kristen115 Posted June 19, 2007 Posted June 19, 2007 I have gotten to the point where I dont know where else to go. My husband and I have been together for 13 years - married for 6. We have a beautiful one year old baby girl. We planned the pregnancy down to the month practically, he was supportive throughout the entire pregnancy and maybe through the first 3 months after she was born. We had a major blowup about 4 months ago which almost led to us seperating. Reasons being his inability to step up as a responsible parent, him not being happy with our relationship and my "lack of attention" to our relationship. It got to the point where he began to tell me, and in the heat of our argument, that he is a selfish person and didn't think he'd be like this with the new baby, but doesn't want the responsibility - he needs to take care of himself, etc. After talking about what each of us needed out of the relationship, we decided to work it out for the sake of the many years that we've been together and our new family. He has never shown this side of himself to me and has always been a completely perfect husband, my best friend and dependable. Now, 4 months later, he still seems turned off by the baby and taking care of her. He continues to think of himself when it comes to making plans, never thinking about who is taking care of the baby. He goes out, plays golf, works many hours and never once do I feel that "he would rather be with us". I know - sounds like a mess...what should I do?
Enema Posted June 19, 2007 Posted June 19, 2007 Put it back in? All joking aside, it may be male post partum depression?
FLOOZY Posted June 20, 2007 Posted June 20, 2007 He is being a selfish jerk.. sounds like the baby is too much work.. if he acts like if it is too much then he will leave, then he can make you do all the work.. JMHO, I would seek counseling, alone and separately.. you can discuss all the details.. neither of you are happy thins way.. I don't see how it would hurt..
FLOOZY Posted June 20, 2007 Posted June 20, 2007 maybe the baby is not his? She said they planned it down to the month.. so I am thinking it is his..
JohnHolmes Posted June 20, 2007 Posted June 20, 2007 I have gotten to the point where I dont know where else to go. My husband and I have been together for 13 years - married for 6. We have a beautiful one year old baby girl. We planned the pregnancy down to the month practically, he was supportive throughout the entire pregnancy and maybe through the first 3 months after she was born. We had a major blowup about 4 months ago which almost led to us seperating. Reasons being his inability to step up as a responsible parent, him not being happy with our relationship and my "lack of attention" to our relationship. It got to the point where he began to tell me, and in the heat of our argument, that he is a selfish person and didn't think he'd be like this with the new baby, but doesn't want the responsibility - he needs to take care of himself, etc. After talking about what each of us needed out of the relationship, we decided to work it out for the sake of the many years that we've been together and our new family. He has never shown this side of himself to me and has always been a completely perfect husband, my best friend and dependable. Now, 4 months later, he still seems turned off by the baby and taking care of her. He continues to think of himself when it comes to making plans, never thinking about who is taking care of the baby. He goes out, plays golf, works many hours and never once do I feel that "he would rather be with us". I know - sounds like a mess...what should I do? tell him to join the gym
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