PoshPrincess Posted June 18, 2007 Posted June 18, 2007 SORRY, THE TITLE SHOULD READ 'WORKING SINGLE PARENTS' Need some advice as I am stressing about my son starting school this year. To fill you in on my situation, I split from my son's father over 18 months ago before my son was 2 years old. While we were together I worked part-time but when we broke up (which was my decision) I moved out of the family home, the found a full-time job and somewhere to live. Since then my son has attended nursery full-time which I am pretty happy with. I would ideally like to be at home with him at least one or two days a week but unfortunately finances won't allow. I have no complaints regarding my son's father. He pulls his weight both with looking after his son and financially. He gives me more than the CSA would ask of him and has him stay with him 2/3 nights every week. Basically my problem is this. When my son starts school in September I don't feel comfortable with him being with a childminder before/after school and during holidays (not full-time anyway). I have nothing whatsoever against childminders but I feel it would be unfair on him to have to get used to yet another situation. At the moment his nursery closes for less than 2 weeks per year so he is in the same environment all the time that he is not with myself or his father. What I want to ask is do any of you know of a way round this financially. Sorry, I don't know if I am explaining myself very well here. I want to cut down my hours at work so that I can spend more time with my son. I work in Central London and earn a decent wage but not sure if I can get any help from the government to compensate my loss of salary. I know that if I lived in Local Authority housing I would be able to stay at home, get my rent paid by the government, claim benefits, etc but am not sure where I stand as I own my own property and have a mortgage to pay. Unfortunately when you find yourself in these situations there is no one to give you all the advice you need. You have to go looking for it and discover help for yourself. I don't have any family members who can help me out on a regular basis as they all work full-time. My Mum currently picks my son up from nursery at teatime and looks after him till I return home which is great and helps me out fine at the moment but this doesn't solve the holiday situation! I'm v confused myself so hope you understand what the heck I am on about!
wayderz Posted June 20, 2007 Posted June 20, 2007 Well, I'm just a kid myself(age 17) but I will try and help as best I can. A. Limit your budget: Only buy things you need. If you smoke/drink, quit, the cost of cigarrets and alcohols accumulates to large amounts in short periods of time. Make sure you aren't always buying new things, personally I LOVE to shop, but use the things I have until they are worn out or broken. For instance, I only buy cloths once every year, and continue to wear the old ones until they don't fit. Also, I buy all my clothing from the cheap stores, and still manage to look decent. Don't buy plastic or paper dish ware, buy normal plates and cups..water and dish soap is much more inexpensive than the amount of money you will spend otherwise. B. Time with your child. Work as much as possible while your child is at school, and try to find friends or a day care that can watch over him for the hours you are not at work. Try and raise your child to be self-dependent, so he will be able to stay at home for at least short periods of time by himself. If you have lunch breaks, take them while your child is getting out of school, so you can pick him up and drop him off at a daycare/friends house for the hours while you are still working. C. Get as many hours as you can. To be secure, make sure you work as much as possible on days that he is with his father. ______________ Sorry if I'm not much help >.<
littlekitty Posted June 20, 2007 Posted June 20, 2007 Get yourself down to your local CAB, they are the best placed to advise you as to what you options are. Unfortunately there aren't that many I don't believe. I own my own house with my soon to be hubby and I know when we have a child I'll need to go back to work full time, even then we'll struggle. But it seems that unless I morph into a single mum and get rid of my own home, there's little or no help available to me.
Author PoshPrincess Posted June 20, 2007 Author Posted June 20, 2007 Well, I'm just a kid myself(age 17) but I will try and help as best I can. A. Limit your budget: Only buy things you need. If you smoke/drink, quit, the cost of cigarrets and alcohols accumulates to large amounts in short periods of time. Make sure you aren't always buying new things, personally I LOVE to shop, but use the things I have until they are worn out or broken. For instance, I only buy cloths once every year, and continue to wear the old ones until they don't fit. Also, I buy all my clothing from the cheap stores, and still manage to look decent. Don't buy plastic or paper dish ware, buy normal plates and cups..water and dish soap is much more inexpensive than the amount of money you will spend otherwise. B. Time with your child. Work as much as possible while your child is at school, and try to find friends or a day care that can watch over him for the hours you are not at work. Try and raise your child to be self-dependent, so he will be able to stay at home for at least short periods of time by himself. If you have lunch breaks, take them while your child is getting out of school, so you can pick him up and drop him off at a daycare/friends house for the hours while you are still working. C. Get as many hours as you can. To be secure, make sure you work as much as possible on days that he is with his father. ______________ Sorry if I'm not much help >.< Thanks for your advice Wayderz but it was more finding out about whether there is any financial help that I am legally entitled to, than anything else. I am already making serious cutbacks as far as shopping is concered although I daresay at 17 you will look a lot better in cheaper clothes than I do at my age;)! With regards to childcare etc, as I said before, I don't have family members that can help and I don't WANT to leave him with strangers after school/during school hols when he is stuck at school all day too. I know there are many other people who have to do this but I was just trying to find a way round it. I wouldn't be able to go home for lunch as I work in central London (an hour's journey from where we live and my son goes to school). Never mind - I should probably go to the CAB instead. I really appreciate you trying to help.
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