on his door today, so we will see where that gets me. To everyone else I am trying as hard as i can to find another job that pays more so i can get a place sooner, but i haven't had any luck so far. So here goes nothin..........
GALT Posted June 21, 2007 Posted June 21, 2007 Well I did not know the history. But as with any cheating, you need to know if you can forgive and move on...or if you cannot. Nothing wrong with either one, but if you cannot forgive--there really is no sense in pursuing the relationship. If you can, then there is a chance. I am not suggesting forgetting--it never will be forgotten. It is the forgiveness that needs to be dealt with. It sounds like you are not one that can forgive and that is completely fine. But I say that it might be time to just quietly close the chapter of this book and move on, Find a job, reclaim the pooches and look for somethign bigger and better. (and bigger IS better )
whichwayisup Posted June 21, 2007 Posted June 21, 2007 The thing is, what he is actually DOING not only in words, but in actions as well to make you feel more secure? Seems like he's reacting to you reacting and that's what is making it worse. The swearing, locking you out of the house is just UNACCEPTABLE and is cruel! Fact that he locked you out just because he was pissed off is an incredibly selfish and MEAN thing to do. He could have just slept on the couch or asked you to go home...But locking you out is crossing the line! Also, you shouldn't be the one saying sorry all the time. He knows this and knows you'll come back...So, yeah, take time for you! Enjoy afew days of peace - Hang with friends, family and have some fun. Let him stew in it and wonder what's up. And then when he calls, talk to him about your feelings and together you two can either fix things, or take a break. Right now it's an unhealthy relationship.
funkybassplayer Posted June 21, 2007 Posted June 21, 2007 as i said before, the guys well out of order for treating you this way.......get rid of him and move on.......what else may happen in a few months down the line, and learn about you, and maybe you may gain more confidence. My ex was very high maintenance, and although she ended it, now a few weeks down the line, i realise that i am better off out. Its very hard to have a relationship with people like that, and thats why i say that you have to be happy in yourself first, because you will thent return what a caring guy will bring to the table.
Recommended Posts