Opposites Attract VS. "Birds of feather flock together"

[LoveLace]

How many couples do you know of or have seen (let's not include celebrity couples!) that are very happy and totally opposite of each other, or vice-versa? Which way, in your opinion, seems to represent the healthier relationships? The ideal for myself would be to have things common, but different interests in order to learn from each other. But let's say the in-between didn't exist (ok well I"m already convinced it doesn't!) Have you seen more relationships survive as opposites, or when they have almost anything in common from interests and hobbies to family structure, etc? Is anyone here married to someone they consider a total opposite? If so, how does it affect the relationship?

[Hitman10000]

All I gotta say is if you and the other significant other..totally get each other and seem to communicate well this relationship has a better chance than two people who are going through the motions trying to imitate what they perceive as a good relationship.

 

Uh, to tell you the truth. Good buds of mines do not have similar common interests. I love being in the outdoors and fixing things...One bud likes cleaning constantly but doesn't dig the outdoor thing..me and him like similar rock music but not really that similar since many others like rock music. Another bud likes hip hop music, which I don't like..plus he spends his weeknights playing games which I don't anymore but we totally get each other and can talk like we're brothers.

 

Take Brad Pitt and his former wife Jennifer Aniston. Come on , it was so obvious. Brad wanted a kid and she didn't! She also had a good girl image while Brad Pitt had a bad boy image. What he needed was also a bad girl..but a mature one at that and he got it : Angelina Jolie. Brad was very attracted to not only the open mindedness of Angelina but her motherhoodness - He took a look at Aniston and all he saw was "Daddy's Little Girl" and thought to himself "I got one life to live, I am not wasting time."

[alphamale]

well LL, the more things a couple has in common the greater the chance it will survive a long time. because there are fewer sources of conflict. if you're looking for short-term fun then the opposites thing is a good way to go.

[doiask42much]

All I know is that I would HATE to date someone like me, so I think opposite is good. Heh. (And I have met some guys who were similar to me. Scared the bejesus out of me and I headed for the hills.)

 

Yeah, my bf and I actually have little in common, but I think he has helped me become a kinder, more thoughtful person. We are finding it slightly hard to find things to do together though, since we don't really like any of the same things, but I have no problem doing stuff he'd like to do, if only he would TELL me what that is!

 

We overlap on sex and other deviant behaviors, food tastes, and humor somewhat, but that's kind of it. I think that over time, we have become more like one another though? And I think that's common, for once-polarized couples to gravitate more toward meeting each other in the middle. For example, his ex used to chastize him for his sense of humor and told him it wasn't "nice" so he turned into a p***y for a number of years. I reawakened it in him, sort of, whereas he taught me to think more about how things I say make others feel, which I rarely used to do.

 

We have also shared aspects of our respective cultures with each other asd well, like customs of his family's are now customs of mine, and I've introduced him to cuisine from my culture.

[Trialbyfire]

In looking at the successful couples I've seen, I think there has to be a ton of similar core values and then enough differences to keep the interest and the passion. No one wants a yes man or woman.

[johan]

In looking at the successful couples I've seen, I think there has to be a ton of similar core values and then enough differences to keep the interest and the passion. No one wants a yes man or woman.

 

I couldn't agree more.

[Trialbyfire]

I couldn't agree more.

I'll have to disagree with that statement.

[johan]

I'll have to disagree with that statement.

 

Well, that just makes me want you.

[LoveLace]

I'll have to disagree with that statement.

 

 

TBF, you disagree that no one wants a yes man or woman?

[Trialbyfire]

TBF, you disagree that no one wants a yes man or woman?

No, it just means I rarely agree with Johan.

[johan]

No, it just means I rarely agree with Johan.

 

Well, that just makes me want you more.

[Trialbyfire]

Well, that just makes me want you more.

Stop being difficult. Okay, okay, I agree.